Sofa Cover

Ok this time my picture loaded. These are the cushions I have been working on. The sofa is L shaped.  Still have the cover for the dog bed to do.   prayers for those that need them and a celebratory shoutout to those cruising or celebrating a special event!

... and have been dealing with sofa batons shitty software, hardware and... something different if it can cover my full media center setup...

... and have been dealing with sofa batons shitty software, hardware and... something different if it can cover my full media center setup...

Phew, what a scorcher! After a very mild sundowning, we're sat in the garden. Even in the shade it's very warm, but pleasant. Washed the cover of the sofa we sit on, this morning. I was originally going to give it a cotton wash (90°) - that would have taken over 3 hours. In the end I opted for the 'rapid wash' but set at 60° (over an hour).

... evening was spent on the sofa watching “Project Hail Mary” and “.... We have enough people to cover the day, but our Fearless ...

... 2 Get 1 Free] Verona Sofa Cover in Premium Microfiber (Modern Style... GIFTS: 2 Cushions 1 Sofa Cover: Green / 2 Sofa Covers: Black / Size: 3...

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/CuriousButNotJewish Originally posted to r/relationship_advice How do I [F28], a widow, tell my in-laws[M58][F59] about my new partner? I am very, VERY close to them (for all intents and purposes they treat me as their daughter, events, sleepovers, trips etc.) and I am afraid that this will destroy everything Thanks to u/withlovetara & u/soayherder for suggesting this BoRU Trigger Warnings: death of a spouse, mentions trauma Original Post: May 3, 2026 I married my soulmate, the love of my life and the light of my eyes 3.5 years ago. Unfortunately, he died shortly after our wedding due to an illness, in my arms and while holding his parents' hands. Suffice to say this was traumatic for everyone involved, everyone in his family tattooed his name on their wrist (I have a marriage tattoo, so not a name but a date tied to him, which is why I didn't do it), and the whole after-death, mourning, etc. period we bonded very deeply over his memory. For context (this is relevant), I am from country A. My late husband was from country B. I lived with him in country C, and since then I've moved and now live in country D. As my husband was dying, we both moved from C to B, so that burial and everything else would be easier. I then stayed with my in-laws for a while, moved back to C, sold the apartment I owned there shortly after and moved to D. I am thus now stranded, in a way, between my family (all in A) and my in laws family (all in B). I travel ~2 times a year to spend time with in-laws in B, maybe once a year to spend time with my own fam in A, and maybe once a year my entire blood family comes to D to spend time with me. It's an expensive and exhausting arrangement but it works in maintaining both bonds. It also means that when I am in B, I am now for all intents and purposes treated by in-laws, and the entire rest of my late husband's family, like I am their child: I live with them, travel with them around the country, eat with them, play video games together with my "siblings" in law, I am on the walls of their house in holiday photos and spend time with my late husband's cousins and now, these are basically my family too, my mom dad grandparents cousins etc. They're just as mom and dad as my own mom and dad are. And here comes the hard question: I'm in my late 20s. After my hubby died, I did date now and then, with eventually hoping for marriage and kids, but nothing seemed to work, fellow widows know what that's like. And then... I met this guy. And he has been, well, not like my late husband, but you know how sometimes you meet someone and they are YOUR person? And you just know? In a different way, this man is as much a soulmate now as my husband was. And he is very chill with me going to in-laws, mentioning a memory of something I did with my late husband on occasion, having a picture of him in my bedroom, etc. He is caring, loving, understanding and patient, everything a young widow could ask for... and things are moving fast. Which is the problem. Thus far, I never mentioned any relationships to my in-laws. They are aware, I am certain, that I do date, have sex, etc. but they don't ask, and I don't talk, about anything or anyone other than my late husband while in country B. I don't feel like that's respectful to change that, buuuuuut - well, I want to move in with this guy. And I want to stop saying I'm going on 'solo trips' when I'm actually going on trips with this guy. And I love him, a lot, and we are already talking marriage, and children. And I have to tell them that this man now exists in my life, and here I am, in my in-laws' toilet, writing this out at 2am to ask Reddit for advice. With 2 days left before I go back to country D and don't come back here to B until... God knows. Maybe Christmas? I have to tell them, and I want to do it in person while I am here, but I don't know how. I don't want it to seem ostentatious - there is pictures of me and late husband, together, hugging, on holidays, EVERYWHERE in the house, and announcing a new man in my life out of the blue might seem like I'm bragging or something. I'm not. I also don't want it to seem like I'm leaving them aside - I'm not. They are MY mom and dad in law, my gran gran and gram gram in law, my little brother and sister in law, and this will change nothing. Even after I get married. Even if I have children. They remain family to me and kin. But how do I even start this conversation? Because they won't ask. And I don't know how to mention it, in a way that we never speak about it again, in a way that respects and shows that my late husband is STILL my soulmate, still the light of my eyes - he's just not the only one, anymore. I'm scared out of my mind that this will make me lose them. Relevant Comments OOP responds to a comment about overthinking everything and how her late husband’s family might react to the new relationship OOP: Oh I know it's not betrayal. I am fully ok with this, I'm not feeling guilty over it or anything. Part of what made my soulmate well, my soulmate, is his emotional intelligence, his wisdom way beyond his years, his foresight and his empathy. He was dying and yet he took a few hours, sat me down, and made sure he understood and I understood what will happen once he dies. He told me in no uncertain terms that he wants me to date again. Like a petulant child, I told him I'll kill myself instead to not have to suffer a life without him - and I almost did. The lucidity that came after the suicide attempt made me realise he was right, and I don't carry any guilt in my heart, because in my head, it's a bit like polygamy if that makes sense? I still love my husband, deeply, profoundly and every second, but also, he is ok with this. He wanted me to find another good man (or woman). He wanted me to have children, if I wanted them. What do I have to be guilty for? He ain't mad at this, he's cheering me onwards and is probably proud of me for finding such a good catch. His parents are not as open minded. That's what I'm afraid of - their reaction, and the family's reaction as a whole. He comes from a very tightly knit family, and I really enjoy this, how close and personal everyone is with everyone. But they also might find it painful to picture me as OP, Woman Married to Unknown Man, as opposed to OP, Widow of our Dear Departed And Beloved Relative. The thing is, I am both. I will ALWAYS be both. I am wearing my wedding band proudly, continuously, and likely will keep it on a chain after I marry my current partner (and start wearing our wedding bands instead). Even now I have a promise ring of sorts on my middle finger, right next to my wedding band. For me these things are not a contradiction. I contain multitudes. I just don't know how to help my family of kinship also see this and not reject me. OOP on the reasons for wanting children with a partner OOP: Unfortunately, the line is tick tocking on my biological clock. I have a health condition that is degenerative - it might cause me to become infertile later in life. As you can imagine, in our day and age, this put off many men, who don't see why we shouldn't just wait till I'm 