Mens Business Casual Outfits

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My good friend of ten-plus years got married and decided to have a low-key wedding, very intimate at City Hall with immediate family only. Afterwards, she had a very casual party for 100ish people. It had been really hot in the city where her wedding was held for the last few weeks and part of the casual party was in a garden in the baking hot sun. I bought this beautiful, two-piece high-waisted midi skirt and crop top (they almost met in the middle, so very little skin was shown) the base colour was cream but they were very brightly floral in pattern and only tiny pieces of cream poked through orange and earth tones. The problem was it was so hot, 100º+, that while in the hotel garden for cocktail hour, I absolutely sweated through the back of the top and obviously didn't want to spend the whole party like that. So I went back to my room and changed into the only other outfit I had... super colourful pallazzo pants and a pressed white linen shirt. At the wedding my friend didn't speak to me but it was a big day and she had so many people to host that I completely understood she was just too busy... but it has now been a few weeks and quite unusually I haven't heard from her at all. I just thought she was settling into married life... they didn't go away, but maybe they were honeymooning at home... until another friend told me that actually the bride is beyond annoyed that I wore white to her wedding. I always assumed not wearing white was so you didnt look bridal, and I certainly didn't... there were also many men who had ditched their jackets in the heat so were wearing white shirts... Ill be honest it didnt even occur to me that it would be an issue, but maybe being thoughtless makes me an AH? Edit.... i can't add a pic but this is pretty much the outfit that caused problems. Wedding Guest Outfit https://www.reddit.com/u/Impossible-Sand9749/s/WXQ4x3azJZ Edit Number 2: I went to see if I could find a pic of the original outfit... and I completely misremembered the colours... it wasn't even a bit cream, the background was pink. submitted by /u/Impossible-Sand9749 to r/AITAH [link] [comments]

Hi folks, I am a 28 year old women. I am currently unemployed, but , like most people my age, any job I have ever had does not require me to dress more formally than business casual. I have a lot of sensory issues with clothing, and my biggest issue is my skin is very sensitive to fabric, especially on my thighs. I'm not sure if the issue is worse on my thighs because the skin there is more sensitive, or if it's because when I sit down the material presses against my thigh and itches. I don't officially have eczema, this is likely just related to my ADHD, which causes sensory issues a bit like Autism does. Anyway. There are two major workarounds here. Chinos instead of dress pants, or a long skirt with cotton tights underneath ( as office skirts are rarely made of cotton). I prefer the long skirts anyway, because I am also Muslim and it's much easier to construct a modest, feminine outfit with a long skirt. The rare cases in the past where I had to wear a suit, I just wore cropped cotton leggings under unlined suit pants, and it's fine for a few hours, but not ideal overall. I know that in the past, women were stuck with suits, or worse, mandatory pantyhose. Even in the 2000s business casual, chinos had the green-light for men and not for women. I guess a longer skirt with cotton bike shorts underneath was the workaround then, but I digress. Anyone with fabric sensitive skin? Eczema? Dermatitis? How did you cope with office wear? Did you just have non stop rashes? I feel like this is a better question for women, since men's suit pants are traditionally looser, making it easier to have longer boxer shorts underneath, or have some kind of soft lining underneath. Women's pants ( or pantyhose mandates) seem less flexible. submitted by /u/Mei_Flower1996 to r/AskWomenOver50 [link] [comments]

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The quick framework: Business casual sits between smart casual (jeans + sneakers okay) and business formal (suit + tie). The test: could you walk into an internal meeting without adjusting your outfit? If yes, you're in the zone. 5 core pieces that mix across the week: Crisp button-down shirt (white, light blue) Knit polo or refined polo (navy, charcoal) Tailored pants or chinos (navy, charcoal, olive, khaki) Cardigan or light sweater (charcoal, camel) Loafers or clean leather shoes (brown, black) The Do/Don't boundary: ✅ Oxford shirts, chinos, dress trousers, cardigans, loafers, derbies ⚠️ Dark jeans (only if office allows), minimal sneakers, short-sleeve shirts (keep collar structured) ❌ Graphic tees, hoodies in client settings, distressed jeans, flip-flops, athletic shorts Mon–Fri rotation example: Mon: Button-down + navy chinos + loafers Tue: White shirt + charcoal trousers + derbies + cardigan Wed: Knit polo + olive pants + loafers Thu: Oxford + cardigan + dark chinos + Chelsea boots Fri: Casual button-down + tailored pants + clean shoes We wrote the full thing with a formality ladder and shirt/pants selection guidance here: https://coofandy.com/blogs/guides/business-casual-for-men-2026 Happy to discuss specific office situations or questions about where your workplace might fall on the spectrum. submitted by /u/Coofandy to r/Coofandy_FashionStyle [link] [comments]

