Formal Men Outfit

... bows and ribbons. Such an outfit wasn't complete without a hat... was to always choose the outfit for Sylvia first and herself... look at the gathering crowd. Men and women were staring. Some... would like to delay the formal ceremony until after you've stepped ...

...smart-casual outfit, these shirts offer flexibility that suits modern lifestyles. Men ...fashionable look without requiring complicated outfit coordination. Another advantage is ... where flexibility is important. Men increasingly prefer clothing that can... activities without needing complete outfit changes. Are COOFANDY Shirts Becoming... moving away from overly formal and restrictive clothing in favor...

46 minutes ago, Torquer said: A couple times, I have seen men in kilts in the MDR.  I thought it was just fine, since it is considered formal attire in  Scotland. Once dined with a fellow who wore a complete cowboy outfit, including CHAPS to dinner.  Strange!

... announces her intentions with a formal declaration. There's no mystery. No ... bits of purple, "First, the outfit. Dark colors. They're slimming, sure, ... She gestured to her Achieve Men poster. "Everyone likes music, Yang. ...ride felt hours long. Yang's outfit suddenly felt out of place. ...combat boots and the gothic outfit into the duffle bag and ...even comment on her third outfit change of the day). The ...

... 4 gala evenings - one outfit can be worn all 4... are more formal than Caribbean cruises. Expect about 60% of men to wear...

... few actual guild members—grizzled men and women in weathered leather... accumulate women the way other men accumulated debts—involuntarily, inevitably, with... the high collar of her formal attire. Her breathing was shallow... muscles that the ridiculous host-club outfit left entirely, criminally exposed, descending... pressure points the way other men understood flattery. Leon, thankfully, was...

...for your style. Why Men Choose Silver Necklaces Silver ... It works well for men who prefer understated elegance while...thickness and texture, allowing men to create different fashion statements....and personality to an outfit. Many men choose pendants inspired by mythology...detail without overpowering the outfit. Formal Looks Silver necklaces can also ..., silver jewelry allows men to express themselves in a ...

... of modern designed clothes for men like casual shirts, formal shirts, Punjabi, yellow Punjabi, ...are attractive discounts on every outfit. There is a supply of ...and high quality clothes for men, boys and children, so customers ...kinds of modern designs for men. Here you can get high-quality ...all kinds of clothes for men, I went to this outlet ...bdt| 185 - 620 steem| |Formal Shirt | 1290 - 4490 bdt| ...

... looking down at his own outfit. "Grey and white are House ...forced to give Larys a formal apology, and Larys had accepted ... attention the longest, two men and two young boys. The ... like the other two men, except they both had deep ... castle. After some time, men who had carried the coffins ... for giants rather than men. Servants moved through the crowd ... of them, they were men of honor, and the realm ...

... bracelets, silver jewelry allows men to express personality, confidence,...Men often choose silver bracelets because they add sophistication without overpowering an outfit...look. Match Your Outfit Minimalist jewelry works best for formal settings, while larger... to elevate your outfit. Choose Meaningful Pieces Many men choose jewelry that...the best choices for modern men seeking style, individuality, and ...

... wearing Gyo'Oh's feathers in their formal attire, as Aras had done... metal armor sporadically throughout the outfit. A succubus, for she had... to mention how attracted to men he was." Themis used her ... and hair, who exclusively finds men attractive, right." Percell put her ... dressed in lava-lava alone for men, or with dudou tops for ...

... man who wore the signature outfit of the Driftwood Guild, and... a huge man in a formal black jacket and slacks with ... acknowledged before switching to a formal tone. "Thank you for hosting ... concubine multiple times, and his men have made attempts on carrying ... dealing with him. We're mostly men in our faction and we ...

... and shorts are my everyday outfit. (Hey, at least I “upgraded... if I have a “nicer” outfit than usual on, I just.... If I don’t think an outfit perfectly meshes together, I just... multiple/all styles into one outfit, I was thinking more of... kind who would appreciate the formal touch). If it feels ok... we're a bunch of fussy men having passionate arguments about socks...

... morning. In Madrid, three men in a car followed a...lawyer survived. Two of the men were subsequently identified as members ... his apartment block by men who knew his address and ...a collection of isolated angry men. It is a network, and...irrelevant. The PSP—Tierno Galván's outfit— is a separate splinter that ...is correct. Government demands: A formal provisional arrangement recognizing the Generalitat ...

...so I got the correct men. And it appears that ...was educated past formal and into secondary education. Formal was easy to...up his pharmacy. Unlike his outfit he usually wore, the ... it. Thus, his previous outfit needs a change to address...with his new choice of outfit. As for his mask, ...withdrawn even with his new outfit which he paid himself despite...Moreover, he gets a new outfit to boot in Atlas and ...

.... A transaction where both men benefited. Mark needed Davis ...matter. She needed an outfit that would work on both... said, his tone still formal but slightly softer. They all...faster. Every few minutes, the men switched positions. Mark was next...and harder as all the men fucked her. After a while... Sara obeyed. All three men stood over her, stroking their ...her goal. All the men rested, exhausted, on the sofa, ...

...you to change into the outfit. When you finally turned toward... Why were all the cosplaying men so absurdly muscular? Not just...disappeared. Then back at the outfit. Well. At least the day ... stepped straight out of a formal portrait and wandered into the ...— Frisk was wearing a maid outfit. Not just any maid outfit. One that bore a striking...here— Dressed in a maid outfit— Made the entire experience feel… ...

So, my Junior Banquet is coming up later this month, and prom in June, and as per usual, every single girl going to either event has been going mad about their dresses. My sister found this gorgeous dress at Kohls (white with long sleeves with purple flowers & vines embroidered on it-she truly looks like a literal goddess in it) and my mom is suprising her with this beautiful lavender and silver jewelry set to match it; one of my classmates found hers at a thrift store for like $7, my senior friend in my APES class is adding silk flowers all over her dress by hand...you get the idea. But, I've ONLY seen the girls going nuts over this. My one brother? We'll be lucky if we get him into a polo shirt & jeans. My other brother? He'll just grab the nice green button-down he wore to the Track & Field State Championships dinner & some dress pants the night of. The most serious outfit-planning I've seen from any guys at all is my brother's best friend trying to buy a tie to match his friend's dress for Senior Prom. And, for basically the entire female population at school, unless you were planning to match, it is a crime to wear the same color/style dress as someone else. Meanwhile, I'm willing to bet good money that 99% of the guys are going to be clones of each other, clothing-wise. And heaven forbid that a girl wears the same dress she did to another event. I can't help but wonder, how come there's so much to-do around what we wear, and not the guys? Don't get me wrong, I've been excited for Junior Banquet since Sophomore year, and I've spent hours scouring Amazon looking for the perfect dress, but if we're held to such a standard, why aren't the men too? (Personally, I would LOVE seeing a Junior Banquet or Prom where all the guys put in just as much effort as we ladies with colorful, detailed suits instead of the same white dress shirt + black suit jacket combo 500 times). And, I feel like there's so many more issues with clothing sizing & such for women; as a bigger person, I've noticed that there is so much more of a hassle finding dresses & such for me compared to my sister, who is much thinner. Actually, forget the dresses point-blank: What if a girl wanted to wear pants? What's up with dresses being the only acceptable norm? (This is one of the times I feel insanely jealous of nonbinary and/or androgynous people: Y'all get to wear literally whatever you want free of gender norms.). Am I the only one who feels this way? submitted by /u/Intelligent-Tap-4479 to r/Feminism [link] [comments]

Hey all, SD local here here just not into the ' fashion scene' I’ve got a few upcoming events and realized my current wardrobe (cargo pants + whatever clean-ish t-shirt I can find) is… not gonna cut it 😅 I’m trying to put together 3 outfits on a budget (~$400 total if possible): Beach formal vow renewal Wedding (more traditionally formal) Yacht party tied to the wedding I’m a 33M, 5’7”, ~150 lbs and not super fashion-forward, just trying to look put together and not feel out of place around my partner’s friends. Looking for: Stores in San Diego or TJ Affordable options (sales, outlets, hidden gems, thrift, etc.) Ideally pieces I can mix and match across all 3 events I’ve seen places like Nordstrom Rack, Macy’s, and Men’s Fashion Depot mentioned, but would love any specific locations, recent finds, or go-to spots you’ve had luck with. Current game plan (open to feedback): Thinking of doing a simple mix-and-match setup like: 1 lightweight blazer (linen or similar) 1–2 pairs of chinos (khaki + maybe navy/black) 2 button-down shirts (one white/light blue, one more casual) 1 pair of loafers Then styling it like: Beach formal: blazer + open collar shirt + khakis + loafers Wedding: blazer + buttoned shirt (maybe tie) + darker pants Yacht party: no blazer or more casual shirt + chinos + loafers From what I’m seeing, this could land somewhere around $200–$350 total at places like Old Navy/H&M/Nordstrom Rack, which seems doable—but not sure if I’m missing anything obvious. Also open to: “Buy this once, style it 3 ways” advice Tailor recs that won’t cost more than the clothes Appreciate any help 🙏 submitted by /u/ummmlife to r/sandiego [link] [comments]

Saw the f1 75 throwback posts and started getting flashbacks. Whoever chooses these guys outfits lets plz leave this trend back in 25 🙏 I acc can't take any of the drivers seriously when they dress like middle schoolers, especially when they're next to their impeccably dressed glammed up girlfriends. Men plz buy a pair of dress shoes for formal occasions and try to put in a little bit of effort, you will not regret it (see how good the Ferrari guys look?). Ts acc pisses me so bad for no reason😭✌️I don't know what I'm gonna do when Lewis retires and there is no one left on the grid with consistently good drip. submitted by /u/Illustrious_Page7810 to r/f1driverssnark [link] [comments]