35+, but my late husband and I shared what we knew we always wanted out of life: at least two children (amongst other things). I'm only rushing because I'm afraid that if I don't have all the kids I want by 32-33, I may never have them :(. I wish women didn't have a biological clock, so I didn't have to do that. But life forces cruel choices on us. Had my late husband not died, we were considering starting children at 26 or so, so in a way (and I know this may sound silly) I feel a bit like I'm already "behind" on my planned timeline. House ownership? Check. Good job and being the breadwinner? Check. Finding a good partner to settle down and have kids with? Well, it was a check, and then life told me not only do I not get to have that check anymore, I have to keep staying alive and suffer through what's left. And I'm doing just that, I went to grief counselling, I made my peace with it, life sucks, so I'm just trying to make the best of a bad situation... but I know it's perhaps harder to understand for someone without a degenerative disease. Trust me, I wouldn't rush, if only I felt like I could afford to. (And before anyone asks, no, it's not inheritable.) OOP on if she has her relationships with her biological family as she only mentions much more about her in-laws than her own OOP: I don't, I'm much more close to my biological mom and my bio family over in-laws, but my father is an alcoholic and a bit of a gambling addict and growing up I have fought with him, shouted at him, and even physically assaulted him twice out of sheer anger (I definitely had anger issues as a teenager, and broke my dear mother's heart countless times over my inability to contain them). Now as an adult I have learned to love and appreciate him from a distance. I also love and have always loved children, and my parents are single children, so I have no cousins, and two of my four grandparents were dead by the time I married, so my grandparent exposure has been fantastic, but sadly limited. Comparatively, my late husband has 4 living grandparents (who are now great grandparents), 12 uncles and aunts, and... 18 cousins? I am close with around 9 of them. Of which some are children. And I love being here, playing with them, playing in general. It feels like family. It feels like what I want MY family to be when I have children. When I grew up we didn't really celebrate Christmas, we were too poor. When I grew up I had a chronic illness so everyone was constantly worried that the only child in the entire family will die if they don't take care of me, so we didn't travel much. When I grew up... people loved me, I was a very loved and wanted child, but I was also a difficult, angry, depressed child who felt the weight of the world on her shoulders and I know I didn't make my family's lives easy, the opposite. Which is why I moved to C by myself, took student loans, did a very good university on scholarships and debt, and am now making enough money to give my parents the life they never had growing up themselves (I send them money every month so they can do whatever they want and be happy with them). I feel like I'm allowed this small, vicarious, selfish luxury, to be in this family that's not my blood and pretend I belong. Play with the Legos I never had as a baby. Coo at all the toddlers I never played with, play football with the aunts and uncles I never had. It's not mom and dad's fault that they are who they are. They sacrificed everything to raise me. Sometimes they starved so that I never lacked anything. But at the same time, what do I have back in the home country to visit? Dying grandparents? Sad memories? I love my country, but I don't want to go back. I want mom and dad and my grandparents, as much as they can, to keep coming to country C to spend time with me. I want to make so much money that I can bring my mom and dad here to live with me permanently, even, once they retire and my grandparents die. I just don't see the point in visiting my country of origin, not because it's a bad country (I won't say what it is, but it is objectively an amazing country y'all have heard of), but because I have such a small family that I can just bring them all to me instead. We can go to cute cafes and buy stupid adult Legos and visit overpriced zoos and do all the silly stuff we haven't done before now. I'm killing myself working overtime with a chronic illness to make it happen. I don't think it means I'm more distant from my parents and grandparents of blood. It's just different. Commenter 2: Out of curiosity what are the timelines here? How long were you with your late husband and how long have you been with your current partner? What cultures and continents are we dealing with? My white Western anglophone POV might be out of line, you know? OOP: We're all Europeans, countries A B C D are a mix of Eastern, Southern and Western Europe. I was with my husband 4 years in total, this new guy I've dated for... we're coming up on 8 months? We're not getting married soon or anything, just talking about moving in together. OOP on the timeline of her dating, marriage, and her husband's passing OOP: I first came to country B to visit maybe 1.5 years before he died? We started to bond and do things together all of us already, for sure, but it definitely kicked up a notch after he died. I had a lot of cousins and aunts and uncles at my wedding I barely even knew the names of, but now I would trust them all with my life as if they were blood relatives. They also started visiting me in D after I bought my house there, so by definition after he died. He's been gone 3.5 years, we were married half a year, and we were both 24 at the time. New guy is 29. In-laws are from a very Catholic culture, I don't want to say the country specifically, but nobody in the family is religious. Does this help?   Editor's note: OOP updated into the original post Update: May 4, 2026 (same post, next day) EDIT: I DID IT I talked only to my mother in law, because I was a bit afraid to talk to them both, and I kept putting it off until literally the last second before we went to bed but, I did it. I told her that this guy is the first serious relationship I've had since hubby passed away, that it's quite a new thing (I was afraid to tell her it's been a long time - I can come clean about this small lie later on, if he becomes more than boyfriend) but that I've known him for a longer while because we're in the same friend group, and to my surprise, she asked me to tell her more about him! She cut me off at some point then and told me she is very happy for me, but she only wants one thing from me: to stay in touch with them, and to not push them aside, and to that I told her I had been freaking out the whole time while in country B about how to tell her, and she said it’s silly, even seemed to get a bit cross at me that I could ever be afraid to tell her because we are family, and I told her to me she is mom as much as my own mom is mom, so I was afraid to lose her and lose that, and anyway we hugged and she is very happy for me and we bonded over how we were both afraid that this moment would distance me from them, but I reassured her that literally nothing will change between us, and I am as much her daughter now as I will always be. So yeah: turns out, y'all were right, I freaked out over nothing much, and while I am uncertain as to when, or if, rest of family will find out, since she is the one I am closest with and she also knows her children and husband best, I trust that she'll mention it to them when she thinks that the time is right. At the same time I told my boyfriend, and he is very happy that it all went well, and congratulated me for it : D I did chicken out on telling her the full truth, how long we've been together, and stuff like that, as well as to have a full "we need to sit down" talk with father in law, but all in all, I think this is as ok as it will get, and I am reassured that even if he doesn't take it as well, mom (in law?) is in my corner and she is happy for me. Extra detail that entirely blew me away: the guys who said to mention to her that husband did tell me to remarry were more spot on the money than they thought. Turns out, not only did he have this conversation with me, he ALSO had this conversation with them, so she said she is ok with it especially because late