College Apartment Decor

... good part of my granddaughter’s college tuition and campus housing. Now... get new flooring throughout the apartment, except for the bathroom. It... not a fan of gray decor; IMO it’s a current trend.... Even our timeshare used gray decor in their last remodel. But... than the rest of the apartment because what works in the ... space and vice versa. The apartment tiles will be the same ...

Give me ideas on decor plz submitted by /u/zachhhhyyyyy to r/malelivingspace [link] [comments]

I'm bitter that the older generations climbed to the top and took the ladder with them. I'm bitter they bought all the affordable housing and are now selling them for a 1000% markup. I'm bitter that the retirement age will be raised and yet I'm still getting taxed for their social security. I'm bitter that they hold most of the leadership positions at my corporation and refuse to invest in the younger generations. I've been economically cheated out of living my life and I'm just bitter. I know it's not a healthy feeling and I'm not proud of it. But I don't know what the point of anything is when there's just no incentive anymore to keep trying. I could give you a list of grievances I have as a Gen Z'er, but I'm in the apartment-hunting cycle again and I've been reminded how pointless and hopeless this all is. I know this comes with living in an expensive city as I am native to one, but it's so demoralizing to dedicate 40+ hours of my LIFE to a corporate job and still have THREE roommates. I am in the 75th percentile of income for people my age and I work hard. I don't intend to marry or have a significant other to split the rent with as romance is not something I'm not really intended to experience. How can I even begin to build the life I want when a studio in Brooklyn is $3000? It keeps raising and I'm not getting paid more to match it. I can't catch up. I'll never catch up. I'm in my mid-twenties and my current apartment with three roommates looks like a college house. I'm so sick of being a nomad. I want a place I can call home. I want a place I can decorate. What's the point of working half my life away and still living in squalor? I'm sure I sound like a brat. Living alone is a luxury, I know, and it's not something I need to experience now but I'm grieving over the fact that it's something I most likely will never experience with the way things are going. I don't know what the point is anymore in all of this, and I'm bitter that nihilism is now so deeply engrained into me. --- ETA: ETA 2: edit of edit. for clarity and to add point #4 ETA #3: i think i accidentally deleted a portion of my second edit. my bad if it looks wonky jesus christ this post gained a lot of traction. i feel obligated to clarify a few things regarding the discourse: my intent wasn’t to start a generational debate or to garner any sympathy for myself, it was just to get some things off my chest as i’ve felt really suffocated and nihilistic lately. whether you think i’m entitled to these feelings or i’m just being whiny i truly — and i cannot emphasize this enough — dont gaf. Boomers/Gen X “Try Not to Make Everything About Me” challenge. i don’t gaf about how much “harder” you think you had it as a Boomer or Gen X’er. because the truth is: you didn’t. lol. and stop trying to convince me you did you’re all melodramatic and awful (not so fun being on the other side, eh?). if you want to complain about your suffering, hijack someone else’s conversation or maybe - i don’t know - start your own. and stop cosplaying a forgiving economy as hard work and grit. your PeePaw who worked at the Planters Peanut factory for 50 years did not work harder than the average Gen Z’er because he was able to buy his first house at 24. if you truly believe that, i urge you to stop your family from procreating, as exposing the human race to your imbecile DNA is nothing short of biological terrorism. to those telling me i should move away from the city - where should i move to, pray tell? my native city of Los Angeles, a place notorious for affordable housing? pushing people — non wealthy people — out of urban areas is economical eugenics and is not the solution. i actually think the McMansions should be the ones to leave. make the west village gay again! to add to the point above, stop telling me to move to a midsize, less expensive city. i've pigeonholed myself into an esoteric career that only exists within Los Angeles and New York. no, i am not exaggerating - there are 0 job opportunities outside of these two areas. i like my job and i am not willing to sacrifice it for Cincinnati, Ohio. i do not want to join your Milwaukee brewery cult. so spare me your Midwestern sermon. i am not complaining about not affording to live by myself in trendy parts such as “Bushwick or Williamsburg” as some underdeveloped trollop claimed. please be serious and stop projecting whatever performative transplant rage you have onto me. i don’t need lectures about displacement or gentrification when my family and i are victims of it ourselves. no, Millennials, i wasn’t referencing your generation in my rant. we have a lot of shared experiences, and you guys have been consistently advocating for the younger generation, which i applaud you for, considering that wasn’t something you received from Boomers & Gen X yes, i vote. no, i don’t vote republican as i have at least some modicum of intelligence. no, i am not an echo chamber who is spouting the same unoriginal rhetoric as my peers. if you’ve heard this before, it’s probably because it’s a unilateral feeling across my generation. all beliefs are my own. i wont bore you with my politics but i will say that i gave Scum Manifesto three stars on GoodReads. take with that what you will. submitted by /u/slowlikehoneyyyyy to r/offmychest [link] [comments]