This is a repost. The original was posted in /r/AITAH by user Glum-Chance-4225. I'm not the original poster. Status: Ongoing Editor's Note: Both OOP and his boyfriend are men. Original February 2, 2026 I do want actual fair judgement, so for full disclosure, I do not like this guy. I have never liked this guy. I've known him since I was a kid, and everything about him just annoys me. I don't think I outwardly express it, but he probably doesn't think he outwardly expresses how much he doesn't like me either, and he definitely does. I'm trying to be fair in the way I explain the situation, but he would probably tell a different story. I work at the same company as my boyfriend's dad. I don't work for him. He isn't my boss. He's above me in the hierarchy, but not directly. You have to got at a 45° angle to get to him from me. We still see each other often and work together sometimes, because that's just the nature of what we do. After my boyfriend and I first started dating officially he told me that when he told his dad about us he said "you can't date that guy. We work together." Okay, well, nobody needs your permission. He was never particularly nice to me before, but since then he glares at me whenever he sees me. I do my best to ignore him, but it's pretty unprofessional. Speaking of professionalism and lack thereof. I have been written up twice for tardiness. This isn't a huge deal. It isn't great. It means I probably won't get promoted this year. I am one of those people that think "I have plenty of time. I have plenty of time. Oh shit! I'm running late!" Like the time between doing good and running late doesn't exist. Yes, I know I have ADHD. My boyfriend, because he's awesome, has tried to help me in whatever way he can. He makes these breakfast burritos, freezes them, and puts one in the oven every morning while I'm getting ready. I take them to work with me and eat them during my commute or when I get to the office. Efficiency! This morning I was standing in the office, eating my burrito, loving life, when my boyfriend's dad saw me. This time, he not only glared at me, he said something. He said "you don't have to rub it in my face that you're dating my kid." I said "what are you talking about?" He said "I know my son made that." I didn't know what to say. I thought the situation was ridiculous. I was also annoyed at him for being such a baby about everything. I took another bite of my burrito. He scowled at me and then walked away. Normally my boyfriend is 100% on my side. When I tell him about the glaring he says it's not okay and immature. When I texted him about the burrito incident he said I shouldn't have taken another bite in front of him. He said that was antagonistic. Was it? I feel like his dad is a grown man and should get over it. Consensus: Not the asshole Notable Comment: NTA but you do lose some points for not dramatically dragging your tongue up the side of the burrito in the most overt, campy, performative way possible, thus making the father SO uncomfortable that he stops talking to you about his son at all ever again. Sending this comment to my boyfriend. [OOP] Comments by OOP: So this is what I think. My boyfriend says he's not homophobic but just had that middle-aged man with undiagnosed Asperger's thing going on. Fine, okay, maybe. That doesn't mean he's not also homophobic. I feel like (and I could be wrong, so feel free to tell me so) it's important we discuss these things as a couple. Because I am legitimately annoyed by his dad, and I can live with this low level constant annoyance, but I think it is important I keep him updated. If it ever gets worse and I need support from him, I don't want him to feel blindsided. I have so many stories. So when we were kids (me and my boyfriend, and this is obviously before we started dating) I was at his house and I decided to give his dog a dog treat. Should I have asked permission? Yes, of course. Was I just a kid who meant no narm? Also yes. He sees me putting the bag back and starts laying into me. I'm ruining the dog's training. The dog has been set back by months now. Who do I think I am? Why would I touch something that didn't belong to me? Dude. It's a dog treat. To be fair, he was also weird around his high school girlfriend. But it was different. My boyfriend claims it's not, but to me it is. He was awkward around her. He always seemed uncomfortable. With me it's hostility. According to my boyfriend he's not like that around his family and people he trusts. I can't prove that isn't true, but I have a hard time picturing him smiling. Yeah, that's definitely what it is. My boyfriend thinks he's just socially awkward. He is socially awkward, but this is more than that. He doesn't like the fact that his son is dating a man. I can't prove it, obviously, but c'mon. My boyfriend and I are both in our early twenties. His dad is, I don't know, Ben Franklin's former classmate? (Late fourties I think.) Yeah, we're both guys. [about making a formal complaint] I have really bad news about our HR department... [about who works in HR] His ex-girlfriend, who is also my best friend's stepmother. So she wouldn't want to get involved on either side. This place is actually the worst sometimes. Fun fact about my boss... He and my boyfriend's dad have been best friends for like thirty years. This whole town is so damn intertwined. It's a mess. It's a good job, but I would love to work with a bunch of strangers. I know the internet is very in favor of ending any relationship where either party isn't completely perfect, but us imperfect people also date, crazy enough. A lot of people would have (and have) dumped my ass for being lazy and having piss poor time management. My boyfriend instead said "I'll make you breakfast, maybe that will help." There's people in this world that are worth having annoying parents. Yeah, he's pretty great, sexy too. Definitely my favorite person. How OOPs Boyfriend makes the Burritos: Breakfast burrito recipe, courtesy of my boyfriend: Fill crockpot with water, put on high and add black beans (note, other beans can be substituted). Salt water to preference (note, salt is optional). Wait 12 hours, reduce heat to low. Wait six hours. Boil potatoes but not too much. Cut potatoes into cubes. Season cubes with salt, pepper, red pepper, garlic powder and onion powder. (Note, seasonings can be substituted or removed depending on taste.) Bake potatoe cubes. Chop tomatoes, onions and jalapenos. Mix together with small amount of salt and a squirt of lime juice. Strain beans. Add lime juice, garlic, onion, olive oil and red pepper. (Note, red pepper optional). Remove potatoes from oven. (Note, don't put hot potato cube in mouth.) Scramble eggs with salt, pepper and shredded pepperjack (Note, cheese can be substituted and is optional.) Warm tortillas in the cooling oven. Place potatoes in a line in the middle of the tortilla without going too close to the edge. Put salsa on top of potatoes. Add beans on top of salsa. Put eggs on top of beans. Fold tortilla from either side of line of ingredients. Then fold the other way. Tuck in flaps of tortilla and then roll. Roll into aluminum foil. Allow to cool and then freeze. Heat in oven when consumption desired. That's his recipe. I asked if there are any measurements of quantity or temperature or time or anything. He sent me the crying laughing emoji. I also asked if it wouldn't be easier just to use canned beans, and he said if he doesn't use the crockpot its feelings will be hurt. But there you go. Breakfast burrito. He makes them in batches. He makes like 12 at a time. So two weeks of breakfasts with two burritos to spare if any break or he wants to eat one. Update February 4, 2026, 2 days later Thank you for your support in my breakfast drama. That night my boyfriend read all the comments on my post. He decided to talk to his dad, which he has done in the past, but this would be a sterner conversation. For context, my boyfriend is big people pleaser. He loves to do things for other people. When his mom left he did all the domestic stuff at their house, cooking, cleaning, taking care of his little siblings. I actually think this dynamic was incredibly toxic, but that's not what this post is about. He doesn't like to fight with his dad or call his dad out on his bad behavior. His dad is the kind of guy who is used to other people managing his feelings for him, and he is shocked when people don't alter their behavior to suit his desires. My boyfriend went over to his dad's and asked him to please be nice to me moving forward because we really care about each other and are happy together. I didn't get the full play by play of the conversation, but it must have been productive! Fifteen minutes ago the dad walked up to me and invited me over for dinner or Friday! So my breakfast drama resulted in a dinner invite. Huzzah. Win. I'm sort of nervous to spend a whole meal with this guy, but I have to give it a shot. Thanks for all the advice and support. Here's hoping the dad isn't as homophobic as I thought and/or is willing to get over it for his kid. Comments by OOP: I think there will be at least some interrogating, and I will put up with it to an extent but draw boundaries where needed. I have some sympathy for him. He knew me as a snotty child, so it is probably hard for him to see me as an adult (even though we work together), so I will be sympathetic to a point, but only to a point. I'm actually impressed. I've known this guy for years, and I didn't think he was capable of compromise. I guess anyone can surprise you. I'm going to wear my most boring neutral outfit, so he knows I sincerely want to make a good impression. I think it's a little messed up to rely on your child to provide the domestic labor your spouse used to. "Oh my wife left me? No big deal. I'll just have this smaller version of her take care of the house while I date other women. Why should my lifestyle change at all? Better to push that disruption onto my kid." Am I crazy? Do you not see the inherently selfish mindset there? Update 2 February 8, 2026, 4 days lafter the last update and 6 after the first I wasn't going to update again, but I have to because these people are nuts. My boyfriend read all the comments on the first post, and they convinced him to talk to his dad. So do your stuff and convince him again. This dynamic is absolutely wild. So after the initial breakfast confrontation, my boyfriend talked to his dad, who extended an olive branch in the form of a Friday night dinner invitation. I was optimistic about this invitation. Friday afternoon my boyfriend says he is going to head out. I said isn't it kind of early for us to leave? He says he has to get there early to cook dinner and that he'll meet me there. I pointed out how crazy that is. Why is he cooking the dinner he was invited to at someone else's house? He said his dad doesn't know how to cook. This man is divorced. If he can't cook, what does he eat? My boyfriend said before we moved in together, he cooked. Now he thinks they eat a lot of takeout. So all of that is insane, but fine. If he's getting there early, I'm going with him. It makes no sense for us to drive separately. I'll help him cook. He says I shouldn't have to cook. Neither should he, but here we are. We drive over together, and his dad is annoyed. He said it was rude for me to show up early. I said I was going to help cook, and he looked annoyed. My boyfriend and I cooked together. That was actually fun. That was the best part of the night. At dinner itself his siblings had atrocious behavior. The youngest kid asked if my boyfriend was going to stay the night, and my boyfriend said no. The other brother said "why, because you have to go home and screw your boyfriend?" The dad actually told him off for that, so I will give him points for that, but what a low bar to clear. The sister was bratty too, but not as bad as the others. She was tolerable. The whole thing was so weird. When it was time to leave his dad glared at me more. The youngest brother hugged my boyfriend and wouldn't let go until his dad peeled him off. These kids literally act like their older brother is their mom. My boyfriend had to promise to come over the next day to get the kid to stop throwing a fit. When we were driving home my boyfriend said he thought dinner went really well. I asked if he didn't think his dad was a little cold? He said his dad is awkward around new people but is definitely warming up. I'm not new. We work together. He has known me since I was a kid. None of that counts apparently. The thing is, I don't remember these kids being so poorly behaved. I mentioned it to my boyfriend. He said they took it hard when his mom left. So, mom leaves. Dad does nothing. Younger kids lose their minds. My boyfriend becomes mom 2.0? That's not healthy. So that was dinner. Comments by OOP: [how long Boyfriend's mother is gone] Seven. Years. Way too long for the dad to still be acting like this. It's insanely weird. It's also beyond selfish. Instead of learning to take care of himself he just makes his kid do it? And he doesn't parent the younger kids? So they gradually become brats. He's screwed over all four kids. [on how the father isn't upset about his son dating a men, but because he lost his cook, nanny, and cleaner] That's pretty much exactly how it seemed to me. But hey, at least he isn't homophobic. Silver lining. I initially thought that 100% his dad is homophobic. But this dinner sort of convinced me that he isn't. He's just selfish and lazy. I think he might not actually be aware. I think he's so used to their selfishness and entitlement that it doesn't even register to him as inappropriate. I just don't understand what the dad thought would happen. Did he think my boyfriend would live there and take care of him forever? Actually, yeah. That's absolutely what he thought. That's 100% it. Those kids act like my boyfriend is their mother. It's so weird. The oldest of the little siblings is seventeen. He's too old to be as dependent as he is. No. No way. I think he should put limits on them. In my opinion he should tell them when he's available to visit and refuse to do anything beyond what works for him. Yeah, his ex-wife isn't dead. She lives in Buffalo. She left him. He did not murder her. I don't think he has the emotional depth to ever wish death on a person. I'm sure. My boyfriend visited her twice. Once shortly after his eighteenth birthday, and once right after his twenty-first. He says they have "a great relationship." It's crazy, because she talks to the kids in the phone, but she won't visit them because she refuses to enter the state we live in. The breakup was that bad. It's been seven years and she won't cross the state line. Meanwhile my boyfriend thinks it's totally normal and healthy to go seven years without seeing his mom more than twice because they "talk on the phone." Like that's remotely the same thing. Basically I'm "new" because the dad doesn't pay attention to his children's friends. So being around when we were kids didn't really "register" for him. And us working together has nothing to do with his personal life and so doesn't count. Brother 17, sister 14, youngest brother 10. No, they are spoiled and expect their brother to do everything. But I've never seen them without my boyfriend around. Maybe when he isn't there their dad does. I do chores. I'm not good at doing things in advance. If there are dishes in the sink, I'll wash them. I'm not great about making food though because by the time I'm hungry I don't want to wait until I'm done making food, and I don't think about it until I'm hungry. So he usually cooks. I'm not perfect, no, but I'm not helpless (or pretending to be helpless) like his dad. I sweep. I mop. I scrub toilets. I make the bed (but not right after scrubbing the toilet). Alright. Time to log off. It's been fun hanging out with all of you. Thanks for the input. I'm going to go wash my eyes out with bleach and then walk to the farmer's market. I'm not the original poster. submitted by /u/Schattenspringer to r/BORUpdates [link] [comments]

Whenever i wear formals it becomes messy like this after 2 hrs. Im skinny, dont have a tummy nor abs I normally have to alter all formals after buying yet it looks like this.Entha cheyyan pattunath? submitted by /u/Level_Carpenter_9380 to r/twentieskerala [link] [comments]

Hi all! Just thought I would share the outfit I wore earlier this month to my 🔺 F2F that got me my CJO 😊 There’s not a lot of inspo for men on here so here’s one to add the the pile. Things I made sure to do: - Got my suit TAILORED!! - Added small details like the pocket square (learned how to fold it like that and safety pinned it to make sure it stayed) + the tie clip - Choose a tie fold that works with your outfit. In my case, it was a double windsor. I wanted symmetry. - Matched my socks to the color of my suit pants (iykyk but this is a sign you truly know formal wear + since my suit was grey it stood out more and definitely showed the intention put into it) - Also, if you’re wearing a jacket, while standing have your buttons closed, when sitting unbutton the bottom one (those gradeschool etiquette classes really paid off here lol) Hope that helped. Ask me anything! submitted by /u/SnooOranges5788 to r/cabincrewcareers [link] [comments]

Going to a wedding this weekend and need advice. Could I wear —pictured outfit— to a “formal attire” wedding and get away with it. I’m a plus one and on somewhat of a budget. Thanks. submitted by /u/CivilChampion8183 to r/mensfashion [link] [comments]