We've been researching interview attire across different industries, and the clearest principle we found is this: Dress one half-step more formal than employees on a normal day. Not two steps up. Not matching exactly. Half a step. What that looks like: Their team wears hoodies + jeans → you wear a button-down + chinos Their team wears business casual → you add a blazer or upgrade shoes Their team wears suits → you wear a suit You're not sure → go slightly more polished, keep styling quiet The "always works" formula: Solid white or light blue button-down Dark dress pants (navy, charcoal, gray) Leather shoes that match your belt Optional blazer if the company leans formal Format adjustments: Video calls: solid colors, good contrast against your background, avoid tiny patterns that flicker Panel interviews: notch up slightly — add the blazer, simplify accessories Second round: match or gently elevate your first outfit, don't make a dramatic change Common traps: Never trying the outfit sitting down before interview day Fragrance that fills a room Overdressing so much you look like you're from a different company Underdressing because "tech is casual" (casual ≠ sloppy for an interview) Full guide with detailed matrix and fit checklist: https://coofandy.com/blogs/guides/men-job-interview-outfit-guide submitted by /u/Coofandy to r/Coofandy_FashionStyle [link] [comments]

At someone's advice in r/AskGayMen, posting here: Take pity and help out a gay mom (ie, mom to a gay son). I know the standard answer is "khakis and a button down." But read on, intrepid reader. Where are young gay guys doing their business casual shopping, first for an interview and then possibly a summer job? The guy in question simply. will. not. wear. slim pants, ie, standard khakis/chinos from places like J Crew or Bonobos. He says I'm allowed to say "he's a twink"--but only ironically--re style. He's super cute (I say objectively) in his wide jeans and slim t-shirts. But that's not going to cut it for an interview for a tech job he really really wants. Oh, and did I mention he has to have this interview outfit by Monday? And he's working a different job tomorrow through Sunday so will have shop after work? Good times. Specific styles/brands much appreciated. Many thanks, men of r/nycgaybros! submitted by /u/F13nd1sh to r/nycgaybros [link] [comments]

In the rapidly evolving landscape of 2026 menswear, the "business casual" dress code has undergone a significant transformation. No longer is it defined by the absence of a tie; rather, it is defined by the intentionality of the tie you choose. The modern professional understands that a necktie is no longer a corporate mandate, but a strategic tool used to communicate authority, personality, and an eye for detail. When building your wardrobe strategy for this year, two heavyweights often compete for space in your drawer: the Solid Silver Tie and the Patterned Tie. One offers a sleek, monochromatic minimalism, while the other provides depth, texture, and character. To navigate 2026 with confidence, you must understand exactly where each fits into your rotation. 1. The Case for the Solid Silver Tie: Minimalist Authority The solid silver tie is the undisputed champion of high-contrast sophistication. In 2026, the trend has shifted away from the shiny, "prom-style" satins of the past toward deep, matte textures and subtle jacquard weaves. Why It Works A silver tie creates a "light-reflecting" focal point that works exceptionally well under the cool-toned LED lighting found in modern corporate offices. It is a power move that feels lighter and more contemporary than a traditional solid black or navy tie. The most important factor when choosing a silver tie today is the finish. Opt for a matte silk or a grenadine weave. A flat, overly reflective silver tie looks dated and cheap. A textured silver tie, however, suggests a man who values "affordable luxury" and understands the nuances of high-end fabric. Best Use Cases: High-Stakes Presentations: When you need to be the center of attention, the silver tie provides a clean, distraction-free frame for your face. Evening Work Events: It transitions seamlessly from a 4:00 PM meeting to a 7:00 PM cocktail mixer. Monochromatic Styling: Pairing a silver tie with a charcoal suit and a crisp white shirt is a foolproof way to look like the most important person in the room. 2. The Dominance of the Patterned Tie in 2026 Strategy While the silver tie is your specialist tool, the patterned tie is your daily workhorse. In the current 2026 business casual environment, texture and visual interest are the primary currency of style. Patterned ties allow you to bridge the gap between "stiff corporate" and "effortlessly professional." The Rise of the "Micro-Pattern" The most strategic patterns for 2026 are geometric micro-patterns, foulards, and subtle florals. These designs appear solid from a distance but reveal intricate detail as someone approaches. This "discovery" factor is a hallmark of sophisticated dressing. At La Mode Men's, we emphasize that every purchase should empower your ambition. Choosing a patterned tie from our curated collection: such as the Patterned Tie #5: shows that you aren't just following a dress code; you are mastering it. Why Patterns Win for Business Casual: Versatility: A patterned tie that incorporates multiple colors (e.g., navy, burgundy, and gold) can be paired with a wider range of shirts and blazers. Approachability: While solid silver can feel cold or "shield-like," a pattern: especially a floral or a soft geometric: makes you appear more approachable and creative. Camouflage: Practically speaking, a patterned tie is far more forgiving of the minor spills or wear-and-tear that occur during a busy workday. 