hubby told her that this is what he wants. I do feel a bit uneasy at the thought of how this might have went had he not, but once again from beyond the grave and 3 years ago he protected his wife and made sure I am safe and accepted by his family, which. Guys. At 24, while dying. I cannot put into words how much I love this man. I would die for him to get even another hour of life. Until his last day he thought of me and loved me. How blessed are we that we get to have experienced a man such as him into our lives. I dunno how all of the guys who wanted an update will get it but uh... here you go? lol   Editor's note: below are two posts that are tangentially to the original and update posts WIBTAH to go ahead with buying a bunk bed despite my partner's hesitation?: May 17, 2026 (nearly two weeks later) Long story short, both my partner (30M) and I (28F) currently live in apartments with roommates. I have finally managed to save enough money and buy an apartment that I absolutely love, and since I wanted to move in with my partner eventually, this turned out to be a great moment for us to do so. We talked about it and, the conclusion we reached is that as I bought the apartment by myself, he will pay me half of the mortgage as rent after he moves in until (if) we get married. Anyway, one of the biggest reasons why I wanted to buy instead of continuing to rent is that I ADORE loft beds. They are my favourite beds in the world, I love the "living upstairs, couch beanbag with PS5 and projector and RGB lighting downstairs behind princess curtains" aesthetic, it's literally my dream. This is something I told my partner for a long time even before buying this apartment, that this is my dream bed, I want to buy one day, and it was a big motivator to buying (in our country almost all apartments for rent are furnished already so low chances to have a loft bed unless I buy the place instead of renting). Never has anything been said by him against this. I even showed him my Pinterest board with how I want it to look, 0 complaints. Now that the place is ready and I am starting to prepare for ordering furniture, ending my rent contract, and moving in, I am showing him again all of the inspo pics and he seems... less than thrilled? He asked a few times if I am sure this is the best choice for a bed, what if him or I fall off of the ladder at night, etc. I told him that the living room will also have a very comfortable guest bed AND a sofa with an extendable bed, so we don't have to sleep together if he doesn't like the bed, but he's all "hmm" and "maybe" and non-committal noises and it's a bit stressful tbh. Feels like he's raining on my parade. I even told him that there's no pressure with the move, I am fortunate enough to be able to pay the mortgage by myself if he isn't certain about moving together anymore, and he got a bit upset at me for implying we'd be giving up our shared dream of living together and sleeping together in the same bed just because he isn't sure about the loft bed idea. I don't know how to tell him this gently, but the loft bed isn't negotiable. It's absolutely happening. He knew about it for such a long time. At the same time, I asked my best friend (who is a man) what he thinks I should do and he said that I should be more open to compromise with this because compromise is the heart of a good relationship. But I don't want to compromise. I want my loft bed. WIBTAH to go ahead with buying it even though my partner isn't super thrilled with the idea? Sorry if my English is bad or the text sounds badly worded, English isn't my native language. Edit: I see some people are confused and think I am talking about those loft beds children have, I am talking about the double-bed sized loft beds that IKEA has for adults, specifically this one: https://www.ikea.com/us/en/p/stora-loft-bed-frame-black-80160867/ Edit 2: fair enough, I take people's points about the weight limit, I'll inquire with a carpenter to have a custom bed built in the same style, but with a sturdier frame. I hear your safety concerns. Edit 3: a kind redditor suggested a bed and the company just happens to deliver to where I live, so it looks like I'll be buying this beauty, with a very much 2-adults'-weight maximum weight to it: https://abc-meubles.com/fr/lit-mezzanine-bois/1452-1270341-lit-mezzanine-sylvia-escalier-cube.html#/67-couleur-brut_sans_vernis Cheers to all the other suspended (apparently bunk is not the word, loft bed is correct) bed owners out there pouring in their stories and helpful advice Tonight I have a date and guess what topic we'll discuss over some nice dinner - will update later! Edit 4: This sub won't let me post comments anymore cause y'all have downvoted my comments answering your questions so much that it fell under some threshold. So no updates or INFO answers anymore. Too bad. Also please stop mentioning "guest rooms". This is not the US. It is a 1 bedroom apartment in a European capital city where the average 2 bedroom apartment is at least 1 million EUR. It doesn't have the immense amount of space that American houses have. We all wish we had those houses. Those houses here, in bumfuck nowhere in the countryside, would be between 1 and 2 million EUR. Edit 5: we didn't break up. We talked about it, and I posted an update on it: https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/comments/1tg76o0/update_wibtah_to_go_ahead_with_buying_a_bunk_bed/ To everyone cursing me out and wishing for the death of my relationship, sorry babes, it ain't happening. AITAH has no consensus bot, OOP received mixed reactions, splitting between NTAs and YTAs Editor's note: OOP made numerous responses in this post, the majority of her responses have been downvoted. I am listing significant details not covered Relevant Comments Commenter 1: .... all loft beds are literally under "kids' loft beds & bunk beds" category in Ikea. It's definitely 100% NOT for adults. There's only 1 double mattress loft bed in the states and They even say: "Please note that our loft bed frames are designed for one person at a time even if 2 or more persons total weight is less than 220lb per bed limit." You're mistaken OOP: We don't live in the states. In my country's IKEA website, bunk beds are not aged like they seem to be in the US. Commenter 2: What are your ceiling heights though? Are you going to be bumping your head all the time? OOP: If I remember correctly, they're a bit under 4 meters (editor's note: a bit over 13 feet). It's an old apartment and has blessedly freakishly tall ceilings. OOP on the cost of a place in her country OOP: In my country an apartment with more than 2 rooms is a million EUR (editor's note: $1,160,400.00 USD). I'm being realistic here. Already being able to own my place before I'm 30 is massively ahead of my generation. + Rent is generally higher than mortgage, because housing market sucks ass. 2. a 2 bedroom apartment is around a million EUR, because housing market sucks ass. 3. Being able to afford any real estate in this nightmare of a country is already huge, the average first time house buyer is over 40 years old. Buying my own place before 30 is immense in itself. Commenter 3: it’s your house, not his. if he wants an option on furnishing, he should be paying half the mortgage and half the price of the furnishings. OOP: Technically he's prying half of the mortgage amount per month, but I put my foot down and this will be in the form of a rent contract. It is my property and it will remain my property. OOP on who is paying for the bed OOP: And I'm paying for the bed lol. Like he ain't paying 50%, another commenter made me realise how stupid I am to consider someone else's vision for a bed when I'm buying the furniture, for an apartment I bought... OOP on the weight limit of the loft bed that might not hold her and her partner OOP: We both weigh, together, 130kg. If the bed breaks under us I'll file a customer complaint because wtf lol. Commenter 4: INFO: Do you like having sex with your partner? Do they make loft beds big enough for 2 people? Would you consider a loft that's more of a couch on top? I'm not gonna shit on you for your dream even if I don't get it but I'm just gonna tell you right now you are describing a single person's lifestyle not something that is practical for a couple. So decide which one you want more. OOP: The