I came here from r/weddingattireapproval because I was so irritated by some of the dress codes I’m seeing like this one here.I feel like I’m losing my mind. Men can’t wear white? I’m all for “beach cocktail” or “barn semi-formal”…that’s helpful, not insane. But when it starts to feel like the guests are just props or accessories, it’s too much. Anything hyper-specific that reads more like ‘match your outfit to our Pinterest board’… makes my blood boil. Not everyone has the money, time, or even physical ability to pull that off. What about people with real limitations? Mee-maw is 73 and has a bad hip. She’s now supposed to waddle into a store, find a soft, breathable lavender dress, and top it off with heels? Lmao, absolutely not. If the couple says something simple like “avoid fuchsia,” I love that!! it’s reasonable and helps me avoid matching with the bridesmaids. But when it gets to “please embody Venetian romance in soothing lavenders and pops of sunshine yellow”… come on. Guests are already taking time off work, buying plane tickets, paying for hotels, sitters, and gifts…now their outfits have to be curated to perfection too? It just feels tone-deaf when the world is on fire. People can’t afford houses, governments are making absurd decisions, and we’re all just trying to keep our heads above water. I can’t imagine demanding that level of control from my own guests. Is it just me? Anyone else feel this way? submitted by /u/retrozebra to r/weddingshaming [link] [comments]

This has been on my mind for a while and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Back when I was in college, our lecturers had a dress code. Female lecturers (many of them were quite young, in their 20s) HAD to wear sarees, while male lecturers just wore regular formal pants and shirts. I remember so many of the women lecturers complaining during the rainy season..... the saree would get soaked (esp being from the coastal part of india), it was hard to manage, and it took forever to drape, especially for those still getting used to wearing one. It just made me wonder....why is a saree considered formal wear for women, but men don’t have to wear anything traditional? Why is it formal for a woman to wear a saree, but formal for a man to just wear pants and a shirt? Why can’t women also just wear formal trousers and shirts if they prefer? Not jeans, just regular business formals. And if we’re insisting women wear traditional Indian outfits, then why not the same for men? Why aren’t they told to wear kurta pajamas or dhotis? Feels like a double standard, and I’m curious how many of you have experienced or thought about this too. submitted by /u/WillowPrevious5141 to r/AskIndianWomen [link] [comments]

TL;DR: Said yes to being a +1 for a wedding I wasn’t invited to. Just found out they expect guests to follow a pastel color palette and wear coordinated outfits. I backed out because I’m not spending money to dress like a beach-themed accessory. AITA? A few weeks ago, I begrudgingly agreed to be my friend Ethan’s +1 to a wedding for some guy we went to high school with (not someone I’ve kept in touch with or ever expected to see again). The wedding’s in early June—still about 3 weeks out—and it’s happening on some island off the coast of Massachusetts. We’re staying at a resort in Salem. I don’t love weddings, traveling without my own transportation stresses me out, and I was already pushing it by saying yes. This week, Ethan tells me we “have to go suit shopping.” I’m confused—why? I already own a black suit. I’m a +1, not part of the wedding party. Turns out the couple sent out a literal color palette for guests to dress in—pale grays, taupes, and soft pastels. They “encourage” everyone to stick to the scheme. No warning, no heads-up. Just a full-on vibe control memo like we’re extras on a movie set. Ethan wanted us in matching light gray suits with pastel blue or green ties. I’m sorry, but I wear black, navy, maroon… maybe beige if I’m feeling wild. That’s it. I’m not about to spend money on a pastel-tied suit for a wedding I wasn’t even actually invited to. I told him to cancel my +1 because I’m not going anymore. Now he’s annoyed, saying I’m bailing last minute and making him look bad because people were expecting me. He left me on read and said he would “talk to me when I was willing to be reasonable.” We’ve been friends since Freshman year of high school and have talked pretty much every day since (we’re 28 & 29 now). But like… I didn’t agree to be a prop in someone else’s wedding photo aesthetic. I’m a guest of a guest. The wedding is still 22 days out. Surely he can find another +1 who’s down to dress like a decorative macaron. AITA? Edit to clarify a few common questions: • No, Ethan and I are not dating. We’re just longtime friends—nothing romantic. • I mistakenly said “resort.” It’s actually a boutique hotel in Salem, not a full resort. Im not super keen on the details (obviously) and that’s my bad. • I found out about the color palette just yesterday (3 weeks before the wedding, 4 weeks after I agreed to go). Ethan admitted he knew about it earlier but didn’t bring it up because, quote, “I knew you’d be difficult about it.” • Renting a suit isn’t really an option because the color scheme is super specific, and I’m not interested in investing time or money into looking like a decorative macaron. They not only sent out exact colors to be worn, but advised on which store to get them from. • Why I agreed to go in the first place: I didn’t realize this would be a high school reunion vibe, and I thought Ethan might not know anyone else there. Now that I know he does—and seeing the whole vibe—I wouldn’t have said yes if I’d known upfront. • No, I don’t own a beige suit. I was just making a point that I stick to a pretty narrow range of clothing colors: black, navy, maroon, and yeah—maybe beige once in a blue moon. My current formal lineup is two black suits and a black tux. Appreciate the chaos and the feedback—y’all are as entertaining as you are opinionated. 🥂 Final Update – A Peace Treaty Was Signed Well Reddit, here’s how it ended up: Ethan and I talked it out like grown men (and best friends who occasionally gamble each other’s money). I explained where I was coming from, he explained why it mattered to him. Long story short: we found a middle ground. He covered the cost of the outfit and accommodations, and I agreed to show up as his +1. No drama, no hard feelings—just two idiots in coordinating suits trying to survive a beachfront wedding with pastel suggestions. Would I have chosen this on my own? Absolutely not. But sometimes friendship means sweating it out—literally and figuratively. And hey, at least the shoes are black. Thanks for the chaos, the judgments, the wardrobe advice, and the surprisingly passionate debates about dress codes. You’ve been wildly entertaining. submitted by /u/djsavoy to r/AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]