3. Mastering 2026 Coordination: Ties, Knitwear, and Chinos The "2026 Business Casual" look is heavily reliant on unstructured tailoring and high-quality knitwear. This is where your choice between solid and patterned becomes critical. Strategy A: The Tonal Solid Look If you are wearing an unstructured blazer in a bold color: perhaps a forest green or a deep rust: a solid silver tie can act as a neutral anchor. It allows the color of the jacket to speak without creating visual clutter. Stick to solid ties when your outfit already has significant texture or color elsewhere. Strategy B: The Patterned Contrast If your outfit is grounded in neutrals (a navy blazer, white shirt, and khaki chinos), a patterned tie is non-negotiable. It provides the "pop" that prevents the outfit from looking like a uniform. Pro Tip: In 2026, we are seeing a move away from skinny ties. Opt for a classic width (approximately 3 to 3.25 inches) to maintain a balanced silhouette with modern, wider lapels. No matter how stylish your suit is, a skinny tie in 2026 will make the entire ensemble look like a relic of the 2010s. 4. The Verdict: Which is Better for Your Strategy? If you are forced to choose just one direction for your 2026 strategy, the Patterned Tie is the superior investment for daily business casual wear. Its ability to harmonize with the earth tones and textured fabrics currently dominating menswear makes it the more versatile choice. However, a well-rounded wardrobe requires both. Think of it this way: Patterned Ties are for your 9-to-5, your client meetings, and your daily office presence. They build rapport and showcase personality. Solid Silver Ties are for your "closing" moments: the interviews, the galas, and the days when you need to project untouchable authority. The 2026 Action Plan: Audit your current collection: Remove any shiny, narrow, or outdated silk ties. Invest in three core patterns: One geometric, one repp stripe, and one subtle floral in rich hues like burgundy or forest green. Add one "Power Silver": Find a high-quality, matte silver tie with a rich texture. It will be your secret weapon for the most important days of the year. Conclusion: Lead with Purpose At La Mode Men's, we believe that dressing well is a form of self-respect. Whether you choose the sharp minimalism of a silver solid or the expressive depth of a pattern, the goal remains the same: to look sharp and lead with purpose. By selecting pieces that prioritize quality and fit over fleeting trends, you ensure that your style remains timeless. Explore our full range of men's ties today and find the piece that will define your 2026 strategy. You are capable of achieving great style; all you need are the right tools. submitted by /u/lamodemens to r/LaModeMens [link] [comments]

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This is a stupid question, but I have high anxiety with new things and want to ask: But I just landed my first job in a more professional field, and will begin having to dress business casual. I don't want to go to the wrong place and get rinsed, or look like a child wearing his dad's shirt. Any suggestions of an affordable place to start where a guy can walk out with a couple outfits? submitted by /u/CatapultJesus to r/ottawa [link] [comments]

First | Previous | Next Patreon | Official Subreddit | Series Wiki | Royal Road The Nexus. Just outside of the South-Eastern edge of the North Rythian Forests. Local Time: 1700 Hours. Emma [‘QUEST’ Time Elapsed: 76 Hours. Time Remaining: 92 Hours] [SURVEY PROGRESS… 12.5%. Estimated Time to Completion… 21 Hours. Data Fidelity: Nominal. Network Integrity: Stable. Primary Objective… Pending.] [Crystal Shards… Not found.] [AMETHYST DRAGON… Not found.] “Welp. Progress is progress. But as long as we keep up this pace, we should be on schedule.” I let out a tired sigh, gesturing to a screen that had once again caught Thalmin off guard. Though it wasn’t as if he was still in awe of either the screen itself or battlenet, nor was he surprised by the disappointing lack of progress, no. In fact, this squint… was a reaction I was used to seeing from both friends and family back home. It was a squint of judgement — whether by intention or biological reflexes — at the horrors of my personal preferences. Or to put it more accurately, at a certain screen setting that seemed to be the source of so many grievances — light mode. I’d practically flashbanged Thalmin, because unlike the brightness of the day, the growing evening had since sensitized his eyes to the dark. “I much prefer it when the ink itself is what glows against the natural tones of the parchment.” He mumbled out, my eyes narrowing at the allusions to the existence of a magical dark mode. “I don’t know how you humans do it, though I do know of more than a handful of species who have quite a natural inclination towards the light…” He muttered that latter line out in much the same way he did with the rest of his inside jokes; a trend that I was slowly learning to brush off. “In any case, we should be done with a full sweep of the forest by 1400 hours tomorrow. After which, we’ll have enough intel to dictate our next course of action. Hopefully we’ll find a stray shard by then, but if not… just under two days should be enough to snipe the dragon, no?” “We’d have to track it first, Emma.” Thalmin responded with a sigh. “Yeah, yeah. But that’s what battlenet is for! We have eyes in the sky looking not just at the ground, but the airspace above—” [PRIORITY ALERT! MULTIPLE AERIAL CONTACTS ENTERING THE AO. APPROACH VECTOR CONFIRMED: GRID SECTOR A-1-4-D; NORTHWEST QUADRANT!] My eyes lit up, as did Thalmin’s. All prior thoughts took a backseat to protocol, as operational algorithms drilled into me during drone operator training were immediately brought to the forefront. “Active camo and evasive flight paths, now.” [Acknowledged.] “Defer