loft bed frame is 200x200, I've already had a ton of sex in this exact type of loft bed when I had a very short FWB stint in college with another girl who had this bed, trust me, it's 100% sturdy enough lol. Like you can do all kinds of bondage in it even because of how big the frame is and how many board nooks it has available - it makes for some INSANE shibari if your partner knows how to make it! The loft bed love I have is unrelated to this lol, I loved loft beds even before discovering their BDSM potential, but the adult, queen sized loft beds are definitely made with sex in mind, take my word on this ;) OOP on considering hers and her partner's heights OOP: We're both short people and the place has high ceilings, so we shouldn't have problems hitting our heads. Our sex life is, let's say, potentially adventurous: given that we both have housemates, we haven't had the chance to try lots of crazy stuff, but this apartment will be a bit of a chance to explore some kinks and fetishes we both have in common. The bunk bed will help with that also, since there are lots of posts and polls to wrap rope around on it ;) + We're both about the same height, 168-170cm, idk what that is in American units. (editor's note: approximately 5'5") Commenter 5: I mean if the bed is more important to you than the partner is, which it sounds like is the case, then I think that says a lot about your relationship. OOP: It's not about the bed itself, same as it wasn't about the Iranian yoghurt. This is something I communicated as a non-negotiable to him forever ago, it is a dream I actively sank tens of thousands of euros to achieve. The fact that he's only now, when we're 95% there, saying he doesn't like it or is a dealbreaker, feels to me like if I was dating some guy for 10 years with the clear understanding that we both want children, only for him to change his mind up and say he needs to think last moment. You know what I mean? This is a dream of mine he was aware of for pretty much years and only now when it's about to happen he reveals he doesn't like it. If he hated the concept why not tell me sooner? Like when I showed him my inspo Pinterest boards? OOP on the deed of the apartment OOP: I'm sorry, is his name on the deed to this house? Is he buying the furniture? Are we going 50/50 on it? No? Ah, well. Equals isn't just a vibe, equals is a thing counted in cold hard cash. + I have only my name on the deed, he will have a rental contract with no equity claim to my property if he does move in with me. Commenter 6: YTA. You want him to move in, but he doesn’t even get a say in any furniture and he's paying half of the bills. Then you told him the bed is non-negotiable and he can sleep elsewhere or LIVE elsewhere. If this is your dying hill and something to strain your relationship over you have growing to do. OOP: He's paying rent. I paid the down deposit, I pay and am responsible for this house. As far as I am concerned he can have the certainty and joy of us living together, but unless he coughs up some down deposit and we buy a property together, the same way my landlords certainly don't ask me how I want my rental apartment furnished, he also doesn't get a say. We are both adults and I won't be a doormat and let him act as if he bought this house. OOP on whose idea was to move in together OOP:He's the one who keeps pushing for us to move in together as a great opportunity. I won't lie, having to not pay half of the mortgage would be easier on my wallet, and he only works part time, so he could do household chores (he already said he'd want to cook for us and clean the place so that I don't have to hire cleaning help)... I'm ok with him moving in but if he doesn't I won't die.   [Update] WIBTAH to go ahead with buying a bunk bed despite my partner's hesitation?: May 17, 2026 (same day, hours later) Short update to all the lovers of loft beds (I have now learned it's called loft and not bunk) and all of those fervently calling me a thousand names and acting like I'm torturing my gem and babe of a partner by having him move in with me. We just had a date night. It was lovely, if a bit cold (why is it so cold so close to summer, anyway?), and with my mind heavy from all the commenters absolutely losing their shit at the concept of shorter-than-average adults sleeping in anything other than the most insanely massive beds known to man, I gently prodded the topic of the loft bed back into conversation. I put all my cards on table and was fully honest, told him that I am hurt that he seems to not have taken me seriously before, that I want to find a compromise that makes him happy as well, but at the same time, that this bed is very important to me and I am not sure where to go from here, but I want to discuss it seriously, because his dismissive attitude made me unsure about the future. To my surprise, he was himself surprised that I took his grumpiness about the bed so seriously. He said he's still not thrilled at the idea, that he was hoping I had reconsidered a bit in light of the negatives he raised, but that if that's what I really want, he'll be there for me for it. And then we got to planning. I won't bore the good folks with too many details; I showed him the French bed someone suggested from the last post (I linked it in the previous post), he liked that the stairs look way less slippery than the IKEA ladder, suggested we put some anti-slip surface carpets on them for extra safety and also that we bolt the contraption to the walls to reduce shaking during, ahem, adult activities, and then he asked me if I think we could fit a bed underneath that bed, and if I'd be ok with that. I said probably yes, but that it wouldn't be a massive bed. He said that's fine. So that's what's happening. The gaming console and beanbag combo will have to relocate somewhere else (the office, most likely - its existence seems to have confused a lot of people, just to help clarify, it's a 1 bedroom apartment with a small office room which is too small to be a bedroom by itself), the downstairs curtains don't really fit into the picture anymore, but we'll put a bed underneath the loft bed, so he can choose whether he wants to sleep in his bachelor-style pad under the stairs (Harry Potter jokes were had) or climb up with me in the upper area. He also said that he hopes I'll grow tired of the "heights" sooner rather than later, to which I jokingly said he'll have to ground me down a lot for that to happen (does this joke make sense in English? it's like when you direct electricity into the ground by reaching up to the sky with a metal antenna), and in response he gave me a tight hug and kiss. The world didn't explode. We didn't break up. We'll just have an even funkier bed situation than before: a double bed underneath the loft bed. It will probably look something like this (replace the table and single bed with a full bed underneath the loft bed): https://pin.it/4SG9BidJt But it's not that bad. We might even put the curtains on the upper side of the bed (the ceiling? a rail? not sure yet) to keep the whimsy aspect and then it might look like something like this: https://pin.it/16BNKDu2e We also, to the annoyance of that person complaining about who makes Pinterest boards anymore, agreed to make a shared pins board to be more in touch with this project and how we see it. Uh... the end? I know some people wanted an update once the bed came home, but realistically, that will be one month from now or so, I thought I'd give this small update until then. The drama my little princess whimsy bed truly was crazy so hopefully this calms some folks down. Editor's note: again, OOP made numerous responses in this post, the majority of her responses have been downvoted Some Comments Has OOP slept in a loft bed before? OOP: I did have it in one of the previous rentals I had, and an ex-girlfriend of mine also had it. It's very much a love it or hate it thing I'm starting to learn - some people absolutely despise them and some really like them, one thing is for certain though, they're not for houses with low ceilings. Saw someone say they had less than 1m between the bed and ceiling in their one as a child, which sounds like a casket with extra steps. Commenter 1: You should show him your other post and comments so he can see exactly how uncaring and dismissively you spoke about