I am NOT the Original Poster. That is ThrowRA49594. She posted in r/AmItheAsshole and her own profile. Paragraph breaks added for readability. Do NOT comment on Original Posts. Latest update is over 7 days old. Mood Spoiler: shit hits the fan Original Post: February 4, 2025 Hello! Longtime lurker, first time poster here. I (25F) went to a friend’s wedding a few months ago. The friends are Matt (25M), and Susan (25F). We’re all part of a much larger friend group that gets along pretty great. To preface, I have actually never attended a wedding before in my life, and I don’t tend to dress up or put on makeup. Nothing against it, it’s just expensive and time consuming and I work 16-hour days in a uniform. I was really excited when I got the invite, saved up, and went to a shop I know carries my size (I’m fairly tall). The clerk was amazing and so helpful. He chose a selection of dresses that would be wedding appropriate that weren’t close to what the bridal party would be wearing and we had a lot of fun trying things on and he hyping me up. One of the options I just fell in love with. It was a beautiful dark green silk “bias-cut” dress (think Kiera Knightley in Atonement, without the sash and less of a flowing skirt). We matched it with heels and I’d never felt prettier. The dress was on sale too, so that was a plus! Wedding day comes and it’s lovely. I’m so happy for my friends. Susan ignores me, which is weird, but she’s busy preparing and then the wedding is in full swing and the reception is busy so I don’t think much of it. Everything goes off without a hitch and they drive off to their honeymoon. I suppose it’s relevant, but I received several compliments on my outfit during the event. I didn’t think it caused a scene, and it wasn’t anything particularly effusive or over the top. I was doing the same to others so I didn’t think it stood out. Everything concludes, we all have a nice time. No one says anything until tonight. We all got together for a “Welcome Back!” dinner for Matt and Susan. During the dinner Susan kept making snipes at me about what I wore, just incredibly passive aggressive. It was very clear she thought I overdressed. I didn’t say anything at the time because I felt terrible. None of my friends corrected or stopped her either. But looking back on it I feel… wronged? She didn’t give me the benefit of the doubt and I don’t feel like my dress was over-the-top. I do think I likely look very different from how I normally dress and present myself, so that might be part of it? I’m trying not to go over the word limit but am very open to questions and elaborations if needed. So Reddit, AITA? TLDR: wore a nice dress to a wedding, the bride is angry ever since. AITA? Some of OOP's Comments: Commenter: Info: Was there a stated dress code? OOP: The invite said “formal” and I knew it was going to first be in a church, and that the reception would be in a local hotel that looks like a castle and is quite fancy (though I’ve never been). Commenter: NTA. You're tall and you don't normally "girl-up". If the bride felt like you were trying to "steal thunder" it's likely due to her own insecurities. Your dress was appropriate for the event you were at, it's just that you probably were stunning and that may have shocked people who never look at you that way. Either way...not your problem. OOP: I was deliberately going for something very unadorned because she was wearing a ballgown with flower and rhinestone appliqué (I think that’s the term?). Her dress is a lovely dress, and the reception venue was PERFECT for it (effectively a castle). OOP's dress: I actually haven’t seen the movie, so I don’t know the intent, it was just the closest match I could find while googling trying to find the dress. I tried googling other dresses that looked similar, but most of them have a big thigh slit, which mine doesn’t. I just didn’t know how common “bias-cut” is as a descriptor while also being accurate to my dress. To another commenter: Pretty similar [to the Atonement dress] but a bit less (midback rather than lower back, which isn’t unusual for dresses to my understanding)? Also brought a simple black little jacket to wear with it since it was a winter wedding and we moved venues, but didn’t wear it the whole time understandably. Commenter: Bias-cut isn’t much of a description of a dress at all, it just means the material has been cut at an angle. OOP: Ah shoot then I don’t even know if that’s correct. That was my conclusion after consulting google trying to find the dress and then something close to it when that failed. Commenter (downvoted): The dress in attonement is pretty attention seeking. It was deliberately chosen in the movie and created a splash amongst viewers. So I'd say YTA. The wedding wasn't your moment. OOP: Very fair! It wasn’t my intent, but well could have been the impression and result. Were other women wearing cocktail dresses or gowns? OOP: About 50/50. I definitely wasn’t the only one. But I’d say the wedding was very male heavy, so 5 men per 1 woman I think. She had a huge bridal party so most of our mutual female friends were part of the bridal party (so I’m not counting their long dresses) or not invited. Commenter: I see a lot of american women wear short dresses to formal weddings which baffles me, formal to me means long dresses. Maybe thats why?? But if more women, other than the bridesmaids, wore long dresses and she isnt mad at anyone else but you… thats weird OOP: She’s not mad at anyone else that I’m aware of, but apparently some friends DID talk to her so she’s mad at them now Commenter: Hmm, interesting that it was a predominantly male attended event. Based on that plus the way she treated you it sounds like Susan is definitely not a girls' girl! OOP: I think that’s a multi-factor thing: Susan and Matt come from big families with mainly brothers. She’s not in contact with her mother. Our friend group is largely male and then on top of that some of our friends are gay so more men as a +1. I know she got in a fight though with some girls so she uninvited them to the wedding, and pretty much all the rest were bridesmaids. I’m not the closest with her, personally, so I was just happy to be there. To clarify the last bit: happy to be there versus being in the bridal party. We’re friends but not the closest as some of me and the other girls/guys are. Commenter: tbh, you went to a dress place and had the employee recommend dresses. Presumaly a qualified employee helping you pick out a dress would not have recommended a dress in which you would upstate the brid/which would be over the top for a wedding guest. OOP: I did show him what the bride was wearing and that we had to avoid reds (bridal party colour) so we wouldn’t have anything remotely similar. He was honestly a sweetheart. Not in a pushy salesman way but really hyping up and helpful. Commenter: exactly! You went to someone qualified to suggest appropriate options and showed him what the bridal party was wearing (and presumably told him the dress code was formal). It is this person's job to help people select appropriate wedding attire, and if he's at all experienced he'd know that some brides can get jealous and controlling. He would not have recommendd a bride upstaging dress. It seems to me like you did the appropriate thing. OOP: Yes and honestly the height was an issue. A lot of the shorter dresses are just too short on me and look indecent or just weird (not lying where they should) and it’s way easier to hem something than make something longer (not that this one needed hemming). You’d think it’d be the other way around when shopping for dresses but that hasn’t been in my experience. And yes omg he was so kind & lovely. Update Post: February 6, 2025 (2 days later, on OOP's Profile) So shit has hit the fan. Turns out: the dress didn’t matter at all, pretty much. Just brought some old shit up, I guess. Bear with me because I’m trying to piece things together and dealing/venting. Some info I’ve gotten directly, some secondhand, and not all at the same time. Got some from texting friends, others reached out, and I talked with Susan on the phone. Alright, so, apparently this is relevant: I come from a fairly abusive situation. Not the worst, but still not great. Add one some religious trauma and since a young age I’ve been pretty relationship averse (and do not date casually or hook up with folks) and a staunch atheist. Believe what you want to believe, that’s fine, but it’s not for me, yeah? How does this apply? Well, Matt (you might be getting a creeping suspicion at the root of the issue about now) is VERY Christian. Not an asshole about it, but he’s been very clear that’s the type of life he wants to live and he wants to be a pastor. So a FULL ON DECADE AGO, he asked me to a school dance - we didn’t know each other very well yet. I told him no because my parents didn’t let me go to those. He then asked if we could date and I gently turned him down because a) again my parents wouldn’t have allowed it, and b) I knew I didn’t want to live a religious life (I knew he was very religious). THIS WAS A DECADE AGO. We didn’t become friends or anything then (that came later because my best friend started to date one of the guys in the group, and our two friend circles merged). He dated people in between then as well, so like, a little awkward but rarely ever thought about it. We were 15! Time passes, he starts dating Susan. Susan and her friends join the group. Everything is fine! We get along okay, not the closest but good! There’s some drama but I’m not usually in it, and honestly I am really busy with Uni and work. Then just work. But apparently Matt told Susan that he had asked me out - no clue if he told her WHEN it was - and this DID bother her. I was oblivious. And yes, some of you were right. She is insecure, she also has anxiety. Matt, apparently, would get annoyed at her anxiousness when she’d call him crying, and in the moment would be supportive, but then after would compare her to me?! (WHY??) Things like, “Yeah, you should be like [OP], she doesn’t stress about things like that.” Like sorry, but I’m gonna be real with you here - getting followed by a creep on a train is VERY different when you’re 6’ and take martial arts, versus 5’01” WITH ANXIETY. Not fun either way, scary all the time, BUT CAN YOU BLAME HER FOR CRYING?? (Sorry I’m a little pissed). So I’m guessing she built up some sort of resentment towards me but never told me. Again, I’m oblivious to all this going on. Covid happens. He proposes. They wait a bit more for marriage. She invites people to the wedding and does not want me as part of the bridal party, which again, we’re not the closest so I’m unfazed. Maybe a bit of sadness, but her bridal party is large and with girls closer to her, so I don’t mind. My best friend is aware of some of the subtext going on here (because of her BF, the same guy mentioned earlier), so she doesn’t get along well with Susan, and have a fight (unrelated) around this time so Susan says she’s not invited and my friend doesn’t care, she’s going to be abroad then anyways. She also kicks some girls from the bridal party because they were apparently “talking shit.” about the relationship but I know very little about this (all third-hand). So from what I can get from the conversation I had with Susan is that she thinks me asking about what the bridal party and she were wearing was a dig, somehow. And that I chose green deliberately so that I’d stand out from the bridal party and her (her dress had red accents here and there) in the opposite colour. Again, didn’t ask me this, just came to that conclusion on her own. She also is utterly convinced that I dressed so nice because I wanted to “tempt” Matt, and I should have dressed more “modestly.” So I asked why this was all coming up now, and why not talk to me about it - I could have assured her that there was NEVER anything between Matt and I and never would be. This is where she tells me that DURING THEIR HONEYMOON he tells her that he’s having doubts, and feels like I was “the one that got away.” and needs to pray over their relationship. They haven’t separated or anything, but things have been tense and bad so when they had that dinner and she saw me again she was pissed - she didn’t say this directly but I think it’s pretty easy to infer. Now this didn’t come up in the call, but chronologically this happened shortly after I left the dinner - some of our friends texted her and then reached out to me, some talked to her directly. To the first person she talked to directly she started sl*t-shaming me pretty hard, but apparently in a way where she thought they’d agree with her, and when she didn’t she got pissed and has been really short with everyone after. At this point I tried to assure Susan that really nothing is there, I honestly have no clue what Matt’s on about and she just LOSES it. Starts screaming and swearing at me through the phone and crying and calling me really horrible things. I try to shut this down, but she cannot hear me she’s shouting so much. So I just hang up because wtf am I supposed to do with that. I send her a text saying that “Hey, I’m sorry you’re going through this, you don’t deserve to be treated this way, but I don’t deserve this treatment either. Whenever you are able to I’d like to have a respectful face to face conversation.” It shows read, but no answer. I have not contacted Matt, because honestly I’m a little freaked out and a lot pissed and don’t have a clue what to say and don’t really want to be near him atm. I don’t think this is over. I might update again when/if more happens because this was honestly really cathartic to write this all out. OOP's Comments: Commenter: They should just annul the wedding and go their separate ways OOP: Unfortunately they’ve passed the timeline where they could by a small margin. So they’d have to separate for a year, and then get divorced. And I don’t know if they would given that they’re quite religious, and while their denomination doesn’t disallow divorce it’s understandably quite against it. Especially if he wants to be a pastor. That said, I 100% agree. Commenter: NTA. When she's ready, definitely have that face to face conversation and explain that you were 15 when he asked you out! You were never the "one who got away" because you never dated and you were both teens! Also, please explain that you asked about the colors to ensure you wouldn't be matching the bridal party....which is a common question us women ask about weddings. Resssure her that you were only friends at a later date (after the teenage years) due to the friend groups overlapping, not because you sought him out, or he you. Explain, if given the chance, everything you've explained here and in your prior post. I definitely agree that you need to stay no contact with him, at least until they've figured everything out. You are definitely not the cause of their issues. It almost sounds like to me (with the info given) that he was settling, rather than finding that spark....especially given what he said to her on their honeymoon.....just, eww! Who says that to their new spouse?!?! If and when you have a face to face with her, tell her that you've chosen to go NC with him, or at the very least LC with him....but only if it's in a group setting and she's there. He sounds like he has some issues to work through.....we all do at times and that's ok. But what isn't ok is him comparing his new bride to other women. Again, this isn't your fault! You did nothing wrong. Please keep us updated OOP: Thanks for writing out this really thoughtful reply! Yeah, this is just. A wholeass mess. It’s left me feeling really gross, sad, creeped out and sad for Susan. I’m trying to figure out how long I should wait before reaching out to Susan again, let alone if really… like what the fuck can I do about this? Explanations are good but it doesn’t fix the core issue at hand. Ugh. Sorry, I hope this makes sense. This whole situation has just got me exhausted. submitted by /u/LucyAriaRose to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

if your 2025 goal is to shop local or choose more sustainable options for clothing, then this is the post for you! i've started compiling a list of local clothing brands ranging from casual to formal to activewear, including categories for shoes and bags. after perusing this forum (and r/fashionph) and finding not much information on local brands to support, i decided to start this list by listing down the brands often mentioned in these posts and including a link where to find them, along with a short blurb about the brand or what they sell. as always, consuming less or secondhand is always better, but should you find the need to purchase, maybe try out something from this list! everyday clothes Bench, Penshoppe, Bayo, Juana, Unica Hija, For Me, Kamiseta, Plains & Prints, Onesimus, Paperdolls, Lily & James, Peppermint - irl stores available. not listing these out since i’m hoping they’re quite well-known! Tayo Studios - irl stores available. ethical and inclusive clothing Candid Clothing - my personal first venture to sustainable clothing! relatively more affordable pieces Miu the Label - local everyday pieces Nin And Yang - multi-wear pieces (close to buying the Double Trouble jacket if the sizing is good Riotaso Clothing - repurposed clothing Vault 330 - handmade sustainable clothing with very cool designs Muni Muni Studio - ethical local fashion Wear Sundays Clothing - also available irl in Frankie General Store Beyond Collective Linya Linya - silly shirts Calle Lily - linen pieces Shop Nita PH - locally-made, produced in small batches, so cute! La Oceann - uses materials like bamboo, linen, and hemp. designed in the PH, not sure about production though Hanap Habi - woven clothes, currently on 2025 planning break tho HTP Clothing - locally made, relatively affordable!! June 12 The Label - custom-made clothing Laure By Roma - handmade and designed in the Philippines, mostly linen and silk Better Basics - uses deadstock fabrics, supports The Learning Lab (which trains seamstresses and tailors for livelihood) La Cocobabe - Davao-based Wear Laya - linen pieces Wanhiyan PH - linen pieces for under 1K (side note: i’m confused and fascinated with this brand as they only seem to sell one size of the design pero parang mejo malaki naman siya? like a more inclusive free size kasi bagay din naman ung oversized look sa model nila) BOCU - minimalist clothes, also has men’s clothing! Looks really nice and clean Project.ph - known for their katsa pieces! Also has events such as clothes swap parties, based in Tagaytay Lazy Fare - has physical stores, made with upcycled fabrics, mostly comfy and casual clothes Lambod - bespoke macrame clothes Owa Sylvia - made in a small factory in marikina Maligaya Clothing - repurposed linens and vintage fabrics Anyo Manila - promotes sustainability and has customizable options Anthill Fabric - one of the OG local and sustainable brands! Based in Cebu Sunki Label - sewn by Telastory, made by partner seamstresses. very transparent about their labor and sourcing practices!! Wear Anika - promotes slow fashion Suot Natin - oversized, genderless clothing !!! Proudrace - advocates for sustainability Syala Collections - sizes XS to 4XL available, wide variation in clothing, can provide your own size Dear Agatha - recommended for their corsets Nikocia - size inclusive (XS to 4XL) Zoie - sister company of Lily & James Strangemercy Bagasao formal wear/pricier Tygie PH - filipiniana pieces, available through Kultura of SM Department stores Yong Studios - ethereal pieces Rose and Bettys Creations - filipinana Balik Batik - woven pieces; occasionally available in pop-up stores Patis Tesoro - filipiniana and other handicrafts Abel Fiesta - filipinianas Yana's Woven Textile - handwoven textiles, makes formal wear, boleros, blazers etc. Suzy Clothing - so pretty, very fairytale-like pieces Details - modern Filipinana clothes, also has some unique office-appropriate pieces MarRo Studio - classic formal clothes, available in Landmark Alabang, Makati, and Trinoma Label Manila - classic and versatile pieces, runs a bit pricier but looks really nice! Unif0rm - unique pieces, ganda ng silhouettes Mosaic - has nine physical locations in Metro Manila but also available online Aer - claims to be made to last!! Monica Madrigal - made in the Philippines with handwoven fabrics Kawes by Manag Adjie - products made with Philippine weaves Ka_suotan_ - Filipiniana tops and dresses House of Enchante - Filipino version of Selkie, a brand known for their use of tulle and fluffy outfits Glorious Dias - vintage and reworked pieces Anyo - also sells home items Jenny Dresses - cocktail, formal, and semi-formal dresses, based in Rizal Apara - small-batch clothing Halo halo swimwear/exercise clothes Oja Wear - athleisure, free shipping nationwide Shop Easy Active - exercise clothes, swimwear Eighth Mermaid - modest swimwear, a personal fave