active ops and initiate threat-range scans.” [Acknowledged. Instructions relayed. Network Integrity: Stable. Redirecting assets. Standby…] The map shifted as the game changed in a matter of seconds. The familiar top-down perspective of the forest was promptly replaced by a panoramic view of the skies immediately in front of the drones, as individual status readouts, flight paths, and flight instrument indicators came to join the collage of tactical displays that had Thalmin’s eyes darting left and right. I couldn’t blame him, though. I had the same reaction despite the false confidence mil-sim titles had instilled in me. That’s why drone operator training took a sizable chunk of basic. The role of Swarm Queen wasn’t inherited but earned. Owing in no small part to the tried and true grind of experience, forged through the accumulation of FPV and C&C hours. The rest was good, old-fashioned neural plasticity, allowing one to get used to perceiving the world beyond the restriction of one’s own two eyes. [Fleet Redirection… complete. New flight paths… mapped. Network Integrity: Stable. Awaiting Orders.] “QSR: Identify contacts.” [Collating… Processing… Confirming… 3 Large Contacts… 12 Light Contacts accompanying in formation.] [TRACK ID: Winged Heavy 1-1, 1-2, 1-3] [TRACK ID: Winged Light 2-1 through 2-12.] “QSR: Signature profile.” [Visual: Winged Heavy 1-1, 1-2, 1-3, inconsistent with AMETHYST DRAGON and other recorded flight-capable species in the WORKING SPECIES REGISTRY. Winged Light 2-1 through 2-12 consistent with Local Aerial Asset: ‘DRAKE RIDER’.] [Thermal: Elevated, inconsistent with known aircraft. Consistent with local mounted air asset analogues.] [Mass/Volume: Large Contacts approx. 5 - 10 metric tons. Smaller Contacts approx. 400 - 700 kilograms.] [Payload: Underbelly Stowage Compartments Noted on Large Contacts. Repositioning for better analysis. Standby… Parsing… Updating visual feed… Analyzing… Design and configuration congruent with cargo/passenger cabins. Summary: Potential personnel and/or equipment transport.] “QSR: Tactical Profile.” [Unable to parse… Insufficient contextual data. Profile is beneath acceptable inference limits.] “QSR: Visual Tactical Readout.” [Winged Light 2-1 through 2-12. Ranged Air-to-Air Assets: > 24 Spears; Ammo Count: 24. > 12 Bows; Ammo Count: Variable, approx. 30. > Melee Arms: 12 Swords. > Armor: Plate Steel. ADDENDUM: Possibly augmented with exotic mana-materials and radiation. Capabilities unknown.] “Maintain current instructions. Continue monitoring.” [Acknowledged.] “Live feed readout. I want to see where this goes.” [Acknowledged.] Our eyes remained glued to the screen as the situation developed surprisingly quickly. The three large contacts simply dropped off their wood-and-steel-reinforced ‘cabins,’ unlatching leather and steel straps before departing without much fanfare. Meanwhile, 8 of the 12 drake riders departed soon after, acting as escorts for their large but lumbering cousins. The initial shock and preliminary concern that hit us eventually died down, especially as the remaining drake riders landed on the forest floor, taking up ‘resting’ positions with their wings flared and their heads tucked. Their two legs eventually folded in on themselves as well, giving them a sort of ‘loaf-like’ shape once their wings too were nestled beneath them. “Must be another group of adventurers.” I offered. “Sym did mention how he encountered a few dead parties in the forest.” “No. These must be men-at-arms, or a proper mercenary company at the very least. No adventurer, no matter how ostentatious, would ever in their right mind charter a greater drake.” Thalmin countered. “Right. Well… that might complicate things then.” I acknowledged with a sigh. “I don’t see anyone resembling a proper noble in the camp, though.” Thalmin offered, as he gestured for me to zoom in on several people down beneath the canopy. “There may be one from the looks of it. But I highly doubt that. No Nexian noble would oversee an operation of a diminutive scale. I’d wager this quest is being led by a few chosen ones, if not more.” The prince shrugged. “Either way, what this means for us is simple — expect slow progress on behalf of these interlopers. But given their numbers and outfitting, we shouldn’t leave anything to chance. You said we had 21 more hours until the forest is fully surveyed, correct?” “Yeah.” I nodded. “Then this changes nothing. Just make haste if you can, Emma. If we are to initiate ‘Plan B,’ as you call it, then we must act swiftly. We cannot allow these interlopers to take the dragon before we can extract what we need from it.” “Right. Okay. I’ll get the drones back in their original flight paths. Though if those drakes ever take flight again, I will have to reconfigure them to more evasive flight patterns, if only to avoid detection.” “Understandable.” Thalmin nodded. However, before he could move on, a question suddenly spawned. “Before—” “I’d like to—” Or more accurately, two questions simultaneously, as the both of us spoke at more or less exactly the same time. Thalmin “You go first.” Emma urged. “This may be a bit of a tangent, so I’d suggest you go first, Emma.” I countered politely. “Trust me, mine’s a tangent as well, so—” “To avoid an endless loop, I will take that offer.” I interjected with a harsh breath, before gesturing to the tablet in front of us. “That entire… exchange. Between your commands and the messages on your artifices, is this how you typically communicate between you and your swarm?” “Yeah.” Emma nodded. “Remember how I changed the scenery in the ZNK-19? This is more or less the same concept, just scaled up.” I narrowed my eyes, pondering a response as I