I’ve been part of the same friend group since high school (11 girls, all in our early 20s now). Once college started, we spread out but we’re all still friends. When the occasion calls for it (holidays, milestones, etc) one of us will throw a party for the group. We’ll have a theme, decorations, entertainment, food, the works. It’s our way of feeling fancy and staying close despite all being broke college students. Most recently, we wanted to do a New Year’s party. Multiple people wanted to host, but one girl, “Maya”, was really vocal about wanting to host. She’s never been the one to throw the party before so we agreed. She said she had a specific vibe in mind, wanted it to be classy and fun, told us to dress up. We met up at her apartment (a 2.5 hour drive from me, and farther from some of the others). However, when I got there, I found out that for the entire gathering all she had ordered food-wise was one pizza. No sides, no desserts, not even drinks— literally just one pizza. One pizza for ten people is… not a lot of food. Obviously we split it and had a great time, but I was pretty upset and hungry. Towards the end of the party, Maya asked if we could each pitch in $5 for the pizza. This made matters worse since the pizza most certainly did not cost $50 in the first place, but it’s $5 and she’s a friend so whatever. Now, Valentine’s Day is coming up, and Maya said she wants to host again. Nobody in our group chat said anything, but I also offered to host and four or five people immediately agreed that I should. Maya called me and asked if she had done something wrong. She and I are pretty close so I felt comfortable telling her that her party was super fun, but ordering one pizza for 10 people and then asking us to pay her back for it may have turned people off from wanting her to host again. She got defensive and told me that she was having some financial issues at the time, and I said I understood, because I do, because we’re all broke college students, but that if that was the case she just shouldn’t have offered to host. She told me I was being elitist and stuck up and we more or less ended the call on bad terms. Then, today, a few of my friends have told me that Maya’s been telling them that I said she shouldn’t host any more parties. That is NOT what I said, not at all, but when I explained and told my friends what I had said they told me that I was being super rude to her and that I should have just deflected and made up an excuse for why I wanted to host the party. I think that’s BS, and that being a good friend means standing up to your friends when you think they’ve made a mistake. They said I probably humiliated her and made her feel bad for not being able to afford to buy us all food. I feel really bad about it now, but I still maintain that she shouldn’t have offered to host if she couldn’t afford to feed us. Other people were willing to host. So, AITAH for telling her what I did? submitted by /u/StickyLoner4404 to r/AITAH [link] [comments]

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/williwicey AITAH? my boyfriend brought home a girl for the holidays Originally posted to r/TwoHotTakes Thanks to u/queenlegolas & u/soayherder for suggesting this BoRU Original Post Dec 22 2025 hello! long time listener of twohottakes, and now the time (unfortunately) has come to make my own post. i, (f24) am with my longtime boyfriend and best friend since birth (m23, let’s call him will). a little backstory, our mom’s were best friends in high school and since we are only less than a year apart, we grew up very close and always hung out. will, his twin brother (let’s call him wyatt), and i were always together growing up. going on vacations, sleepovers during summer etc. will and i basically have had crushes on each other since we were in elementary school. but only officially started dating when i was a sophomore and he was a freshman in high school. we’ve only ever dated each other. then, it was college time for me since i was a grade earlier. we both thought i should take a gap year so we could start together. well…. we both ended up taking multiple gap years lol. we had decent jobs and had the luxury of being able to travel so we did. so this year, we all three started college for the first time (plus will and wyatt’s best friend, we’ll call him ian, m23). but as the years went by (before i started college) i kept switching on ideas for majors. i ended up choosing one they didn’t have at the college we all wanted to go to, so i talked with will about it, and we decided we could still make it work since the college that has the major i wanted was only a 1 hour car ride away. well, college started. i ended up absolutely hating my major, so i will be switching and transferring to the original college of choice which will is super happy about and i’ll be moving into the apartment he has with wyatt and ian. now, moving onto the actual problem. it is