him. He has a right to know how you actually view him. It would probably be an eye opener for him. OOP: I think he's happier enough not seeing my angrier side. Some of the stuff people said there... phew. I have a temper, it's in my people's blood, we can light up from nothing, fiery blood. I did say some bullshit I didn't actually mean, when redditors call me entitled retarded a child a bitch a psychopath and every other name under the sun, of course it gets under my skin and makes me aggressive. But with him I'm feeling the kind of calm I've never felt before. As long as we find compromise and respect each other, there is no reason to become upset. He hasn't harmed before, ever, has never raised his voice or called me names. I have no reason for anger with my love. If anything, he seemed more happy that we'll get a cat than anything. And now we have to figure out how to make a cat staircase that's safe for it to climb up in bed and back... I still don't see the joy in it, but that's his lifelong dream, so everyone is moving forward with their plans it seems 😉 Commenter 2: He said he didn’t want the bed, but you are going to it anyhow. You aren’t a great partner. You are prioritizing a “fun idea” over his comfort. OOP: We made a compromise, that's how compromises work. I am happy, he is happy. A compromise did not mean tossing the bed out or breaking up with him or whatever people kept saying I should do.   THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7 submitted by /u/Choice_Evidence1983 to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/sparkle_fairy458 Originally posted to r/AITAH WIBTAH if I refused to run errands for my parents anymore? Editor’s note: changed letters to names for ease of readability Thanks to u/NotayourDadBR for suggesting this BoRU Trigger Warnings: manipulation, entitlement, possible financial infidelity Original Post: April 27, 2026 THROWAWAY ACCOUNT! Hey guys! I {28f} have absolutely had it with being used by my parents. So a bit of context: I live very close to my parents. I have two children under the age of 6 and a husband. My husband works abroad, so most of the time it's just me and my littles. I work from home and I work 8 hours a day for four days a week. We do well for ourselves. A few months ago, my car decided it was going to have engine problems and just shit out on me. So while I was shopping around for a replacement, my father decided to help me out with a used car that him and my mother owned. It's an SUV very spacious. And honestly they weren't going to be using it anymore considering my father takes the company car home from his job. Not only that but they were finally gonna fix their Nissan for my dad. Now I do need to include the amount of vehicles they have. 2 Chevys, 1 Nissan, and the SUV they gave me. Now because my father taught me responsibility I absolutely didn't want to take it for free, so I bargained with my dad to help him out. They had paid $3300 for the SUV when they got it. But it needed several repairs. (2 Window regulators, side mirror, ac, etc.) A few minor things. So my dad and I agreed that I would pay $1500 for it and just promise to take care of it. Which of course I do and have. So he signed it over to me and I got it in my name immediately, insurance, tag etc. Now because I had to get the repairs done (just one regulator was almost $600 for the part and the labor cost) my dad agreed to let me do $100 a month or more depending on what I want to do that month. I agreed and handed him $500 right there as the first payment. (It's been about 4 months now and I have paid him a total of $950 out of the $1500 for the SUV.) Last month my youngest brother {15m} was at school (his school is 6 minutes from my parents’ house), and he got caught vaping on a THC pen with his buddy from school. So he got "sentenced" to alternative school which is an hour drive from my parents’ house. And the little friend of his that got it with him is their neighbor and his mother doesn't have a working vehicle either, so the boys just go together with my mom normally. They have to be at the alternative school at 7:45 am every morning and picked up at 12:30 pm every afternoon. (This is relevant I promise) Now in the last four months I've had this SUV, my mother has used me as a personal assistant. Why you might ask? I DONT KNOW. But at first it wasn't a lot. Just little hey are you out? Can you stop by the store and grab this and bring it to me? Etc. just small stuff. And recently my grandmother had a surgery hours away, so my mom needed me to pick up my brother and his friend and bring them to the alternative school for 3 days. No biggie. Of course mom I've got you. But I did ask them for gas money. Since I was taking my brother and his friend in my car with my gas and I had just filled it up. My dad gave me 50 one time. (The SUV takes 65 to fill up and the drive to the school being an hour there and an hour back takes about a quarter and a half of my tank each trip) Still I didn't make a big deal of it since it was only 3 days. Now here's where I might be an AH. After those three days my parents have asked me to take my brother and his friend to this alternative school EVERY DAY coming up with excuses and while my dad works my mom is at home laying on the couch. Now I'm sure she gets up during the day, but when I leave she's in the same spot as she is when I come back. No they have not given me anymore gas money. And on top of all of that I've had to still work, take my kids to their appointments, take them to school, etc. Gas is extremely expensive right now and we aren’t broke but I just don't have the extra funds to constantly be filling up my tank and not getting any help but one time. I'm so fed up and I feel like I'm being used. So WIBTAH if I just refused to run errands for my parents? AITAH has no consensus bot, OOP was unanimously NTA Relevant Comments Commenter 1: You should have buy a car from a dealer without strings. OOP: Yeah I sometimes wish I did. Commenter 2: If you're doing so well financially, why can't you afford to pay $1500 cash for an old junker from your parents? Also I don't understand how a school in your district would be an hour each direction plus only a half day. Doesn't make any sense that you're driving four hours per day on high school transportation. The kid needs to get a hardship license OOP: We are doing well enough to make it. But these trips and constantly having to drive while gas is as expensive as it is tearing down our money fast. And I was going to buy it outright for the $1500 but when my dad offered the payment plan my husband and I had agreed that it would help us get the repairs done and not completely clear out our bank account while doing so. Commenter 3: Daughter: Ask the question; what’s wrong with mom? Why isn’t she motivated to get off the sofa? Talk with your brother, find out what’s going on in the house? Are your parents actively caring for him, prep meals, clean house, wash clothes???? Before you cut off your services at least try to find out if your family really needs help. OOP: My little brother is very much a trouble maker. He has been in trouble countless times for several things because he wants to "fit in" but he's choosing the wrong the crowd to hang with. And honestly I don't know what's going on with mom. Commenter 4: Is the mother of the other boy giving you gas money? Because she absolutely should be. Also, “no” is a perfectly acceptable response to unreasonable requests regardless of their past helpfulness to you. OOP: I haven't gotten a penny from the boy’s mother. But as much as the boy is a trouble maker he tried to give me his $5 for lunch one day because I bought the boys breakfast on the first day. He's a sweet kid. I didn't take his money of course. Is OOP's mother taking care of her grandma? OOP: No grandma is at home, and my uncle lives with them and has been taking care of her.   