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/Lazy_Platform_9259 OOP Has since deleted their account Am I the asshole for asking my husband's best man to wear a tuxedo? Originally posted to r/AITA_WIBTA_PUBLIC TRIGGER WARNING: body shaming, manipulation, controlling behavior, bullying Original Post June 12, 2024 I (26F) am getting married to Mark(28m), a handsome, responsible, intelligent man with a kind heart and a great sense of humor. My sister Jennifer (23F) is going to be his "best man." Jennifer is best friends with my husband Mark (26m). He's known her more than twice as long as he's known me. We only really met and talked at any length about 3 years ago or so. They were co-workers together at her high school job, and she's been a part of his gaming group since then. They went to the same college, and they're coworkers again now working for his friend John's (42m) company. Mark was in college for the better part of a decade getting two undergraduate degrees and his PhD, and Jennifer ended up doing the same major as him, likely due to his encouragement. She's thinking about her masters in the same field, but they both work full-time now. In addition to being coworkers and playing dungeons and dragons together, they also game online, and they hang out all the time. They've gone to conventions together, either as part of a group, or just the two of them. They do local classes and events together, and Mark helps Jennifer with her photography and editing. While she has a solid full-time job she likes, Jennifer still has aspirations of being a model/influencer. She loves fashion, and she's also into cosplay. After we got engaged, we were at a family dinner, and I was talking to Mark about the wedding party, and I mentioned that even though I have two sisters, I wanted my own best friend Helen (26f) to be my maid of honor. Mark said that was great, because he actually wanted to ask Jennifer to be his best man. Jennifer immediately and enthusiastically agreed. Being a female best man is just the kind of thing She'd love. Obviously, even if that meant she wouldn't be one of my bridesmaids. She also knew that between our other sister and some of my friends I had too many people who needed to be bridesmaids and Mark was worried about being short on groomsmen. This was all fine and well until later on when we were talking about what people were going to wear. I picked out my dream wedding dress, and I coordinated the bridesmaid dresses, and Mark was going to have his groomsmen, most of which were other gaming buddies in tuxedos. I had to talk him out of putting them in cosplay/renfaire stuff. However, Jennifer was going to wear a dress. Jennifer is a very tall, very attractive woman, and to be perfectly frank, she has a large chest. The dress that she wants to wear was designed by one of her friends online, and while it's not white or anything (It's mostly red and black and pretty well matches the other groomsmen) And it's formal and fancy, it definitely shows off her figure. I wouldn't say in a slutty way at all, but it just does. She would also, as best woman, stand out from the other men on the groom's side, especially in the heels she wanted to wear with the dress. After dropping a few hints here and there and broaching the subject of each side of the wedding party matching and women's tuxedos, I gently requested that Mark have Jennifer wear a tuxedo rather than the dress and shoes she wanted and he had previously liked. When they gave me pushback, I pointed out to Jennifer that she might be too exposed or she might distract people with such a flashy dress. Jennifer gave me a dirty look and said, half under her breath, "are you fucking serious?" And before I could react, she just said "fine. Fuck it. You're the bride. I'll wear the fucking tuxedo." Mark sighed and half said some things about it being ridiculous, but then when I asked him what he said he just said, "Okay. It's whatever. It's fine." Since then, Mark and Jennifer have been passive aggressively making fun of my concerns, with them doing things like Mark comedy ogling her chest, or her making all sorts of boob jokes. She's done things like ostentatiously covering up her chest with her hands when she moves past people while saying things like, "gotta guard the girls, wouldn't want to knock anyone over". Both her and Mark keep making fake Freudian slips about her chest or her figure, and Jennifer even pretended to lose her balance and fall over because "her boobs were too heavy". They pretty much just do this when I'm around. They seem to think it's hilarious. They've made it very well known that Jen is really disappointed about not getting to wear the dress and that her seamstress friend is upset about it too, and Mark has seemed a bit distant and disinterested in wedding planning. I was looking over some tuxedos for women and making some suggestions to Jennifer, about ones that aren't too tight in the chest or hips, and she just showed me the one that She had already picked out and said, "is this fine, or did you want to further micromanage my specific tuxedo?" We started to get into a fight, and she accused me of being a bridezilla. When I told her she was being a bad sister, she said that she wasn't the one who was being body shamed and told what to wear. I told her My requests weren't body shaming, and she said that they were the same thing. My parents completely took Jennifer's side and said that I should just let her wear the dress. Obviously, she showed it to them too, and they thought it was beautiful. They like her friend too, and her friend has done clothing and costumes for / with her before. My father said that I should at least stop bothering her about the tuxedo if I'm going to make her wear one, and then I should just let her go with the one she picked. The one she wants though is very high visual impact and it is also very tailored. She said she can match it to the colors but I feel like she'd still stand out. When I tried to get Mark to weigh in on this, he just said, "It's your wedding, do whatever you want. I guess I'll tell her to do whatever you want." And I obviously don't feel like he's very invested. I feel like he's not on the same page but he just doesn't want to argue. He's always like that. Even though we both have good jobs, both Jennifer and I still live at home with our parents, because housing is ridiculous, and it's been awkward around each other. I've been staying over at Mark's a lot over the last year, and I was supposed to be officially moving in, but he's been kind of cool and passive about it recently. Everyone seems to be acting like I'm the asshole here, even though Mark and Jennifer are the ones being passive aggressive and unreasonable. I almost feel I should have just made Jennifer a bridesmaid right off the bat or told Mark that it didn't make sense for him to have female groomsmen. Am I the asshole for wanting my husband's "best man" to just wear a normal tuxedo? Update June 19, 2024 There is not going to be a wedding. John (42m), of all people, Mark's (28m) boss and gaming buddy noticed my(26f) post, as it got way, way more attention than I ever expected. We've only ever met a couple of times and hardly ever talked before, but he reached out to me with,"This is "John" lol call me". So I called him from the parking lot after work. John says he’s been married for about 20 years, and he's tried to give Mark relationship advice. He doesn't think we're a good match. He told me that I should talk to Mark and that Mark has been unhappy with our relationship and extremely unhappy with the wedding planning, even to the point that it's a running gag amongst him and his friends. I got into it a bit with John, because to be fair to me, Mark's ideas have been ridiculous. Just some of the things he asked for, and which John, Jennifer(23f), and his buddies thought would be "Cool", He wanted the wedding party to have custom swords/daggers and amulets. He wanted them to have the swords during the ceremony and he thought people would like fantasy amulets. Mark had told me that John was willing to pay for the bridesmaid dresses if we had them done by Jennifer's costumer friend. I told him no, because I wanted normal, nice bridesmaids dresses from someplace reputable and that the bridesmaids could buy them themselves. John told me that he had offered this as a bit of a bet with Mark. Mark wanted to serve mead at the wedding, he said that his friend, John, could provide it and that he made mead in his basement and had tons of it. I obviously said No, because why would I want mead at my wedding, never mind some guys' basement mead? John got a laugh out of this at the time, and talking to me, because he's a nerd who likes to laugh at his own jokes. Apparently, he's very proud of his "basement mead", and They like to make toasts with it. "Basement mead" has apparently become a running gag in their games, as John insisted on telling me. Frankly, John seemed kind of tickled with himself just because he was speaking with me. Mark wanted the band at the wedding to play classical covers of video game and superhero music. Mark wanted the reception to have a "jester" who would wander around doing magic tricks and asking people riddles. Some lady that Mark and his friends know asked if she could be an elf at our wedding and wear her "forest gown", and Mark said he'd ask me and He described it as some kind of green Greek toga dress with leaves and elven writing on it, and that she'd have elf ears. It's a wedding not a costume party, so I don't even know why he would ask that. I mentioned this stuff to John, and he recognized all of it and some more things to add besides, because Mark would always vent to them about the wedding plans, and John just agreed along saying that I was constantly shooting down all of Mark's ideas. The point is that all of Mark's ideas were completely ridiculous, and that I wanted to have a wedding and not a Halloween party. John laughed when I brought this up to him and said that these ideas were "awesome" And thatI was just being “too boring”. John said that he thought we weren't a good match, and that he's told Mark that he needs to talk to me. I asked him if he thought Mark and Jennifer were a good match, and he just said yes. I asked if there had been anything between them, and he said no. He said he's "100% certain" they've never hooked up, because, "Mark doesn't have the poker face for it," especially with as much as him and the other group members rib them over it. He said that Mark is too oblivious for his own good and that the week after her 18th birthday Jennifer said, pretty much straight to Mark, "I'm 18, so you can fuck me now," and Mark just laughed it off as a joke. It does sound like something she’d say because Jennifer does love making inappropriate sexual jokes. John thought there was more to it though. They've had their characters date each other in games. He said they've been “the very model of chastity” since Mark has been dating me. Once at an event Jennifer was supposed to kiss Mark, but instead she kissed the palm of her hand and then had him kiss her palm. John is fully confident that neither of them would cheat. I went over to Mark's house, because he hadn't called or texted in a while, and he basically confirmed everything John said. Mark said that I "stressed him out" when I was over, and he wasn't sure about me moving in because thinking about it gave him anxiety. He didn't like any of my ideas for our house (It was his childhood home, and he's resistant to changing anything. He just has his stuff everywhere and wherever. He kept trying to talk about giving me "some rooms" or "some space" when it's supposed to be "our" home where all of the space belongs to both of us) He was extremely frustrated about the wedding planning and he felt like He didn't have a say. He said the dress Jennifer wanted to wear was just about the final straw because I told him he could pick the outfits for the groomsmen and I told him Jenn could be in a dress as long as it matched. She really loves the dress, and she got it from her friend, She and John and apparently all of his buddies warned him that I'd "find some way to have a problem with it". He says that I "talk him in circles" Whenever he tries to choose or change anything, even though all of his suggestions are ridiculous. And he said he'd just about given up caring by the time I complained about the dress, so he didn't bother fighting about it. He said it upset him the way I was "body shaming Jennifer about her figure and her breasts". He thought I was being jealous and controlling, and that I had been a bridezilla ever since he proposed. When I asked him why he even proposed, if I apparently give him anxiety and he doesn't even want me to move in with him, he said he felt like he was pressured to either propose or break up, and he hoped things would get better and that he didn't know if he had a good enough reason to break up. When I told him that I never pressured him to propose, he said that all of my friends and family know that I consider it a goal to get married before I'm 30, and he brought up a document on his phone where he had taken notes about what kind of proposal I wanted from all the times I had talked about it. He said that he started the document because of how obviously important it was to me to have a perfect proposal and how often I talked about what I wanted. He proposed because he felt like he had to either marry me or dump me if, "I was going to have time for my plans". I don't think there's anything wrong with having a timeline for your life, and I wanted to start having kids by my late 20s or early 30s at the latest. I mentioned all of this to Mark again, and he said that that was fine, for me, but that he was kind of on the fence about if/when to have kids, and he mentioned that Jennifer isn't sure about having kids at all and certainly isn't in any hurry about them, but I told him that doesn't have anything to do with anything and that Jennifer is just being shortsighted. I asked him if anything had happened between him and Jennifer, and he said no, and I believe him. I asked him why he wasn't dating Jennifer, and he said that at first she was too young, and then he was seeing someone, and then he was dating me, and he said that he values his friendship with her more than anything. He said that his friendship with Jennifer was "worth not getting to be with her that way", and that she's too attractive to want to be with him. Apparently, the only reason Mark even started dating me is because he tried flirting with me at a family party we were at, and he said I seemed into him. He doesn't think of himself as handsome, but he is, and He's got his PhD, a great job, and his own house at 28. He's definitely a catch. He didn't agree And he said he's only ever dated his high school prom date, a girl who was kind of his girlfriend until she graduated and left, and me. Mark apologized and said that he wanted to put a hold on any more wedding or moving plans, and that he wasn't sure about the relationship. I had already started crying, but then I broke down and he apologized again. He said he was "sorry for messing up my plans" And that he kept hoping things would get better. I left as soon as I felt like I could drive. By the time I got home, Mark had already texted Jenn "your sister is crying. Sorry" and the two of them had been on the phone the whole time, And of course my mom knew And she tried to comfort me but I could just tell she wanted to say I told you so, because she had been warning me I was going to drive Mark away, and she thought he was better with Jennifer too. Jennifer said that she tried really hard to have this work out, because she just wants Mark to be happy and that she had tried inviting me to gaming and for Christmas before last she bought me a switch with games Mark likes and that she was sorry stuff happened this way. She accused me of not really liking or caring about Mark and just wanting a "generic husband". When I told her that wasn't fair she mentioned the same stuff from the wedding planning and a bunch of other stuff from our relationship that she said made Mark feel ignored or suffocated. She said that the only reason I liked him was because he ticked boxes and always gave in and let me have my way. We started arguing, but our mom stepped in before we could get into it too bad. I asked Jennifer about what this meant for her and Mark and she said he is absolutely her best friend and nothing is ever going to change that and that she loves him. When I asked how she loves him she just said that's not a discussion she wants to have right now. Our mom said everyone needed to cool off and that was enough for Jenn to step away and drop the subject. One of the commenters on my original post asked why I was “marrying my sister's boyfriend”, and my mom asked very nearly the same thing. She questioned how I had started dating Mark just about as soon as his age gap with Jennifer stopped being awkward and she implied I shouldn't have been dating him in the first place. That's not fair at all. It's not like he's her property, and Jennifer can clearly just go get whatever man she wants. It's not like she had any kind of claim on a man just for knowing him. Even while she was trying to comfort me and saying that things will be alright, my mom wouldn’t stop implying that I was wrong for going after Mark in the first place or criticizing me for how the relationship went. She said that Mark wasn’t the man for me, and I could tell she meant that he belonged with someone like Jennifer, as if I’m not good enough or what I want doesn’t matter. And then I caught her talking to Jen about how things should be fine and how *she* should try not to be to mad at *me* as if I was the one in the wrong or I should be apologizing to her. Jennifer just kind of went on like normal and went ahead and went to go game with Mark and her friends the next day. I know they've been chatting online like normal. I gave Jennifer Mark's ring to give back to him, And then I had a missed call from him while I was in the shower and a text that said, "Okay. I guess we are broken up then. I'm sorry." I don't know if I messed this up or if everyone else were the assholes here. Sorry this was so long. A lot of stuff has come out. I feel like I'm definitely not going to get married by the time I'm 30. THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7 submitted by /u/Direct-Caterpillar77 to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