once more leaned into the manaless window. A window… into the eyes and ears of what was frankly a swarm. Thoughts upon thoughts abounded one atop the other, with practical concerns clashing against the shore of intrigue, eroding what was already firm suspicion into outright conspiracy about the nature of Earthrealm. Or more accurately, the nature of their military capabilities. However, in spite of everything, all I allowed out of my mouth was a simple acknowledgement. “I see.” Instead, I took a moment to pause, to ponder, as I watched through the looking glass at the world through the eyes of a swarm queen. Each ‘perspective’ was composited — a mosaic of sights that resembled the world as seen through the eyes of bees, wasps, and any number of oddly eyed insects, their vision as alien as the manaless artifice through which it was relayed. I let out another breath before shifting my perspective back to Emma. “I simply feel the need to ask, as the abilities displayed here seem… seamless, practiced, rehearsed, and dare I say it, second nature. This wasn’t a simple command relayed to a static sightseer. This was the direct control of multiple manaless golems, as seamlessly as if they were an extension of yourself.” “Yeah, well, that’s because it kind of is! As in, mental adaptability is something that’s useful for us. You put someone in charge of a bunch of far-seers in a building, and they eventually come to ‘feel’ as if the building itself is an extension of them, you know? Same goes for helmsmen and ships, pilots and aircraft, and so on and so forth. Drone operators — i.e. most frontline personnel — are trained similarly. We have to integrate seamlessly into battlenet, because a second’s hesitation or delay might be what makes or breaks an engagement.” I took a moment to ponder that, to truly examine the seemingly spiritual connection between the human and their constructs. In a sense, it wasn’t unlike the bond between myself and Emberstride, or the soulstitched or soulbound bonds in many other battlemages, warriors, and knights. Yet as similar as it was, there was still… an unnerving alienness to it. Whatever the case was, I simply acknowledged the swarm queen’s sentiments with a nod before throwing the proverbial talking stick back to her court. “Your turn.” Emma “So, you mentioned chosen ones. I’ve heard this term thrown around a lot, especially at the adventuring guild. But no one’s really… explained it to me. So I've just kinda been going off of context clues and what we’ve learned about gifted commoners so far. Are chosen ones just another, more ‘fancier’ way of saying ‘gifted commoners’ or…?” “Correct, Emma.” Thalmin nodded. “Although, the term ‘chosen one’ is more often synonymous with gifted commoners who enter more martial paths. As opposed to, say, our elf server in the grand dining hall who’s only committed to using his magic for parlor tricks.” “How big of a threat are we talking about here? Because up to this point, I’ve only gone up against mages in challenges and whatnot. A proper fight is something I’ve only encountered once with Mal’tory and that was—” Thalmin snickered, stopping me in my tracks. “What’s so funny?” “If you survived an encounter with a Black-Robed Professor, I doubt you’ll have any issues against a mere Chosen One, Emma.” Thalmin bellowed out confidently, patting me on the shoulder. “Though, that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be on our toes, of course. I’ve met many a chosen one who punched well above their weight class — using enchanted weapons and tools as crutch for their magical limitations, seamlessly integrating with them. To the point where the typical commoner might even mistake them for a mage at first glance. Though, typically, once you see a chosen one in action, you’ll know exactly what to expect. Since in the same vein that gifted commoners are ‘gifted’ with a single narrow sliver of magical acumen, so too are chosen ones confined to a very small sliver of magical potential.” “Right.” I nodded, my mind racing through the implications of this newfound intel. “Just so we’re on the same page, supposing there’s a guy who’s able to do fire magic, he’d more or less be locked to just fire magic, right?” “That’s simplifying the matter, but for our purposes, you’ve struck the kobold on the head there, Emma. There are, however, always exceptions to the rule. Such is the case with the jack-of-all-trades. But those are exceptionally rare, and usually only seen in illegitimate offspring between nobles and commoners.” The prince explained bluntly. “Even then, these individuals are still very much orders of magnitude weaker than true mages, but I digress. Suffice it to say, Emma, we’ll be fine.” Thalmin beamed, thumping his chest. “Look who you’ve partnered with, after all.” “Yeah, fair enough, my mercenary prince.” I chuckled. The next few moments were finally punctuated by silence as we watched the camp grow tent by tent. The drones counted at least a hundred or so contacts, and as dusk fully settled, quite a few peculiarities popped up. Most notable among these was the erection of some sort of altar at least half a click from the camp, with offerings wrapped in parchment carefully placed on each pedestal. “Erm… care to fill me in on that, Thalmin?” I pointed. “Oh, that’s just an offering, Emma.” The prince explained casually. To which I could only respond with an accentuated cock of my head. “Elaborate.” “An offering to placate the forest itself, Emma. To ward off potential… negative reactions to what could otherwise be perceived as an incursion of its territory.” I blinked rapidly, cocking my head. “Is that an actual thing, or a superstition?” “You’ve interacted