of course winter break and i was so excited to spend time with will since we didn’t get to see each other much during the semester even though we texted as much as we could and always face-timed at night even if it was only for 5 minutes. so imagine my surprise when i come home for break and go to his parents house, and there’s a girl sitting in the living room with them. will comes up and greets me like everything’s normal, and introduces me to the girl (we’ll call her abby, f19). wyatt tells me that they’ve all grown close to her at college and that she’s become like a bestfriend to them.. i was floored by this. will never once told me that he made any good friends at college, let alone a girl. i could tell that will knew from my face that i wasn’t exactly thrilled at this, but since we were in front of people i kept my mouth shut. i went to go help will and wyatt’s mom in the kitchen not long after that, and i asked her if she knew anything about abby, like maybe her family lived too far and she couldn’t afford to travel back, maybe she had a bad home life? you know, anything that could make a bit of sense. she told me she had asked the same question, because she was a bit weirded out as well, but they told her she had a good relationship with her family, but wanted to spend christmas with friends this year. this rubbed me the completely wrong way. i can’t imagine ditching my family to spend christmas with two guys i’ve only known for 3-4 months? especially when you aren’t dating one. (a good time to mention that wyatt is gay). i talked to will about it later that night and told him that i was uncomfortable that she was here, especially because it was supposed to be our time together after months apart, plus it’s a family holiday and she isn’t family. and he told me that he understands, but she’s just a good friend and wanted to spend christmas with them and he felt too bad to tell her no. and by the way, this isn’t a “is my boyfriend cheating or not” post. i genuinely trust will and i don’t think he would ever cheat on me. now, i have to admit i do get jealous sometimes, but i really don’t think i am that unreasonable. i don’t mind him having a friendship with a different gender (as long as boundaries aren’t crossed) but i feel like this is a huge boundary. we were supposed to use this time to catch up, but now this girl who has already been spending time with them for months is here. and i thought maybe she’ll spend most of her time with wyatt while will and i can do our own thing. nope. we went ice skating two days ago (which is a tradition of ours) and guess who wanted to come as soon as we got ready? abby. we tried to watch a move in the basement last night. guess who showed up? abby. we went to go look at christmas lights a few nights ago. who wanted to come? abby. needed to go christmas shopping. who wanted to come with? abby. had a date for the christmas market, she knew it was a date and who wanted to come? abby. (luckily, this time will told her no) (also should mention the only time wyatt was with us during any of that was for the christmas lights. that’s it, so it wasn’t like she just wanted to be included and didn’t want to be alone) i finally snapped tonight when will and i we’re getting ready to go to my grandma’s to decorate cookies like we do every year, abby asked where we were going and will answered. she really had the audacity to ask, again, “can i come with”? this is where i might(?) be the a-hole. i told her that no, she can’t come. that she’s intruded enough so far on this break and that she knew we hadn’t seen each-other in 4 months and yet she can’t stop inserting herself. i told her to go back to her family for christmas because she wasn’t apart of this family and never would be. she cried and ran to the guest room. will got super mad at me, and told me i was being ridiculous and a “jealous brat”, but i’m genuinely fed up. this girl is either wanting my boyfriend, or she has a MAJOR boundary problem. but either way, i don’t want to deal with either problem. it was super awkward at my grandmas as will is still mad at me. but now that i was thinking about it, i can’t help being mad at him too. he lied to me (or withheld information, i guess) about getting close to another girl (and now that i’ve met said girl, i’m very concerned because she seems unhealthily attached to my boyfriend since she hasn’t really made any effort to hang out with wyatt) and i think letting her come to christmas and our reunion was super disrespectful and i know for a fact if the tables were turned he would be enraged. christmas is now in two days, and i’m not even excited anymore. i know anything we’ll try to do abby will just insert herself. and this was my favorite holiday. i texted ian about her, and he told me that she seemed closer to wyatt then will when they were at college? so i have no idea what’s going on. so, i guess, AITA for blowing up at her? any advice on what to do now? thank you for any advice! RELEVANT COMMENTS Comfortable-Grape969 I don’t think you’re wrong for feeling blindsided, but I do think you need to talk to Will directly before letting this spiral. College changes people and social circles fast, and it sounds like he didn’t realize how big this would feel to you. Bringing someone home for Christmas without warning your partner is a bad call, full stop. That said, jumping