Update #1: April 28, 2026 (next day) UPDATE: WIBTAH if I refused to run errands for my parents anymore? Here's an update for you guys. Yesterday I asked you guys if I WBTAH if I stopped running errands for my parents. Here's what happened. So after talking to my husband and taking y'all's advice, we've decided we will be paying off the SUV. It's only $550 left so it won't be a huge financial hit, but it'll definitely put a dent in the bank account. So this morning, my mother had asked me again to take my brother and his friend to school. I of course said sure, but I'll need gas money. Mom said oh okay well in that case I can just take your SUV for the day and fill it up for you. Now I know my mother. She is the type of woman that will run her gas tank all the way empty and waste her money on other things (cigs, clothes, etc.) before putting it in gas. She also has asked to borrow my car (the one that shit out on me) before and it had a full tank. When she took it she was gone all day, I missed a very important ultrasound for my youngest, and when I got it back it was damn near on E. So I wasn't too willing to let her just take my SUV. So I said no mom. I can take them, but I need gas money, otherwise he's going to have to take a bus or Uber. This is how that convo went. Mom: "Honey I don't understand we gave you gas money." Me: "Yes mama, for the three days I had to and it was only 50. You haven't given me any since and I've been taking them every day." Mom: "50 is a lot of money, you should've made it last." Me: "50 IS a lot of money mama, but that's my point. Driving Henry and Grayson to school every day takes at least a quarter and a half of my tank each trip." Mom: "Okay well I'll just take it and fill it up for you then." Me: "Mama, no. I can take them just please give me gas money." Mom: "This is ridiculous." Me: "It's either you give me gas money or Grayson is just gonna have to take the bus or an Uber." Mom: "Excuse me?!" Me: "Mama I know you. You've borrowed my vehicle before multiple times and each time it goes from a full tank to damn near empty, and you have given me zero compensation for those times. I don't mind helping you mama, but there is a line where help becomes too much and is turning into being used. And right now I feel like you are using me. I feel like y'all only let me buy the SUV so I could be your little errand girl. It's not fair to me, my children, nor my husband. I have a job, my babies have school and appointments, and taking Grayson and Henry to school is affecting our lives and my job negatively." Mom: "I'm calling your father." *Hangs up* About three hours later I get a call from my dad. Here's how that convo went: Me: "Hey dad." Dad: "Hey honey what's going on?" Me: *explains the same thing I told mama* Dad: "Well firstly, I gave her gas money to give to you multiple times. I have just had in cash and not on my card lately, so I gave it to your mother to give to you every morning. Secondly, I absolutely did not let you buy the SUV to be our errand runner. And lastly, Henry's mama was supposed to be giving you money as well." Me: "well dad I haven't received any money unfortunately. And it's affecting my job and the kids schedule. I just can't keep driving 4 hours a day." Dad: "Okay honey. Then don't. I'm sorry. I'll get to the bottom of everything and talk to you later. You didn't take your brother today did you?" Me: "No sir." Dad: "Good, ttyl honey." As of right now, as far as I know from gathering info from my brother, Dad said that Grayson would be paying for an Uber by working for my dad for the whole summer. He won't be getting to do anything but work this summer. As for Henry, he will also be working for my dad the whole summer. Honestly I think some good honest work would be good for the both of them. Mom had a meltdown because Dad found out she was pocketing the money and she won't tell him where it's at. As of right now I don't have any extra info on that part. And my dad has decided that instead of paying the last $550 it's considered PAID OFF. Woohoo! So that's all I have for you guys, I appreciate all your help and comments and helping me grow a shiny new backbone 😊. Relevant Comments Commenter 1: I don’t get it, how does she get to your vehicle if they have several at home? I take it the boys aren’t old enough for drivers licenses yet? OOP: Grayson has his permit, but my dad won't let him drive because he will just go joy-riding instead of going to the alternative school. (He did the first week of alternative school) Henry I am not sure if he has one, but they only have one car and it's run down. Commenter 2: Dad found out she was pocketing the money, and she won't tell him where it's at Mom's got a gambling and/or shopping problem. Betting if Dad starts checking the accounts and cards, there'll be a lot of other money missing. OOP: I'm starting to think that too. But idk I'm trying to get more info out of my other brother.   Editor’s note: OOP made the next two updates on to the same post with the first update Update #2: April 28, 2026 (same post, same day, hours later) EDIT TO ADD UPDATE #2: Okay firstly thank you all again for your comments and support! MANY of you wanted the update on where the money went. Well here's the tea: My other brother (18m we will call him Tyler) lives with them so he's my primary source of info on this update. He said that when he got home from work, my parents were at the table. Tyler said that Dad was calm, but Mom was crying. So Tyler went upstairs and set his stuff down and kinda hovered over the balcony to see if he could hear what was going on. According to Tyler this is how their convo went: Dad: "honey where is the money you were supposed to give (OP)?" Mom: "I gave it to her!" Dad: "No you didn't. And honestly dear this isn't the first time money has been missing." Mom: "What are you accusing me of (Dad's real name)?!?" Dad: "I'm not accusing you, I'm asking for your honesty and your reaction is only solidifying my suspicion." Mom: "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?" Dad: "Where did you go the other night?" Mom: "I didn't go anywhere!" Dad: "I woke up at 2 am that night and you were nowhere to be found." Mom: apparently bawling her eyes out and screams something incoherent Dad: "Calm down and breathe. All I want is honesty." Mom: grabs car keys and runs out the door still incoherent That's all I got so far! I'll keep you guys posted! Relevant Comments Commenter 1: What do you think she has done with it? Could it be cheating? Gambling? Addiction to Drugs? Another family? I’m too invested! OOP: Tyler and I are betting she's messing around Commenter 2: What’s the chances she’s paying for either a side piece or drugs? OOP: Drugs I doubt, but the way she's acting both Tyler and I think she's messing around. Dad hasn't said anything to Tyler when Tyler asked if everything was okay. According to Tyler, Dad looked drained and he went to bed.   Final Update: April 29, 2026 (next day) EDIT TO ADD UPDATE #3: Okay this is the final update. I just got off the phone with my dad. Three things happened. 1) Mom came home this morning at 4am and my dad was waiting for her. 2) He served her divorce papers. Apparently it's been a long time coming. (Not sure if he gave her actual divorce papers or if he just told her he's divorcing her and showed his legal paperwork. I am just relaying what I was told.) 3) He told me about her affair. She's been seeing someone for the last 3 years right under his nose and only found out when on her laptop. He said he never suspected anything because the money that went missing was little bits at a time and mom always had an excuse. But when he noticed she wasn't showing up with the things she said she was buying he started a tally of times she took money and how much. This had been going on for at least a year when my dad found out about her hiding money. So his first reaction was much like most of y'all. She's gambling. But when he started tracking her location via her cars GPS she had never gone to the casinos. She went to her friend Karen's house. Dad had confronted Karen about why mom was gone at night and if they were spending money and Karen covered for mom saying she doesn't know anything about the money but that her and mom were just hanging out when Mom got super stressed. Well you'll never guess the next part. The affair she was having was with Karen and Karen's husband. The money was used for sex toys etc. Apparently dad found about this affair 5 months ago and had divorce papers already drawn up. When my mom got home at 4am he gave her the paperwork and copies of all his evidence against her. He just didn't think that she would stoop so low to steal money from me for my gas. That's the final update, they are getting a divorce and obviously I'm shocked and disgusted. And my brothers are just as shocked.   Editor’s note: Marking this concluded as the issue has been resolved and OOP has deleted this account   DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7 THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP submitted by /u/Choice_Evidence1983 to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