with the forest face-to-face with one of its avatars, have you not, Emma?” The prince countered, as it took a second for my mind to finally register what the prince was getting at. “OH RIGHT! THE WEREBEAST!” I attempted to snap my fingers, only to elicit an unsatisfying motion that puzzled the lupinor. “Right, yeah, I remember now. So that actually was the forest talking through it, then? It never occurred to me to follow up on that, thinking it was just like, the werebeast being all high and mighty about himself.” “The werebeast might’ve merely been the most convenient enforcer at the time, I suppose. Though I can’t say for certain. Frankly, a forest is often an enigmatic force of nature unto itself. With some primitive cultures even going so far as to consider them gods of sorts.” Thalmin shrugged. “Though, given His Eternal Majesty refused to consume them — instead forging some sort of an alliance or some such — I doubt they’re anywhere near the level of deities.” “So what can we expect from the forest?” I immediately shot back, my mind still very much stuck in rapid response and assessment mode. “Are we looking at, like… an immune reaction or something? Vines and tendrils shooting up, moss to consume us whole, sinkholes forming, and slime creatures attacking?” “We’re not facing a druid, Emma.” Thalmin responded with a hefty chuckle. “If anything, we have no need to worry given the makeup of our current party. Forests typically do not target small groups, so long as they do not actively seek out their destruction. Moreover, with you being effectively lifeless in its eyes, there’s even less chance of it targeting us. Indeed, the presence of a far larger, more unsightly group in its Northwest region, will take up much of its attention.” I narrowed my eyes at Thalmin, crossing my arms to make up for the lack of facial expression to convey a certain level of doubt in the prince’s claims. “So… burning a good few acres of forest doesn’t count as actively seeking out its destruction, huh?” I chuckled darkly, alluding to a certain fight against a vorpal chimera. The prince surprisingly didn’t immediately counter this with an excuse or a loophole. Instead, he let out a nervous chuckle, a sly grin forming on his face in short order. “Heh, well… you could say I overlooked the potential consequences of my actions in the heat of the moment.” I placed a hand on the prince’s shoulder, gripping it tightly. “Spoken like a true orbital ordnance officer.” The prince’s brows quirked at this, possibly at the EVI’s attempts to translate the joke, but I counted it as fair game given the inside jokes he’d been leveling at me for the past week. Things wound down after a few more back-and-forths, our eyes still very much monitoring the situation over in the camp from above, until we finally noticed something else that caught our attention. “Huh. That’s a heck of a lot of cheese.” I noted. “I guess they had a run-in with our new friend.” Thalmin smiled brightly. “He’s quite a salesman, so it stands to reason that he must’ve made quite an impression on our interlopers here. Probably sold most of his stock from the looks of it.” “Yeah! Honestly, good for him.” I beamed as I quickly patted the pouch that held the little notebook the kobold had gifted me. I can’t wait to see the upgrades to your cart and wares once we meet again. I thought brightly to myself. Dragon’s Heart Tower, Level 23, Residence 29. Ilphius and Kamil’s Room. Local Time: 1730 Hours Ilphius “Kamil.” I announced firmly, making my presence known with a SLAM of the doors. “It’s time you came out of hiding.” … Yet no answer came. I let out a frustrated sigh, clenching my fists, before unleashing fury in the form of disruption, disorientation, and dispelling magics which would’ve caused even the most stoic of mages to lose their footing. The result was immediate. Though not in the way I’d expected. Yaaaawwwwwnnnnnnnn! A voice strained from within one of the corners of the room as the lazy layabout finally uncloaked, focusing his two beady eyes on me. “I’m guessing your second and final proposal with Lady Airit did not go as planned?” The coward spoke with a lizard-like lisp, as a smug, self-satisfied giggle colored his voice. “At least I had the courage and mental fortitude to take chances.” I rebutted. “At least I exist in the material world.” I continued as I leveled both ire and frustration firmly against the wayward noble. “Yes, yes. Exist you do. Perhaps you should allow me to return to my immaterial world then—” “Stop.” I urged, my voice colored not by desperation, but authority. This did the trick, as the barely present lizard reacted without a second’s hesitation. His instinctive response to authority, true authority, was laid bare to me. “Whilst Lady Airit may lack vision, playing things safe as her master tends to do, I am unwilling to let this opportunity slip us by. This is why I am reassessing the situation, and requesting your cooperation in enacting my plans.” I stated firmly, eliciting a disgusting and debased roll of the lizard’s tongue as he seemed to mock my occasional tongue-flared hiss. “I sssseeeee.” He responded jeeringly before stretching his arms and legs lazily in all directions. “Convince me.” “Excuse me?!” “You heard what I said: convince me. I have no horse in this race, Lady Ilphius. The worst you can do is to interrupt my sleep and scatter my belongings… but it isn’t as if you aren’t already doing that now, are you?” He chuckled derisively, causing my whole body to tense and burn from the inside out. “When my plan succeeds—” “If.” “No, when it does.” I seethed. “When it does succeed… I will be in a better position to retake the peer group’s throne from