to conclusions won’t help. Tell him clearly why this upset you and see how he responds — his reaction will tell you a lot. OOP i’ll definitely talk with him soon! i think i need to calm down a bit first though, writing this just made me more angry at him and the situation. my mind definitely jumps to conclusions fast which definitely doesn’t help my case. ~ whatdouthinkabtthis girl why didn’t your boyfriend tell you? You actually showed up and neither one of your lifelong friends thought to mention another person would be there, let alone some girl 4 years younger than yall. You talk to him every day and he never mentioned any new friends? Let alone this one who they let or invited to come home with them for christmas. i’d be annoyed at both because you’re spose to be friends, but i’d be side eyeing your man. all very sus. all very strange OOP this is what angered me the most! i don’t understand why neither of them told me. since we’re older than the normal age of starting college and he was going with his brother and best friend, i honestly just assumed we wouldn’t be trying to go out and make friends (which i understand can sometimes happen naturally) so i never really asked about it and i can’t understand for the life of me figure out why he couldn’t just tell me. i’m going to talk to him later about it for sure. Update Dec 23, 2025 (next day) hello everyone! thank you so much for all the comments and advice. since i’m going to be busy during christmas, i wanted to update this today. now here is the update: after two panic attacks and thinking way too much, i tried to calm myself down and after a few hours i texted him and asked if he could come over so we could talk. he arrived and instantly apologized to me for calling me a jealous brat, and said i had every right to be annoyed and upset, he just wished i was less harsh. i apologized as well, and said i was a bit too hard, and i told him i should have communicated better (thanks for all the advice on that, i realize i definitely should have said something sooner, rather than letting it all blow up), and he told me that he should communicate better as well in the future, which we promised to do. after that, i immediately asked why he even kept his friendship with her a secret in the first place. he told me that he knew i’d be upset about his friendship with a girl and he didn’t want to tell me and make me worry whilst we were at different colleges. while i’m ngl that would have stressed me out a bit, i still had a right to know. my face must have shown i wasn’t the happiest with that excuse as he instantly told me he’s sorry again and that he made a mistake in the way he handled this whole thing, but that he genuinely doesn’t have any feelings for her except friendship, and he would never cheat on me. he told me his mom sat him down after i left, and laid it out for him. about how suspicious this must look to me, about how trust was broken, and the fact he completely blind sided me and he told me that really made him think about his actions. he looked very genuine and even was starting to tear up. will then told me that abby had asked wyatt a couple weeks ago if she could come to their christmas instead of her parents this year because she wanted to hang out with them instead and thought it would be fun. will told me that wyatt texted him about the idea as soon as she asked, and that he instantly shut it down, saying it probably wasn’t a good idea since i wouldn’t like it (he showed me the text messages between wyatt and him without me even asking to see them). but wyatt told will that since it was the first time will and i had been apart before christmas break, that we would probably be spending even more time alone together than normal, and it could be nice if he had a friend to spend that time with, and will felt bad so he agreed. i asked him why he couldn’t have just told me that from the get-go, but he said “he thought i would understand that he wasn’t the one that invited her” which.. ngl pissed me off. because what do you mean?? obviously i told him that that’s something to work on with the communication and he agreed. he said he had absolutely no idea that abby would insist on intruding on our alone time together, and that he also should have told her no after the 2nd time she tried, but he was too shocked and confused by her behavior to do anything because she never acted that way towards him at college. which lined up with what ian told me earlier, that she seemed more close to wyatt. and i also asked wyatt and ian to confirm and they told me that she never acted that way towards him at college. at all. will told me that he realized that abby must like him after she kept trying to include herself in our plans the third time, and didn’t make much of an effort to hang out with wyatt, which was the whole reason she was invited. wyatt also confirmed all of this on call and told me he was also surprised by her behavior this whole time and had tried to talk to with her about it and she apparently said that she didn’t mean any harm and just wanted to hang out with will as well. which… i’m not sure i really buy. wyatt also said whenever he would ask if she wanted to go and do something with him, she would always say she wanted to stay inside and relax.. which.. girl. you had no problem trying to go out with will and i when we left the