Hi, I am living in Vancouver, Canada on a condo at the 21st floor. I bought this sofa. For anyone living in a cold country too, do you always cover your outdoor sofa every single night? It is spring now here but it is still cold at night and there is dew. If not, what about the dust? Do you just shake off the dust before using the sofa? Do you also know where I can buy cheap cover for this type of sofa? Thank you! https://imgur.com/a/Pa4zAZD submitted by /u/Ushuaia-15 to r/HomeImprovement [link] [comments]

I need some honest opinions because I am officially tired of fighting my couch. Between my dog, my niece visiting every other weekend, and my own questionable habit of eating snacks on the sofa like it's a dining table, the fabric is starting to look… experienced. I’ve scrubbed, spot-cleaned, sprayed, blotted even tried one of those enzyme cleaners TikTok swears by. It still looks dull and constantly collects mystery stains that I swear weren’t there yesterday. So now I’m considering getting a sofa cover, but I genuinely don’t know if they are worth it or just another thing I’ll end up washing every three days. Do they actually stay in place? Are some materials better than others? I’ve seen everything from super stretchy ones to quilted ones to full waterproof versions. Some even come with straps that supposedly keep them from sliding (though I’m skeptical). I also noticed a ton of designs on Alibaba while browsing fabrics, some cute, some questionable, but it made me realize just how many options exist, and now I’m overwhelmed. What I’m hoping for is something that: Doesn’t look like a giant bedsheet Actually protects the couch Doesn’t require Olympic-level tucking-in every morning Do sofa covers genuinely make cleaning easier, or am I better off deep-cleaning the couch regularly and calling it a day? submitted by /u/Udont_knowme00 to r/CleaningTips [link] [comments]

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/throwra_bumprint Originally posted to r/WhatShouldIDo My (35f) friend slapped my bum on a night out leaving a handprint. My husband (30m) doesn’t believe it was her. How to convince him? Thanks to u/soayherder for suggesting this BoRU Triggers Warnings: body injuries, emotional abuse, destruction of property Original Post: March 9, 2026 Went out for a friends birthday on Friday night and had a few drinks. Early on in the night I tripped over (before I’d even had a drink) and I ended up on all fours and one of my friends ran and slapped my bum. We all laughed and the night carried on and I thought nothing more of it. When I got home around 1am my husband was still awake in bed. I undressed to get in to bed and that’s when he noticed I had a hand mark on my bum. He instantly jumped out of bed and started demanding to know what it was and who did it. I stuttered a bit because I couldn’t even remember then it dawned on me so I told him what happened, but he didn’t believe me. He asked for my phone and obviously found nothing too serious but just said I’d deleted everything to cover my tracks. I went to the bathroom to have a look in the mirror and there was a definite handprint on there. He followed me and we stood there arguing for over half an hour and every time I tried to leave as I was cold and naked he’d stop me and accuse me of trying to run away. He said this doesn’t sound like my friend at all, which is true as she’s a very timid quiet person. He also said the handprint is too big for a woman but my friend is tall, she’s around 6 foot and does have big hands. I even ended up ringing my friend to corroborate my story and she even offered to come round and prove the handprint is hers by putting her hand on the print. He said we’d made up the story between us all and used the tall friend as the culprit as she’d have the biggest handprint. I asked the group chat if any of them had a video, but they don’t. All weekend we’ve been having this discussion and he doesn’t believe me. The handprint has gone now but he can’t let it go and keeps constantly asking me. It’s 4:45am here and he woke me up at 4 to ask about it. How can I make him believe me? I don’t know what to do. TLDR: friend slapped my bum and left a handprint. Husband doesn’t believe me and thinks it’s a man. Some of Relevant Comments Downvoted Commenter: Sue her for sexual assault, and file a police report. Legitimize it. OOP: No chance Commenter 1: I know this isn't what you want to hear, but he either trusts you or he doesn't. You can't make him trust you. OOP: This is what I don’t get. I’ve never given him a reason not to. Commenter 1: Has he been cheated on before? I can see it striking a chord if that's the case. If not, it sounds like projection...or red pill shit on social media OOP: Not that I know of. I said to him yesterday he’s projecting. Commenter 2: Is this a new behaviour or has he always accused you of cheating? OOP: First time he’s ever accused me of Commenter 3: What you should do is ring the bar, explain the situation & ask for the CCTV footage. If they say yes, make a bet with him of something that’ll hurt. “If it’s my friend you x if it’s a man I y. Do you want to take the bet or do you believe me?” You need to find something he’ll regret that’ll make him think twice about pulling this kind of bullying shit again but give him the opportunity to stop on his own. Then go look at the footage & hold him to it. Knock him back into his place. OOP: It was outside walking down the road. I tripped over a drain cover. Commenter 4: Sounds like your husband has some issues to begin with. You're allowed to go out and have fun with friends, it seems odd he just didn't believe you AND thinks all of your friends are in on it. Is there a history of cheating here? OOP: Yeah it’s starting to feel like projection to me. No nothing at all. I’ve never so much as looked at another man. Commenter 5: Ok so logically the facts, you couldn’t remember it happening even though you were sober , it would have to really hard to leave a full handprint , through clothing to have it still there fully 5/6/7 hours later . Slap your own bare thigh and it’s gone in an hour or so … He’s got every right to question it and the right to not believe you because it honestly sounds sketchy . Generally to have a full handprint , not bruised ( as you said it went away ) would have to be hard on bare skin . Is this post to make the story believable ? OOP: No because he won’t see this post. I was wearing a thin dress and a thong (an outfit he chose out for me I might add) and I was on my hands and knees so the skin was tight and I’m on blood thinners, so I do mark and bruise easily. All facts he knew. Commenter 6: Your timid friend just put you on the path to a divorce which I think is really ironic. I think it's also possible that your husband has been harboring resentment for late night girls nights out for a while, and this was the final straw. I do also think that his behavior and reaction is over the top and abusive. OOP: I go out 3 or 4 times a year. He goes out every weekend.   