that wretched merchant. And when that time comes, I will make sure to elevate our group, to push us forward, and to place us in a position where we can challenge the earthrealmer’s group for a position in the house we were robbed of.” … “Sounds quite ambitious…” “Indeed it is.” I acknowledged. “And by ambitious I mean tiresome, Lady Ilphius.” The man yawned. “I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to do this on your own.” “I’ll unmask Teleos Lophime’s secret. I will uncover what it is he’s hiding in the healing wing.” I offered. “Hmm… now you’re speaking my language. Though you’ll have to give me more than just juicy drama to eat up.” Kamil chuckled darkly. “Coin.” I spat out. “Coin, you lazy, whiny, layabout—” “Carte blanche.” He countered. “Whatever spoils we may potentially earn from this escapade, yes.” I pushed forth a secondary counteroffer. To which the man finally relented with a long, drawn-out nod. “What’s your plan?” “I know there must be something that might incriminate the pair. That wretched and tainted avinor is most obviously a beacon of darkness. And the Vunerian? I’ve heard whispers of him slithering off to the libraries for some enigmatic purposes. Our task is to follow these two blighted beasts, and to determine once and for all what devious rule-breaking, or perhaps even law-breaking schemes they may be up to.” “Huh.” Kamil responded simply. “That’s easy enough.” “Indeed, and with your masterful camouflage skills, this will be even more—” “We’ll start tomorrow then. I’m tired from today’s classes.” He yawned once more. “No.” I seethed, grabbing him by the half-transparent arm. “We’re starting today.” The Transgracian Academy for the Magical Arts. The Grand Dining Hall. Local Time: 2000 Hours Ilphius “Ahem.” Kamil interrupted, tugging at my uniform as he did so. “Are you certain the pair are up to anything—” “It’s just dinner, Kamil. Maybe if we trail them after this, we will see just what illicit activities they’re up to.” I intercepted the man’s concerns before he had a chance to fully voice them, as I continued eating, bite by agonizing bite, while maintaining a careful sentry on the pair. “You know you’re only resorting to such passive actions because without Lady Airit or Lady Ladona, you simply don’t have the power to go toe-to-toe against—” “Keep quiet!” Dragon’s Heart Tower, Level 23, Hallway. Local Time: 2200 Hours Ilphius “It’s curfew now. We have to go back.” “I was certain they’d have gone anywhere but back to their room! Are you sure we did not follow phantoms? Or maybe we might have missed their subtle exit through some other—” “Yes, I’m certain, Lady Ilphius. You’re talking to the master of camouflage here.” Kamil responded lazily. “Alright. We’ll just resume our sentry tomorrow.” “And if nothing comes of tomorrow?” He countered. “I have other avenues…” The Next Day The Transgracian Academy for the Magical Arts. The Grand Dining Hall en Route to ???. Local Time: 0900 Hours Ilphius “Still nothing, Lady Ilphius.” “Patience, Kamil! Look! They’re leaving!” “And what makes you think they’re not just heading back to their dormitory?” “Because look—” I pointed urgently at their path. “—they’re taking the main stairwell this time around.” “Which means what exactly?” “They’re headed to the student lounge.” “Oh joy.” Kamil sighed quietly. The Transgracian Academy for the Magical Arts. Student Lounge. Local Time: 1200 Hours Ilphius “And I said, ‘Panned cakes! It should be called panned cakes! For the cakes were made in a pan.’ But my private chef, in their infinite stupidity, refuses to acknowledge this, pushing forth a narrative of pan-cakes instead! Tell me, my dear fellows, are the cakes not panned? For a cake to be a pan-cake, it should somehow resemble a pan or in some way—” “He’s been at this, on the speaker’s chair, for hours now, Lady Ilphius.” Kamil bemoaned. “Are you certain this is what you seek?” “No… but what of the avinor—” “She’s been silently reading a book, sipping tea and eating nuts, occasionally being interrupted by the freaks from the fourth nook only to be rebuked. I’ve kept my other eye on her this entire time.” “Patience. Patience, Kamil. We will have our evidence.” The Transgracian Academy for the Magical Arts. En Route to the Library. Local Time: 1400 Hours. Ilphius “There it is, there it is! We must follow him!” I urged, as we both silently scouted our way forwards, ducking in illusory magics until the Vunerian had entered that most unholy of places. We waited for several minutes more until we made our move, walking across the bridge and then entering the den of unspeakable evils to continue our investigation. Yet upon entry, we were met not by the scurrying of the increasingly pale-blue Vunerian, or any sign of him whatsoever. Instead, what awaited us was a small fox that looked up at both of us expectantly. “State your business! Do you wish to browse or to trade?” The fox questioned before moving up to sniff at the both of us, as if our illusory magics weren’t even there. “Hmm… neither of you seem to have anything to trade. Rather stale, honestly.” “How dare you—” “I’ve heard it much before, yes yes. Grumble and grumble, moan and whine. Let’s skip to the end now, shall we? Are you here to browse or to trade?” We both looked at each other before nodding. “Kamil, you—” “I’ll browse, please.” The man sighed, eliciting a nod from the fox, who simply… vanished the moment I turned to look back. “I’ll keep an eye on the avinor. We’ll meet for dinner.” “Right.” The Transgracian Academy for the Magical Arts. The Grand Dining Hall. Local Time: 1900 Hours Ilphius “Well look who finally decided to show up…” I hissed softly at an exhausted-looking Kamil. “Found