house. will told me in morning once we go back to his house, he’ll tell abby that it’s best that she spends christmas with her family, and that once they get back to college it’s best they all keep their distance. wyatt and ian also agreed to the same thing so she wouldn’t still be around hanging out with them. i’ll also be transferring to their college for the upcoming spring semester as well, which was already planned before this whole incident, so it’s not something they could be lying about since they know i’ll be living with them soon. so, now it’s done. abby didn’t take it particularly well, and told us that she would back off if she could stay and that it wasn’t fair to make her leave the day before christmas eve, but will remained firm with her, which i appreciated. i did apologize to her for being too harsh, which she just nodded. wyatt already drove abby back home a few hours ago and a huge weight is lifted off my shoulders. i realize it’s not the most thrilling of updates, but i’m glad we promised each other better communication as i see that was something we were struggling with, on both ends. thank you again for all the advice and comments and i hope everyone has a merry christmas and happy holidays, and if you don’t celebrate i hope you have a great day as well. THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7 submitted by /u/Direct-Caterpillar77 to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

This is a repost. The original was posted in r/TwoHotTakes by user willowicey. I'm not the original poster. Status: Concluded Editor's Note: I added paragraph breaks Original December 23, 2025 hello! long time listener of twohottakes, and now the time (unfortunately) has come to make my own post. i, (f24) am with my longtime boyfriend and best friend since birth (m23, let’s call him will). a little backstory, our mom’s were best friends in high school and since we are only less than a year apart, we grew up very close and always hung out. will, his twin brother (let’s call him wyatt), and i were always together growing up. going on vacations, sleepovers during summer etc. will and i basically have had crushes on each other since we were in elementary school. but only officially started dating when i was a sophomore and he was a freshman in high school. we’ve only ever dated each other. then, it was college time for me since i was a grade earlier. we both thought i should take a gap year so we could start together. well…. we both ended up taking multiple gap years lol. we had decent jobs and had the luxury of being able to travel so we did. so this year, we all three started college for the first time (plus will and wyatt’s best friend, we’ll call him ian, m23). but as the years went by (before i started college) i kept switching on ideas for majors. i ended up choosing one they didn’t have at the college we all wanted to go to, so i talked with will about it, and we decided we could still make it work since the college that has the major i wanted was only a 1 hour car ride away. well, college started. i ended up absolutely hating my major, so i will be switching and transferring to the original college of choice which will is super happy about and i’ll be moving into the apartment he has with wyatt and ian. now, moving onto the actual problem. it is of course winter break and i was so excited to spend time with will since we didn’t get to see each other much during the semester even though we texted as much as we could and always face-timed at night even if it was only for 5 minutes. so imagine my surprise when i come home for break and go to his parents house, and there’s a girl sitting in the living room with them. will comes up and greets me like everything’s normal, and introduces me to the girl (we’ll call her abby, f19). wyatt tells me that they’ve all grown close to her at college and that she’s become like a bestfriend to them.. i was floored by this. will never once told me that he made any good friends at college, let alone a girl. i could tell that will knew from my face that i wasn’t exactly thrilled at this, but since we were in front of people i kept my mouth shut. i went to go help will and wyatt’s mom in the kitchen not long after that, and i asked her if she knew anything about abby, like maybe her family lived too far and she couldn’t afford to travel back, maybe she had a bad home life? you know, anything that could make a bit of sense. she told me she had asked the same question, because she was a bit weirded out as well, but they told her she had a good relationship with her family, but wanted to spend christmas with friends this year. this rubbed me the completely wrong way. i can’t imagine ditching my family to spend christmas with two guys i’ve only known for 3-4 months? especially when you aren’t dating one. (a good time to mention that wyatt is gay). i talked to will about it later that night and told him that i was uncomfortable that she was here, especially because it was supposed to be our time together after months apart, plus it’s a family holiday and she isn’t family. and he told me that he understands, but she’s just a good friend and wanted to spend christmas with them and he felt too bad to tell her no. and by the way, this isn’t a “is my boyfriend cheating or not” post. i genuinely trust will and i don’t think he would ever cheat on me. now, i have