When I was younger, I used to think it was unfair that women's formal wear had more variety and colour than the boring, stuffy, monochrome suits that men have to wear. But it wasn't as though I really wanted to wear a dress, and even since getting into RR, I've not been that big into crossdressing (for myself, anyway, but women in tuxes do things for me). I'm not big on the word 'slutty', given its connotations, but it's a shorthand way of getting what I'm asking for across - what outfits for men that don't involve crossdressing look good whilst showing off a bit of skin? I'm not yet confident enough to try it out, but I want to have some ideas in mind... Also, for RR men, what clothing do you like on women? As well as tuxes and waistcoats, I have a weakness for flannel shirts and overalls. submitted by /u/PoorMetonym to r/RoleReversal [link] [comments]

I am NOT OP. Original post by u/insanepeopleonfb in r/ChoosingBeggars ​ Note - ORIGINAL POST + UPDATES made on Facebook and screenshots were posted on Reddit ​ ORIGINAL POST - Screenshot From FB - 5th Dec 2018 Hey everyone! Who's ready for Hawaii 2019? In anticipation of the wedding, and believe me, I know it's a longgg way away...but... I would still like to announce the dress code! I am giving you a long notice of a year and a half so that you will have time to find and pick out something nice. The dress code is very specific because it will be used to create an incredible visual effect. If done right, it will make our synchronized dancing along the [redacted] beach really pop. SO, without further adoo.. WOMEN (100-160 LBS) GREEN Velvet Sweater ORANGE Suede Pants Loubotin heels (the famous RED heeled shoes. when we spin and lift our feet, the effect will amaze you) Burberry Scarf MEN (100-200 LBS) PURPLE Fuzzy Jacket Soda Hat All White Trainers Plain Glow Sticks WOMEN (160 LBS +) All BLACK sweater and pants. Any material. BLACK heels MEN (200 LBS+) All CAMOFLAGE BLACK sneakers CHILDREN RED from head to toe. Remember the kids will form the shape of a heart, it needs to be true red not blood orange or some bullshit! Additionally, we will require that you wear formal attire after the dancing has ended. Please bring a change of clothing. Remember, the venue is extremely upscale, and we want to be looking our absolute BEST ladies and gents please, if you look like trash, so will we. All jokes aside, we want you to invest in an outfit valued at at least $1,000. This includes jewlery, accessories, makeup, and hair. Remember ladies and gents, this wedding is 24k themed for a reason. You have a year and a half to get working. No excuses! Mwah ​ Comment by u/RatherBeYachting - Has anyone considered how awful this color scheme is? I had a hard time picturing this shit in my head so I made a very low effort paint mock-up. Edit: I totally skipped over the Burberry scarf and the glow sticks. What kind of monster makes people wear a Burberry scarf in Hawaii? ​ UPDATE - Screenshot From FB -1 - 5th Dec 2018 ..Hello Invitees! .. A VERY Important Update. Please read. It has come to my attention that someone went all the way down in this groups creation to screenshot the dress code requirements. The screenshot was taken wildly out of context and has gone semi viral on Facebook and Reddit. I have seen MY POST twice on my regular Facebook account. I could not be more crushed, betrayed, or saddened. I trust each and every one of you so intimately. Knowing someone went behind my back and made fun of me is one of the worst feelings everywhere. And boy, will you be paying. Therefore, I am announcing one of the most unique parties you will ever be invited to in your life (besides my actual wedding.) In honor of the snitch who sold me out, I will be hosting the first ever Polygraph Party at my house, this Saturday at 8:00PM. Bring your inner Sherlock Holmes because we will be hunting out the snitch who put me on blast. You think I'm kidding? I'm not. We just bought a real polygraph test for $99 on Amazon. After the testing is over and we find the rat who did this, we will all celebrate with drinks and appetizers. If you can't make it to the Polygraph Party, you will be presumed guilty unless you can provide a valid excuse. We can make this party a unique and good one that will be told for years to come. I promise, as long as you're innocent, you have nothing to worry about. I highly suggest whoever did this just tell me. I won't retaliate, I will simply cut all ties and communication with you (and talk shit about you for a long, long, time.) If you have any information about who violated my trust and my wedding planning, I will give you $100. Next-- if any of you are unhappy with the dress code requirements, it's okay! You can come talk to me .. Instead of participating in the dance, you can help the crew clean up after dinner, volunteer to take videos of our dance, or even contribute to the honeymoon. Anything counts... Finally, I am outraged at the comments these internet trolls have made about the dress code. DO YOU FUCKING KNOW ME? DO YOU KNOW WHY WE ARE DOING THINGS THIS WAY? No??? Then shut up! Go back down to your scum basement and play video games and never fucking make comments about people you don't know. My husband and I are certified spiritual healers with over ten years of experience. You all know this. Our wedding colors, fabrics, and intimate synchronized dance are something we hold very dear to our hearts. The expensive clothing represents the riches we wish to come. The black and camouflage outfits represents the aura of the devil that we must shoo away. The soda hats represent our wishes for an abundance of life saving liquid. You get the picture. We met at a psychic's desensitization chamber over 12 years ago in Italy, as you all know. Why not bring our traditions and beliefs into our wedding? Would you show up at an Indian persons wedding and make fun of their culture and their tradition? If not, don't judge ours. Anyway, I am so tired having to explain myself over and over. Please keep me updated. ​ UPDATE - Screenshot From FB - 2 - 12th December 2018 Polygraph Party Results-- Many of y'all have been asking how Saturday's Polygraph Party went. It was fantastic. Attendance was 100%. The $99 Polygraph machine from Amazon was a bit shitty, but it did the job. I asked y'all simple questions such as "did you leak my dress code to the internet?" and "do you secretly hate me?" Friends, it is with only the deepest joy that I can announce the identification of the snitch. My former friend, Stephanie, was immediately removed from my property. She confessed to leaking my posts and ridiculing me online. My original dress code has gone viral because of her AND THE OUTSIDE WORLD WILL NEVER FUCKING UNDERSTAND THANKS TO STEPHANIE. Good riddance!! Now the Hawaii 2019 wedding can go on! Thank you to my best friends Lynn, Jackie, Kristie, and Jax. You were very helpful in allowing me to set up my Polygraph text and eliminate the snitch, Stephanie. Dress Code Update: PLEASE buy your soda hats ASAP. We will be hosting another event in a few weeks in which we will be modifying them. IF you would prefer a helicopter hat, by all means, go buy one. Time is of the essence. Ladies, let me be CLEAR. Your secondary outfit MUST total at least 1k. We are 24k themed after all. Please submit photos of your synchronized dancing outfits no later than ONE MONTH. I will be telling each and every one of you what is wrong and how to improve it. ​ ETA - u/CrushMyCamel added additional Info in the comments There is so much to love. EDIT: one of the guests responded lol EDIT 2: hahahaha here we go - Outfit Example EDIT: According to the same source this is the polygraph she ordered. ​ Reminder - I am not the original poster. submitted by /u/Mist0fCapricorn to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

I hate traditional western dress clothes for men. Choosing an outfit to wear to a formal/semi-formal wedding is always a struggle for me. I absolutely love the look of sherwani, though! I feel great wearing clothes like this—confident and cool and all the ways that stylish suits are supposedly meant to make you feel. But I’m a normal white guy. My wife thinks it would be tone-deaf and an act of cultural appropriation for me to wear an outfit like this to our friend’s wedding. The dress code for the wedding itself is something like “fashionably formal”… they’re cool people and I’m sure plenty of folks will show up strutting their stuff with a little more flare than you’d expect to see at a run-of-the-mill wedding. I have the utmost respect for Indian culture, and by no means seek to mock anyone. I don’t think of this as a “costume” or anything like that. I just think that westerners get a lot of things wrong, and men’s dress fashion is one of those areas. Sherwani look great, feel great, and are in my honest opinion just a superior look compared to a normal suit. But am I being tone-deaf and insensitive? Or, will I at best give the impression that I’m some dumb wannabe-enlightened tech bro who thinks he’s so evolved that he transcends cultural norms? Am I the a**hole? submitted by /u/ketchupaintreal to r/OUTFITS [link] [comments]