Update #1: March 15, 2026 (six days later) UPDATE My (35f) friend slapped my bum on a night out leaving a handprint. My husband (30m) doesn’t believe she did it. How do I convince him. To start with I’ll clear a few things up from my last post. My husband chose my outfit for me that night and it was a very thin dress with a thong underneath so there was very little protection of my derrière. I was also on all fours laughing so my bum was sticking up and then I heard footsteps running towards me and got absolutely thunder clapped on my arse. The sound echoed around the housing estate, and you know a slap is good when both the slapper and the slappee are in agony. All night that cheek was warmer than the other. I’m also on blood thinners which means I mark and bruise very easily. Second thing is my stammering when I told him. Might be TMI but I was doing a strip tease for him while he was in bed and as I let my dress drop I stuck my bum out so it was right near him and he screamed at the top of his voice “what the fuck is that!?” And then jumped out of bed and got in my face making me fall on to the bed and screamed “who the fuck did that!?” It took me a couple of seconds to realise what he meant. If he asked normally I’d have said “Emily slapped my arse”. Also I wasn’t drunk like so many people said. I had three glasses of wine over 6 hours. All the men who said a married woman shouldn’t be out without her husband, and there was at least five of you, are gross. My husband goes out every weekend but I do it three times a year and I’m “for the streets”. People asked about our sex life. We used to have sex or I’d give him oral nearly every day but the last few months it’s dried up to once a week. I have brought this up with him as I need it more. Also the not so serious thing he found on my phone, which a lot of men took to mean I’d been messaging someone else, was a porn video I’d favourited because I like it. Right on to the update. It’s been over a week, he still doesn’t believe me and I’ve told him I want to split up with him. Emily offered to come round on the night and he said no. I’ve told him to speak to all my friends and he’s said no. When I said look at the rip in my dress from where i fell and my bloody knees he said that’s from me giving head. How aggressively does he think I dropped to my knees? He’s looked through my phone and found nothing. When I asked to look through his he said “no I’m not the one on trial here”. He’s woke me up three times in the night to berate me. He’s burnt all my going out clothes. He’s threatened to post photos and videos of me to show the world what a slag I am. He’s also grabbed me twice and pushed me on to the sofa once which I will be informing my brother about later when I see him for Mother’s Day. So all in all a shit week and I’ve told him to get the fuck out of my house and I’ll be divorcing him. He’s not worked for six months and has no savings and the house was mine before I met him and he’s never paid towards the mortgage or any repair or upkeep work so he’s getting fuck all. Relevant Comments Commenter 1: Can't work without trust. And he actively does NOT want to trust you. So... Bub-byyy! PS, I hope everything from here on out works out for you. OOP: That’s pretty much what ive said. I’ve never been treated as untrustworthy in any aspect of my life and I don’t like it Commenter 2: Girl get security cameras and for sure talk to your brother. If anyone shoved or laid hands on my family I wouldn’t even care about the jail time id face. OOP: I’ve already got them around my house and got dog watching cameras inside. Downvoted Commenter: I will never understand why women waste their time and life with men like this. He can't even afford to get upset. Make better choices OOP: He’s never acted like this before. This is the first time. Am I supposed to see in to the future? Commenter 3: He chose your outfit, he sent you out in the most provocative outfit he could. He's not been having sex with you as much as you'd like lately, and he jumps straight to you cheating. I reckon he's been cheating on you and wanted to set you up so he could claim you cheated on him. Then he can leave the relationship to be with his mistress. OOP: I think you’re right. Commenter 4: He's accusing you because he has something to hide for sure. He's messaging girls, watches OF, something. He's definitely thought about cheating. Good for you taking out the trash. OOP: I genuinely don’t care if he’s watching porn or subscribing to OF but there’s something going off if he won’t let me see his phone. Commenter 5: He refuses to accept the truth because it damages his ego. He is doubling down and refuses to be proven wrong. OOP: I said that’s why he won’t talk to my friends because he’s too proud to be wrong. Commenter 6: Sounds like he’s been cheating. Also weird that he hasn’t worked or put anything towards the house… no savings? Good riddance, the trash took itself out. What a bum. OOP: He was at uni when we met and since has floated around jobs and that’s it Commenter 7: good for you. You have to divorce him. How long were you married for? How did he take it? Imagine him having to explain why he's getting divorced--he threw a fit about the dumbest thing ever. OOP: Been together ten years married for four. He didn’t seem to care. Commenter 8: I bet your bottom dollar, he will walk away and (through divorce proceedings) you will end up having to pay him in lieu of equity for the house. OOP: I won’t pay him anything. It’s different here in England. The house predates him and any payments towards it have come from my bank account.   Update #2: April 1, 2026 (2.5 weeks later) UPDATE 2 my (35f) friend slapped my bum on a night out leaving a handprint. My husband (30f) doesn’t believe she did it. How to convince him? I’ve had a lot of messages from people asking for an update so here it is. It’s a pretty uneventful one as nothing has happened but I’ll try and clear things up. In my first update I mentioned kicking him out and he’s still out and I haven’t heard from him at all. My brother did go to see him and his brothers after Mother’s Day so maybe that’s why I haven’t heard from him. I did take some advice then and had new security cameras installed and lighting all around my house and changed every lock. I know it’s a bit paranoid but I’ve also screwed my letter box shut and got a postbox outside so he can’t pour anything nasty through there. I also change my company car every couple of days in case he’s put a tracker on it. I’m really overthinking it but just being sure. I also was a bit petty and posted a picture on my Instagram of me on all fours and Emily with her hand on my bum lol. I’m not sticking up for my ex here, but I do want to clear up the issue of him choosing my outfits. That’s always been my idea. I saw it on a film when I was younger and always thought it seemed sexy my partner choosing an outfit that they find me attractive in and it makes me excited to get home in it so he can see me in it again. I’ve also had a lot of messages from both men and women, sadly, insulting me for being out at that time and saying it’s embarrassing a woman of my age behaving in such a way. I’ve also had a few women message me and tell me that I’m a whore for doing a striptease for my husband and I’m degrading myself. No it’s not degrading to try and turn my husband on so he’ll bang me until the sun comes up. Women enjoy sex too. Anyway thank you everyone for caring it really means a lot ❤️. Relevant Comments Commenter 1: I hope you put in a police report about him pushing you around, destroying your clothes and threatening to post videos of you. You need it on record in case it escalates. OOP:It won’t escalate as I’m not with him anymore. Commenter 2: Has your man always been ok with you going out like that without him? I’m just curious OOP: Yeah never an issue before. In fact he’d encourage it. He goes out every weekend and it was never a problem on the odd occasion when I did. Commenter 3: What do you mean “your” house? You mean HIS house, that HE is payimg for? OOP: No MY house that I bought before I was with him and that he has never paid towards the mortgage or repairs on. How misogynistic that you assume because he’s the man he’s paying for it. He hasn’t worked for six months and when he did he earned minimum wage. Commenter 4: Take a vacation. Just leave for a while. Don't tell anyone who speaks to this man where you are going. Absolute silence will help cool the situation hopefully. Also install a camera outside that looks onto your front doors. This guy sounds like a real loser. Stay safe and don't let him a second of your time. If he has stuff at your place dump it at someone else's house and let that person say they have his stuff . Check your phone for tracking software to. Stay safe OOP: I’m already booked to go to Karakow next week anyway. OOP responds to multiple downvoted comments about Mother's Day isn't until May OOP: Not everywhere is America.   DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7 THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP submitted by /u/Choice_Evidence1983 to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

submitted by /u/EarlyChest2260 to r/IndianCats [link] [comments]