to admit i do get jealous sometimes, but i really don’t think i am that unreasonable. i don’t mind him having a friendship with a different gender (as long as boundaries aren’t crossed) but i feel like this is a huge boundary. we were supposed to use this time to catch up, but now this girl who has already been spending time with them for months is here. and i thought maybe she’ll spend most of her time with wyatt while will and i can do our own thing. nope. we went ice skating two days ago (which is a tradition of ours) and guess who wanted to come as soon as we got ready? abby. we tried to watch a move in the basement last night. guess who showed up? abby. we went to go look at christmas lights a few nights ago. who wanted to come? abby. needed to go christmas shopping. who wanted to come with? abby. had a date for the christmas market, she knew it was a date and who wanted to come? abby. (luckily, this time will told her no) (also should mention the only time wyatt was with us during any of that was for the christmas lights. that’s it, so it wasn’t like she just wanted to be included and didn’t want to be alone) i finally snapped tonight when will and i we’re getting ready to go to my grandma’s to decorate cookies like we do every year, abby asked where we were going and will answered. she really had the audacity to ask, again, “can i come with”? this is where i might(?) be the a-hole. i told her that no, she can’t come. that she’s intruded enough so far on this break and that she knew we hadn’t seen each-other in 4 months and yet she can’t stop inserting herself. i told her to go back to her family for christmas because she wasn’t apart of this family and never would be. she cried and ran to the guest room. will got super mad at me, and told me i was being ridiculous and a “jealous brat”, but i’m genuinely fed up. this girl is either wanting my boyfriend, or she has a MAJOR boundary problem. but either way, i don’t want to deal with either problem. it was super awkward at my grandmas as will is still mad at me. but now that i was thinking about it, i can’t help being mad at him too. he lied to me (or withheld information, i guess) about getting close to another girl (and now that i’ve met said girl, i’m very concerned because she seems unhealthily attached to my boyfriend since she hasn’t really made any effort to hang out with wyatt) and i think letting her come to christmas and our reunion was super disrespectful and i know for a fact if the tables were turned he would be enraged. christmas is now in two days, and i’m not even excited anymore. i know anything we’ll try to do abby will just insert herself. and this was my favorite holiday. i texted ian about her, and he told me that she seemed closer to wyatt then will when they were at college? so i have no idea what’s going on. so, i guess, AITA for blowing up at her? any advice on what to do now? thank you for any advice! Consensus: It's Will's fault for not telling her Abby was coming. He is also potentially cheating with Abby. Comments by OOP: i’ll definitely talk with him soon! i think i need to calm down a bit first though, writing this just made me more angry at him and the situation. my mind definitely jumps to conclusions fast which definitely doesn’t help my case. this is what angered me the most! i don’t understand why neither of them told me. since we’re older than the normal age of starting college and he was going with his brother and best friend, i honestly just assumed we wouldn’t be trying to go out and make friends (which i understand can sometimes happen naturally) so i never really asked about it and i can’t understand for the life of me figure out why he couldn’t just tell me. i’m going to talk to him later about it for sure. I don’t believe anyone who writes like you do has ever been to college. [dragonrider1965]*[Downvoted] well damn someone needs to tell my english professor then since i ended the semester with a 84% 😭[OOP] Update December 23, 2025, about 18 hours later hello everyone! thank you so much for all the comments and advice. since i’m going to be busy during christmas, i wanted to update this today. now here is the update: after two panic attacks and thinking way too much, i tried to calm myself down and after a few hours i texted him and asked if he could come over so we could talk. he arrived and instantly apologized to me for calling me a jealous brat, and said i had every right to be annoyed and upset, he just wished i was less harsh. i apologized as well, and said i was a bit too hard, and i told him i should have communicated better (thanks for all the advice on that, i realize i definitely should have said something sooner, rather than letting it all blow up), and he told me that he should communicate better as well in the future, which we promised to do. after that, i immediately asked why he even kept his friendship with her a secret in the first place. he told me that he knew i’d be upset about his friendship with a girl and he didn’t want to tell me and make me worry whilst we were at different colleges. while i’m ngl that would have stressed me out a bit, i still had a right to know. my face must have shown i wasn’t the happiest with that excuse as he instantly told me he’s sorry again and that he made a mistake in the way he handled this whole thing, but that he genuinely doesn’t have any feelings