I am not the original poster. That was u/Uninvited_1011, but she has since deleted her account. She posted in r/AmItheAsshole. Another Florida Man story to cover up spoilers. On March 13, 2019, a Florida Man in a Spider-Man mask stole liquor from a liquor store. He was caught because he walked in first without the mask on, revealing his face. He left, went to a second hand store, bought the mask, and returned to steal. Trigger Warning: OOP mentions an eating disorder in her comments Mood Spoiler: honestly don't know what to put but nothing terrible happens Original Post: March 13, 2023 My (29F) friend Kate (28) has a boyfriend, Jamie (29), whom she has been with for nearly 3 years. We met Jamie on a night out, and I would say that although he's Kate's bf I consider him a friend. We share an interest in a particular sport that we text about sometimes and if I have a spare hospitality ticket to one of the sporting fixtures, I will sometimes invite Jamie to go. Jamie's 30th is coming up and Jamie and Kate planned a big party, and I peripherally helped out with logistics when asked. A few days ago, Kate texted me. She asked if I wouldn't mind "toning down" my look for the party, and if I could send her a picture of what I was planning to wear. I asked her what this meant and after asking several times if she "really had to say it" she asked if I could dress (verbatim) "basically what [I] would consider frumpy" because she really didn't want to be outshone at her own boyfriend's birthday party. When I didn't reply right away she went on to say that she wanted Jamie's full attention that night, which she wouldn't get if I showed up dressed properly. I was a bit annoyed by what she was implying so I said if I was going to be so much of a concern for her, I'd rather just politely decline the invitation. Kate freaked out saying I was being immature by not coming just because I couldn't steal the spotlight. I said it wasn't about that, it was about her making me responsible for whether or not I draw her boyfriend's attention, which is something I've never tried to do nor done as far as I'm aware. She then said it was really important to Jamie that she stand out because his friends and colleagues would be there. I just told her that again, if she was so worried I was going to be distracting everyone, I'd rather not come than feel humiliated from now until the event. I said I would send her Jamie's gift and she could tell him why I wasn't coming. I guess she didn't tell him the reason because Jamie messaged me saying he knows I'm "booked" the night of the party but he'd really like it if I could be there, and asked if I could reorganise so I could come. I hadn't replied, but I got a message from Kate saying she knows Jamie is trying to get me to come and please could I just put my pride aside and come to the party. I asked if she was going to ditch the outfit policing, but she said no, so I said I would not be coming. She didn't reply, but I've since received a couple of texts from mutual friends saying that while her request is ridiculous, Kate is aware of that, she's just desperate to be seen a certain way and even if it's pathetic I would probably feel the same way in her shoes. Other friends I've told (who don't know Kate) say I should not bow to the pressure and that she's nuts for even asking, and I don't disagree, but also I feel bad skipping the party when it's Jamie's birthday and he asked specifically that I come. So, should I be going? Relevant Comments: Info: I know this is probably gonna sound bad but how good are you two looking compared to each other? OOP: "Lol this is the world's most uncomfortable and unfair question that absolutely needs to be answered really. I am considered more conventionally attractive than Kate, and have been since we were in school. I will say, over the years, I've had certain enhancements so the way I look now is not entirely natural so is probably not a fair comparison anyway, but of the two of us I've always received more male attention. I obviously don't think male attention is the goal or be all end all of life, but I can admit it might be a factor in Kate's thinking here." Are you and Jamie (the fiancé) actually friends? "Yeah, we're really friends. I'm married, so even if he was single, I wouldn't be. And even if we were both single, he wouldn't be my type, and I've known Kate long enough that she should know that." Is your husband going to the party? "He will be travelling for work. But even if he was home, he has an incredibly demanding job and after a 17 hour work day the last thing he wants to do is go to party, especially with people he doesn't really mesh with. I don't blame him haha it's not his vibe." Any chance Jamie is into you? "I really hope not. I was with my husband the night we met Jamie. He actually came over with his boss who was trying to hit on me lol. That was be crazy if he had liked me from then knowing I was taken." "I don't think he's into me, he's never given me reason to think he is. That said, I probably wouldn't know because why would he even hint at that if it were the case. Kate has never said he is, he's never said he is, so I'm going to presume that's not the case." Lots of questions about how OOP dresses, etc. "I don't generally wear overly revealing clothing if that's what you mean. I take a lot of pride in the way I look, which includes being dressed well and appropriately for every occasion. I was never planning on showing up to the party in a latex cut out dress lol." "Nobody has ever felt the need to discuss my outfits with me before. I attend/host one formal/semi formal event a week on average, often more in summer, I work with a stylist to make sure I'm always dressed appropriately, and no one has ever said anything negative about the way I present myself. Jamie's party is semi-formal. I know because I helped them book the venue." Why can't she wear something toned down? "It's not that it would kill me, but a) I don't know what "tone it down" means. I own the clothes I own, they fit how they fit, and thanks in no small part to a boatload of aestheticians, my face and body are what they are, I'm genuinely not sure what she wants me to do, and b) she didn't say "a little" she said "frumpy" which to me means she wants to pointedly underdress for the event, which is fundamentally embarrassing and in my opinion quite rude to show up to an event purposely not being mindful of how formal it is. So no, it wouldn't kill me, but it would make me stand out, just not in a positive way." People question why she texts Jamie and/or is his friend: "Why am I texting him? Because we have a mutual interest, and since we met we've talked about that interest. I invite Jamie (maybe twice a year, not often) because my husband buys me "all access" type tickets for sporting fixtures and sometimes ends up not being able to go, and Jamie is the only other person I know who enjoys the sport, and I know he doesn't get the opportunity to go. Kate really doesn't like the sport, and when I've asked her if it's okay to invite Jamie she's always been enthusiastic about it. For his birthday, I did give them a pair of passes for one of the events, and all she did when I told her I'd send them was to complain that I got him a nicer gift than her. If Kate or Jamie has an issue with the boundary then I think it's fair to say it's their responsibility to communicate that." OOP is voted NTA Update Post: March 21, 2023 (A week later) First of all, thank to everyone for the advice. Most responses were not what I was expecting and really gave me a lot to think about. As surprised as I was that so many people said to tell Jamie, I did realise it was the right thing to do. So, I texted him and told him that Kate was insisting I dressed a certain way. Jamie called and explained. A couple of months ago, Jamie and Kate were out with a few of his friends (these same friends that I mentioned in my comments are not fond of Kate), and everyone had had a lot to drink. They were talking about how they met their SOs, and the story of Jamie and Kate meeting came up. Apparently during the telling of the story Kate asked Jamie why he had decided to hit on her rather than me, and one of his friends joked that it was because he knew he didn't have a shot with "the hot one" - me. Kate asked if this was true, and Jamie having had WAY too much to drink, explained in a way that made it sound kind of true. He said he did notice me that night and thought I was attractive, just seeing me. He said he would never have approached me because he knew he would never have a chance with someone like me, so in that way, his friend was right. He said that speaking to Kate was the absolute best outcome because he loves her and plans on spending the rest of his life with her, but even knowing this, Kate has taken this extremely hard, and even though she says she is over it, he's noticed changes in her behaviour that seem to be related to that. He also admitted that he'd been planning to propose to Kate at the party and that is why he'd wanted me to be there, but after hearing this on top of the way she has been handling the situation previously, he won't be doing that anymore. After speaking to Jamie, I called Kate. She admitted that she had tied a lot of her self worth in the fact that she'd finally been picked over me and now it felt like that wasn't true. She apologised for trying to solve her insecurities through me, but also said she wasn't sure she would be able to have me in her life as much as I had been with the way she's been feeling. As hurt as I was, I said I understood. She said she still wanted me to come to the party, since I'd helped organise it and she obviously dropped the absurd dress code, so I will be going to the party. I trust that Kate will communicate her boundaries to Jamie but I don't plan on inviting him to any more events for the foreseeable future. I'm really sad that I've probably lost a longtime friend over the drunken awkwardness of other people, but I also get that Kate can't help how she feels, and frankly it's for the best not to be in a secret competition. So, yeah, I'm hurt, but I'm going to the party. Not a satisfying update, but an honest one. UPDATE: (Same Day, Same Post) Going through these comments has actually brought up a couple of memories that have, in hindsight, made me a bit uncomfortable, and I actually don’t think I will end up going to this party. As much as the mutual friends will have questions and I don’t know how much of the truth I will end up telling, I feel too weird right now to continue to be involved in this situation. Relevant Comments: (OOP had a lot of comments with lots of info, but I tried to keep it as concise as possible) More info on the boss hitting on her situation: "I don't know if he did, but his boss came over and paid for our drinks and was very full on with hitting on me, and he introduced Jamie in a very much "and this is my friend" type way. I don't know if he'd have come over to talk to Kate but he said point blank he would never have come over to talk to me." People comment that it comes across like she's thinking highly of her own beauty in comparison: "I'm pretty sure most people have been seen across a room by someone and that person has thought they were attractive. That happens to the vast majority of people at one point or another. My point is, you almost never end up with those people because in the end, that's not what matters." "I'm "the hot one" in the relative bubble of this group of people. I have a friend group where I'm not "the hot one". I am aware I'm generally considered good looking but I'm definitely not just "the hot one" in any given situation. And it is a shame people care so much about looks, especially where women are concerned. Just because I happen to acknowledge that I benefit from that, it doesn't mean I think it's a nice thing. Short of taking some kind of militant stance and disfiguring myself, I can't do anything about people thinking I'm attractive. But I also make it a point not to make my life about that, because I know how little being attractive feels like anything most of the time." Pretty privilege and having work done: "I had a boob job, because after 6 years of different eating disorders, the weight loss/gain cycle had done some not so nice things to my body that I wanted corrected. And I never liked my nose. And yeah, my life is better because of how I look. I wouldn't be married to my husband if this wasn't how I looked. I go backwards and forwards some days on whether I like these facts or not. It's not about having a cross to bear so much as not thinking it's fair to be made to feel like the way I look is an inconvenience to the people around me, which is how I felt through this whole thing. No one has to feel sorry for me for the way I look and as much as I feel bad for Kate that Jamie and his friends did a dick-ish thing, I don't feel sorry for how she looks either. I feel bad that a years long friendship has been ruined over something as petty as looks." Regarding her husband liking her for her looks originally: "And this is coming from someone whose husband did (or says he did anyway haha) see them across the room and have a "I have to meet her" moment. I love that for him, but he's not the only man who's seen me across the room and wanted to talk to me, but I didn't end up with any of them because lasting relationships go so far beyond that. And in the years since, he's seen hotter women, it doesn't tarnish our relationship." People asked why it mattered to her so much that her friend asked, because it doesn't hurt to ask: "Well, I sort of used ask and demand interchangeably there, but fundamentally, asking someone to dress "frumpy" (which would have been inappropriate for the style of the event because it is a formal party) because you don't want people to look at them (again, debatable how much this even would have happened) is pretty crappy, in my opinion. I like to see my friends being their best selves all the time. I've celebrated every achievement and milestone in my friends' lives whether or not that's something I could achieve or would have wanted to in another life. That's just what friendship means to me. And as much as people would like to make out that I don't ever suffer from insecurity or jealousy, of course I do, but I will never make that. friend's problem to solve, and make them feel like something that only has to do with me has to do with them because it doesn't. That's not being a friend, to me. Especially because Kate knows that how I dress is as much a part of who I am as my sense of humour, and I have always done it to alleviate social anxiety, not as some ploy to draw people's attention. If Kate had asked everyone to dress down for whatever reason, that's one thing, but asking only me (and then telling our other friends about it) is making me directly responsible for the feelings she is dealing when I'm not. For me, friendship is enjoying each other as you are, not bartering for "first" position on an imaginary podium. And if you don't enjoy being around that person anymore, just don't be friends with them, don't ask them to pander to you, because what's going to be left of an authentic friendship in the end?" A few people criticize her for not being sadder for Kate: "I already said what Jamie said was shitty, and what his friends said is shitty. I've met them multiple times, they're kind of shitty people in general, I'm just not surprised one of them pulled that kind of crap, frankly. And no, Jamie and I would not have hit it off. I was dating my now-husband at the time, and even if it I wasn't, never in a million years would I have hit it off with Jamie, I don't like him like that, we are very different people, we do not vibe on that level. I am absolutely sad for Kate that this is how things played out, and I'm sad that years of friendship has to go down the drain over Jamie because my God is he not worth it. But, I have realised over the course of this whole incident that Jamie is not the beginning and end of the issues between me and Kate. Her self esteem being partially dependent on "winning" over me in a competition I didn't know we were in isn't the way you think about a friend, and it was never how I thought about her. And for her to try to embarrass me, or pull me up for some imagined slight based on something that never had anything to do with me in the first place isn't being a good friend either. And I would have worked on it, honestly I would have, because I love her, but she doesn't want to, which is fine, but I won't be pretending she was in the right for how she's handled this in regard to me because she isn't." One more surprise: someone asks if Jamie thought of himself as better looking, would he have gone for her? "In an uncomfortable twist, I've worked out it's actually not because of his looks. It's because he's not richer." "This is super weird, because I've literally only been putting the pieces together in the last few hours since this all happened. But yeah, looking back on it, Jamie has always teased me (in group situations, not over text or in any inappropriate way) about dating successful men (this is a running joke amongst my friends hence how he knows about it). He's also said a lot of things in the vein of "if you're a guy it's not about looks, it's about money". OMG. It's all coming back to me now. One time him and Kate were out with me and my husband and Kate and I were in the loo, and my husband and Jamie were talking about cars and he mentioned my new car and (jokingly) how he spoils me and Jamie said something like "well yeah, girls like her, you have to, don't you". And me and my husband laughed about it at the time because we thought it was him making a dig at me but looking back on it, now I'm like... Ugh, this is getting gross." Annnnd some people criticize her for not staying friends with Kate: "I don't plan on being friends with Jamie after this, so I have dropped him. As I said in the update, Kate doesn't feel she wants to be my friend right now. That's totally fine, but I'm also not going to run after Kate and beg her to be my friend because honestly she didn't handle this right. For someone who has been my friend for more than a decade to take her issues with her admittedly crappy boyfriend out on me when I had no part in it, and then attempting to use me to rectify a slight I didn't even know about and certainly didn't commit, that's not her being a good friend either. I was her friend long before Jamie's. Long enough to deserve honesty and better from her." Edit because people are wondering where she works: Someone asks if she is a sugar baby: "Stay at home wife, actually." ​ submitted by /u/LucyAriaRose to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