for her except friendship, and he would never cheat on me. he told me his mom sat him down after i left, and laid it out for him. about how suspicious this must look to me, about how trust was broken, and the fact he completely blind sided me and he told me that really made him think about his actions. he looked very genuine and even was starting to tear up. will then told me that abby had asked wyatt a couple weeks ago if she could come to their christmas instead of her parents this year because she wanted to hang out with them instead and thought it would be fun. will told me that wyatt texted him about the idea as soon as she asked, and that he instantly shut it down, saying it probably wasn’t a good idea since i wouldn’t like it (he showed me the text messages between wyatt and him without me even asking to see them). but wyatt told will that since it was the first time will and i had been apart before christmas break, that we would probably be spending even more time alone together than normal, and it could be nice if he had a friend to spend that time with, and will felt bad so he agreed. i asked him why he couldn’t have just told me that from the get-go, but he said “he thought i would understand that he wasn’t the one that invited her” which.. ngl pissed me off. because what do you mean?? obviously i told him that that’s something to work on with the communication and he agreed. he said he had absolutely no idea that abby would insist on intruding on our alone time together, and that he also should have told her no after the 2nd time she tried, but he was too shocked and confused by her behavior to do anything because she never acted that way towards him at college. which lined up with what ian told me earlier, that she seemed more close to wyatt. and i also asked wyatt and ian to confirm and they told me that she never acted that way towards him at college. at all. will told me that he realized that abby must like him after she kept trying to include herself in our plans the third time, and didn’t make much of an effort to hang out with wyatt, which was the whole reason she was invited. wyatt also confirmed all of this on call and told me he was also surprised by her behavior this whole time and had tried to talk to with her about it and she apparently said that she didn’t mean any harm and just wanted to hang out with will as well. which… i’m not sure i really buy. wyatt also said whenever he would ask if she wanted to go and do something with him, she would always say she wanted to stay inside and relax.. which.. girl. you had no problem trying to go out with will and i when we left the house. will told me in morning once we go back to his house, he’ll tell abby that it’s best that she spends christmas with her family, and that once they get back to college it’s best they all keep their distance. wyatt and ian also agreed to the same thing so she wouldn’t still be around hanging out with them. i’ll also be transferring to their college for the upcoming spring semester as well, which was already planned before this whole incident, so it’s not something they could be lying about since they know i’ll be living with them soon. so, now it’s done. abby didn’t take it particularly well, and told us that she would back off if she could stay and that it wasn’t fair to make her leave the day before christmas eve, but will remained firm with her, which i appreciated. i did apologize to her for being too harsh, which she just nodded. wyatt already drove abby back home a few hours ago and a huge weight is lifted off my shoulders. i realize it’s not the most thrilling of updates, but i’m glad we promised each other better communication as i see that was something we were struggling with, on both ends. thank you again for all the advice and comments and i hope everyone has a merry christmas and happy holidays, and if you don’t celebrate i hope you have a great day as well. I'm not the original poster submitted by /u/Schattenspringer to r/BORUpdates [link] [comments]

hello! long time listener of twohottakes, and now the time (unfortunately) has come to make my own post. i, (f24) am with my longtime boyfriend and best friend since birth (m23, let’s call him will). a little backstory, our mom’s were best friends in high school and since we are only less than a year apart, we grew up very close and always hung out. will, his twin brother (let’s call him wyatt), and i were always together growing up. going on vacations, sleepovers during summer etc. will and i basically have had crushes on each other since we were in elementary school. but only officially started dating when i was a sophomore and he was a freshman in high school. we’ve only ever dated each other. then, it was college time for me since i was a grade earlier. we both thought i should take a gap year so we could start together. well…. we both ended up taking multiple gap years lol. we had decent jobs and had the luxury of being able to travel so we did. so this year, we all three started college for the first time (plus will and wyatt’s best friend, we’ll call him ian, m23). but as the years went by (before i started college) i kept switching on ideas for majors. i ended up choosing one they didn’t have at the college we all wanted to go to, so i talked with will about it, and we decided we could still make it work since the college that