This happened at my wedding. I am very detail oriented and planned my/our wedding with my husband very meticulously. Everything was color coordinated and everything was aesthetically pleasing. Our colors were pink and black. I wanted parents and grandparents to also wear our wedding colors so the wedding photos would be cohesive. I specifically spoke with each person and told them the color scheme and how I would very much like everyone to color coordinate. Nobody had an issue with this, so I thought. Both sets husbands grandparents went out shopping to find clothes to explicitly match our wedding party. I thought that was so cute and appreciated it immensely. My mom and I went shopping for my grandparents, because they asked us to. So they were also matching. I offered to take my mother in law shopping to pick out something to wear but she declined and said she would go with her friends. I said okay and kind of forgot about it. The night of the rehearsal, my mom asks my MIL what she is wearing and she responds with a long dress in the wedding colors. Next day I am getting ready in the bridal suite And my MIL moseys on up and is wearing a royal purple ball gown. She doesn’t wear makeup that often, and I was shocked to see she was wearing neon blue eyeshadow and bright pink lipstick. Her husband wore a matching tie. I was livid, but ignored it because I didn’t want it to ruin my big day. My FIL asked me how he looked during pictures and I responded “you and MIL stick out like big sore purple thumbs”. He asked what that was supposed to mean, and I told him that they knew the dress code. Now they look out of place. He said he wore was given to him and would relay the message to my MIL. My mother in law approached me later in the night and asked me my issue. I asked her why she lied about her outfit choice. She said she never bought a dress that would go with our wedding colors and planned on wearing the purple dress she found. It was more true to her and that’s what mattered. I said that’s fine, I’ll fix the pictures in post production. She said I would not adjust anything, they paid for the pictures and I would not alter anything. I said, any picture I post with her in it will be altered on my end, so they have no control of what I do. I excused myself and enjoyed the rest of my wedding. My MIL has a habit of trying to make things about her and make little comments like “well I am the mother of the groom, my opinion counts.” Or “I can make decisions too, I’m the mother of the groom and we are helping pay for this wedding”. My parents paid for 70% of the wedding my in laws paid for the photographer and the rehearsal dinner. The photographer was their friend and only charged them $800 for the whole night. The rehearsal dinner cost $300 because they chose the cheapest options for everything possible. *** I only asked my parents, his parents, my grandparents and his grandparents to please wear black and pink. All the men wore black tuxes and pink or black ties. The women minus my mil wore black dresses or pink dresses. NO OTHER GUEST HAD STIPULATIONS TO THEIR ATTIRE EXCEPT “Please wear formal attire”. +++Edit: My FIL knew about the color scheme, and went along with my mother in laws plan because he wanted to prove a point. +++My MIL went out and purchased the purple dress when she had a beautiful black dress in her closet. submitted by /u/meepx3meep to r/AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]

I got married back in June and at my wedding, my now sister-in-law was wearing an outfit with a white top and a black bottom part. I didn't say anything to her at the wedding, but going through my photos with the photographer, I felt like they were a bit silly since the top part of her outfit was literally the same color as my wedding dress, and in certain photos, it really made her pop out. Since they are my wedding photos, I requested the photographer to make my SIL's top to be grayish instead if possible. We only edited the ones where she was standing next/near me btw. When my photographer sent me the finalized version, I distributed them to my family members. My SIL got upset and asked why I edited her white top. I said it was because she stood out too much. SIL requested the original photos with her white top be sent. I contacted my photographer. She said she could send them but at a cost since they were additional photos. I asked if she could just send the raw over, no processing etc. but it was still extra. So I told my SIL if she wanted the original photos, she could give me the extra money and I'll get them for her. This made her upset even more, but I thought she dropped the issue. Fast forward some days and I find out she's talking shit about me behind my back. I went ahead and texted her why the hell she cares about the white top so much and she says she looks really good in white, and bought that outfit specifically since she wanted good photos. I was dumbfounded with that comment so I just didn't reply to her text messages. Then my husband told me the next night that SIL is really upset with me and wants me to respond. She apparently believes I am insecure for editing the photos. AITA here? - Faq: So the outfit she was wearing was a formal jumpsuit. This isn't exact but it looked similar to this photo here. On the day of the wedding, I didn't think her outfit mattered that much but she really did stand out in photos. It's partially due to the backgrounds we used, the lighting and camera work etc. I edited 6 photos in total, with 3 of them being the formal guest photos that everyone takes. I did request editing on other guests but again just to fix any weirdness due to the lighting and background. As far as color goes, no one else wore a lot white. Except some men with button up shirts, however the white was often very overshadowed by the color of their suit jackets. submitted by /u/Low-Abbreviations352 to r/AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]

My wife, “Mina,” enjoys dressing up. Her style is very feminine and she’s always dolled up - even to go shopping. She’s always glowing and is very confident in her appearance. She looks good and she knows it. My sister, “Betty,” believes in traditional ideas of masculinity and femininity. Women are meant to stay home with the children while the men are meant to provide for the household. We talk when we have to, but I try to avoid her. Each time we see Betty, she’ll manage to slip a comment about my wife’s outfit. She’ll either comment on how “ladylike” it is, or how “slutty,” it looks. Mina always rolls her eyes and laughs it off. I don’t think the comments bother her, but I try to tell Betty to mind her own business. Betty invited us for dinner to celebrate her pregnancy. On the invitation, she stated that the dress-code was formal. She didn’t mention a certain colour or style of clothing, only that you had to dress formally. Mina wore this dark green suit that fit her very wel. I’m 100% certain that it fit the dress code. It was formal - nothing revealing or outlandish - and I thought she looked good. When Betty opened the door, I could see the look of disgust on her face when she saw Mina. The first thing she asked was her, (very condescendingly) “Are you really wearing that?” Mina only smiled and replied, “Yes.” Throughout the night, I could tell Betty was talking about Mina to my family. I could see her point and laugh, or whisper something in someone’s ear, or make a face anytime Mina walked by. At one point, Betty “joked” about Mina wearing the “pants” in the marriage, leaving me to wear all the “pink, frilly dresses.” (Mina is too “masculine,” leaving me to be the “wife” in the relationship.) As distasteful as those jokes were, Mina asked me to not make a big deal. After we had all eaten, Betty stood up to make a toast. At first, her speech started off well. It was sweet. However, near the end, Betty decided to throw passive-aggressive comments towards Mina. I’m sure I don’t remember all of it, but she essentially said, “It’s going to be hard raising my daughter in a world where women want to act and dress like men.” (all while making direct eye contact with Mina) “The devil often hides in the people that are closest to us and if you can spot him, don’t let him in your house.” During that entire section of her speech, her eyes never left Mina. Before the end of the speech, Mina stood up from the table and left and I followed her. I got a bunch of texts from my BIL, scolding me for leaving in the middle of my sister’s speech. Betty called me, calling me rude for leaving while she was speaking and not “controlling my hot-headed wife.” When I heard this, I laughed and hung up the phone. That led to more texts. When I told Mina she laughed, but suggested I apologise - but in an effort to make this whole thing blow over. EDIT: Forgot to add, reposted because I went over the word count the first time. submitted by /u/mywifeinasuit to r/AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]

My wife and I have 3 daughters (19, 24, & 28). Our youngest, Jill, just started community college this year while our 2 oldest have moved away to start their careers. Jill still lives with my wife and I as she is attending college locally and this saves her money. This past weekend we were invited to my niece's (and goddaughter) wedding a couple hours away. The dress code was semi-formal so men were expected to wear suits and women in dresses. As we were getting ready to leave, Jill was taking her sweet time getting ready and I was kind of nagging at her to get going. She had been out late the night before with friends and I'm sure she was feeling the effects of that. When she was finally ready to go, she was wearing some kind of black, spaghetti strap halter-top thing with leggings. I told her that was not an appropriate outfit for her cousin's wedding and that she needs to change into something else. She told me she doesn't have anything else to wear and that I don't get to police what she's wearing. I told her that judging by the amount of dirty clothes on her floor and in her closet, she clearly has other options, she just didn't plan ahead enough to figure something out. I told her it was disrespectful to her cousin, the bride, to wear something to revealing and tacky to their wedding. Jill called me a jerk and said no one is going to care what she's wearing and if people focus on her clothes more than the bride, that's their problem, not hers. I told her in that case, how she is getting to the wedding is her problem, not mine. She asked what that meant and I told her that if that's what she wants to wear, she is going to have to find her own way to the wedding because I am not going to arrive with my daughter looking like she is about to hit a club at 2am instead of attend her cousin's wedding. My wife chimed in at this point and told us both to calm down. She told me I was being over-bearing, but also told Jill that she did not agree with her choice of attire either and reminded her this is a semi-formal event. She told Jill she would help her find a different option that would be better suited for this. Jill scoffed at that and went to her room and closed the door. I went and knocked and told her she has 15-minutes to be ready or we are leaving without her. She yelled at me that I was being an asshole so I went outside to wait and after 20 minutes I went inside and Jill was still in her room. I told my wife that I am leaving and she can either come with me now, or her and Jill can figure out their own plans. My wife asked what Jill is supposed to do and I said she can take an Uber for all I care at this point. My wife reluctantly left with me and I could tell she felt guilty about the whole thing. Jill ended up not coming to the wedding and both her and my wife blame me for it. I don't think I was the asshole here though. submitted by /u/papabearaita to r/AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]

Hi all. My family is Indian-American, but I like to think I am pretty progressive. I (40F) have a son (16M) and a daughter (15F). My daughter has started to become a tomboy over the last 2 years, despises feminine clothing and style. While it has definitely been an adjustment in my perception, I have always tried to be as supportive as possible, and have let her pick her own clothings, only eliminating anything that was graphic or inappropriate. However, my niece was getting married in a traditional, big Indian wedding. While generally all the girls would be wearing formal lehangas (Indian traditional dresses), I dropped it after asking my daughter if she wanted to wear that and she said no (only mentioned it once because she really looks up to my niece and I did not want her to feel left out). When I asked her what she wanted to wear, she said that should wear a t-shirt and slacks. But, I insisted that she wear a formal clothing of her choice, whether it was a suit, a dress or traditional indian clothing. This was black tie event. I was making my son wear a formal suit. Everyone was going to be dressed to the nines. I was going to get my son a new suit tailored for the event, and I insisted that she come with and pick a fabric and suit style as well. It could be to her desire (as long as it was appropriate); like a very typical men's suit or feminine twist like what Zendaya wears. She got angry and said I was constricting her expression. I think she will have to wear formal clothing in other points in her life, whether for work or other formal events. She can express herself however she wants but dressing appropriately for the occasion is a necessary skill. The wedding has been postponed for now, but I still want her to wear a formal outfit and she is still mad at me about this. AITA? EDIT: Wow, I did not expect this to blow up like this haha! Thank you for the comments and messages! While some of you have labeled me as the asshole, I think a lot of you are saying that I am not which is good to hear. But, I want to stress that I don't think my daughter is really the asshole (a little right now) but she is the sweetest little girl in the world (I might be biased haha). She is usually very respectful, gets excellent grades and works really hard. I am very proud of her. Some of you have mentioned there is an underlying problem that I am not seeing. I do not think my daughter is trans, but I think I have made it clear that its okay if she or anyone else is. She also generally seems pretty happy with her body; she is actually really fashionable and doesn't really wear baggy clothing or anything, but is more into "streetwear." She is the one who showed me who Zendaya is! Are there additional signs I should be looking for or things I should be doing? I think she is at the stage in life where she knows everything, and I, her mom, knows nothing. She wants to rebel for something, but isn't really the type to rebel with something really bad (thank god), so she decided this is a justified area to rebel. She is also at home, and I haven't really allowed her to go out because of the current circumstances; so think she feels cooped up and now everything about me is annoying her. That being said, a lot of you said to tell her she can't go to the wedding if she doesn't wear formal clothing, and I may be the asshole here, but SHE IS GOING. That is a thing I have decided to take a hard stance on. (1) because my daughter really, really wants to go! She loves her cousin and my family, and she is a really social person who would love weddings. Telling her not to go would hurt her I think and would be counterproductive in the longterm. (2) This is the first wedding in our family and the first time my kids will see a traditional Indian wedding. They have never seen one before, so I think its important that they learn and feel connected to our culture. (3) If she decides not to go as an act of rebellion, I know my daughter, and I know she will feel really, really sad afterwards. Parenting is hard, and I was always a girly-girl and so were all the people around me, so this uncharted territory for me. Thank you to all of you for your kind words and encouragement. submitted by /u/amiwrong6321 to r/AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]