has the major i wanted was only a 1 hour car ride away. well, college started. i ended up absolutely hating my major, so i will be switching and transferring to the original college of choice which will is super happy about and i’ll be moving into the apartment he has with wyatt and ian. now, moving onto the actual problem. it is of course winter break and i was so excited to spend time with will since we didn’t get to see each other much during the semester even though we texted as much as we could and always face-timed at night even if it was only for 5 minutes. so imagine my surprise when i come home for break and go to his parents house, and there’s a girl sitting in the living room with them. will comes up and greets me like everything’s normal, and introduces me to the girl (we’ll call her abby, f19). wyatt tells me that they’ve all grown close to her at college and that she’s become like a bestfriend to them.. i was floored by this. will never once told me that he made any good friends at college, let alone a girl. i could tell that will knew from my face that i wasn’t exactly thrilled at this, but since we were in front of people i kept my mouth shut. i went to go help will and wyatt’s mom in the kitchen not long after that, and i asked her if she knew anything about abby, like maybe her family lived too far and she couldn’t afford to travel back, maybe she had a bad home life? you know, anything that could make a bit of sense. she told me she had asked the same question, because she was a bit weirded out as well, but they told her she had a good relationship with her family, but wanted to spend christmas with friends this year. this rubbed me the completely wrong way. i can’t imagine ditching my family to spend christmas with two guys i’ve only known for 3-4 months? especially when you aren’t dating one. (a good time to mention that wyatt is gay). i talked to will about it later that night and told him that i was uncomfortable that she was here, especially because it was supposed to be our time together after months apart, plus it’s a family holiday and she isn’t family. and he told me that he understands, but she’s just a good friend and wanted to spend christmas with them and he felt too bad to tell her no. and by the way, this isn’t a “is my boyfriend cheating or not” post. i genuinely trust will and i don’t think he would ever cheat on me. now, i have to admit i do get jealous sometimes, but i really don’t think i am that unreasonable. i don’t mind him having a friendship with a different gender (as long as boundaries aren’t crossed) but i feel like this is a huge boundary. we were supposed to use this time to catch up, but now this girl who has already been spending time with them for months is here. and i thought maybe she’ll spend most of her time with wyatt while will and i can do our own thing. nope. we went ice skating two days ago (which is a tradition of ours) and guess who wanted to come as soon as we got ready? abby. we tried to watch a move in the basement last night. guess who showed up? abby. we went to go look at christmas lights a few nights ago. who wanted to come? abby. needed to go christmas shopping. who wanted to come with? abby. had a date for the christmas market, she knew it was a date and who wanted to come? abby. (luckily, this time will told her no) (also should mention the only time wyatt was with us during any of that was for the christmas lights. that’s it, so it wasn’t like she just wanted to be included and didn’t want to be alone) i finally snapped tonight when will and i we’re getting ready to go to my grandma’s to decorate cookies like we do every year, abby asked where we were going and will answered. she really had the audacity to ask, again, “can i come with”? this is where i might(?) be the a-hole. i told her that no, she can’t come. that she’s intruded enough so far on this break and that she knew we hadn’t seen each-other in 4 months and yet she can’t stop inserting herself. i told her to go back to her family for christmas because she wasn’t apart of this family and never would be. she cried and ran to the guest room. will got super mad at me, and told me i was being ridiculous and a “jealous brat”, but i’m genuinely fed up. this girl is either wanting my boyfriend, or she has a MAJOR boundary problem. but either way, i don’t want to deal with either problem. it was super awkward at my grandmas as will is still mad at me. but now that i was thinking about it, i can’t help being mad at him too. he lied to me (or withheld information, i guess) about getting close to another girl (and now that i’ve met said girl, i’m very concerned because she seems unhealthily attached to my boyfriend since she hasn’t really made any effort to hang out with wyatt) and i think letting her come to christmas and our reunion was super disrespectful and i know for a fact if the tables were turned he would be enraged. christmas is now in two days, and i’m not even excited anymore. i know anything we’ll try to do abby will just insert herself. and this was my favorite holiday. i texted ian about her, and he told me that she seemed closer to wyatt then will when they were at college? so i have no idea what’s going on. so, i guess, AITA for blowing up at her? any advice on what to do now? thank you for any advice! submitted by /u/willowicey to r/TwoHotTakes [link] [comments]