anything?” “No. I barely got out of that impossible labyrinth!” He seethed. “The deal’s off, by the way. There’s nothing in it for me. The fun’s over.” He crossed his arms. “And I doubt you found anything interesting about the avinor either.” I moved to speak… but found that I had nothing at all to say. “No, I have not.” I stated plainly. “But I have one final plan to enact…” I offered, garnering the man’s attention. “...what is it this time?” “The pair, they are both here, are they not?” “Yes, they are. What of it?” “This makes for the perfect opportunity to… investigate their den of sin.” “You can’t be serious. You can’t just break into another dorm.” He countered. “Au contraire. I can… and I will. And whatever is in there… I shall have my spoils.” The Nexus. Southeastern Quadrant of the North Rythian Forests. Local Time: 1900 Hours. Emma The relative ‘downtime’ that was the past 26 hours felt a heck of a lot like the fulfillment of one of Aunty Ran’s sayings. A lot of war is a whole load of sitting around doing nothing. Except for the one percent of times where all hell breaks loose and you’re fighting within an inch of your life. You use that 99% to prepare for the 1%. Or at least that’s what they say. I just prayed that we wouldn’t experience the latter half of that anecdote. [‘QUEST’ Time Elapsed: 102 Hours. Time Remaining: 66 Hours] [SURVEY PROGRESS… 100%. Estimated time to Completion… 0 Hours. Data Fidelity: N/A. Network Integrity: N/A. Charging. Primary Objective… Pending.] [Fleet Status: Charging.] [Crystal Shards… Not found.] [AMETHYST DRAGON… Not found.] “Right, do you want the good news or the bad news, Thalmin?” “We’ve been sitting around waiting for your drones to do most of the work. Let’s at least get some good news, Emma.” The prince grumbled. “Right, well, good news! Our interloper friends have not detected our presence, nor our drones. That’s even with their Shatorealmer flying around. Also, the drakes seem to be in hibernate mode or something. They’ve only flown them once, though granted it knocked a good few hours off of our survey time.” “Okay… I’m assuming the bad news is that there’s no stray crystal shard.” Thalmin sighed out. “Correct.” I nodded. “Damnit.” Thalmin cursed. “Well then, it seems like we’ll just have to go dragon hunting now, won’t we?” He managed bravely under a nervous grin. “Once the drones are charged up, I’ll be redirecting survey efforts towards tracking down the amethyst dragon’s lair. Given we have the whole forest mapped out now, it shouldn’t be too long before we narrow down a list of POI’s—” [PRIORITY ALERT! MULTIPLE AERIAL CONTACTS ENTERING THE AO! RANGE… 1400 METERS!] My blood ran cold as I tapped Thalmin on the shoulder, shooting him a look which he could not interpret. Though I wouldn’t need to, because what happened next brought the man up to his feet. “AGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!” As a bloodcurdling scream, followed by the unmistakable FWOOOOSH! of fire erupted about a click north of our position. We had only one drone in the air, but that’d have to do. “QSR: Identify contacts.” [Estimated Count: 1 Large Contact] [TRACK ID: AMETHYST DRAGON] I felt my stomach clench as my arm moved to activate the railgun. Though I only did so out of precaution— [Estimated Count: 2 Small Contacts] [TRACK ID: Winged Light 2-1, 2-2.] —because we weren’t alone in this engagement. We didn’t need to watch what was transpiring on the tablet, as the action was close enough that the light foliage of the canopy allowed for a near-unimpeded view of the skies. Two drake riders were attempting desperate sorties against the dragon, as they moved to corral, slash, and even ensnare the dragon with rope, netting, and just about everything but the kitchen sink. This was all in a desperate attempt to save their ground forces from the brunt of the dragon’s fury, as we saw a small group of elves, dwarves, satyrs, kobolds, and even baxi desperately attempting to flee from the dragon’s ire — away from the wall of flames that halted their advance. However, with every advance towards a potential exfil route, the dragon shot out another line of fire, corralling them towards a path of its own design. It was as if the dragon was doing this on purpose, as if it was actively playing with its prey, giving them a false sense of hope of escape… only to snip that thin thread of reprieve away with the unbridled fury of dragonflame. We both watched in silence as this group of mercenaries was eventually boxed in, their last exfil route completely bathed in flames, leaving them in a literal box of fire that only grew closer and closer, with no potential of being put out. Though it wasn’t as if they didn’t try. As one of them — a blue-robed satyr — attempted to spray down the flames with some healthy jets of water, all to the tune of some weak bursts of mana radiation. The dragon, noticing this, flew low and slow, almost hovering in front of the satyr. The bassy BOOMS of its wingbeats shook the air, accelerating the ferocity of the raging inferno, sending even Thalmin’s fur into a shiver and my gut into a knot. Their eyes met, and in what I could only describe as a snort of amethyst embers and soot, it roared. SKREEAAAUUUUUCHHHHHHH!!!! A crackling noise soon followed, sparks haphazardly illuminating the dark of its throat. Then, a subtle ping of a mana radiation spike. Finally, a sudden FWOOOOSH enveloped all auditory channels. … Bright blue dragonflame, orders of magnitude larger than the satyr’s jet of water, vaporized everything it came into contact with… The water— Skkksshhhhhhhh —the foliage— Crackle! Hiss! —and finally, the satyr and his forward scouting party. Their screams were short-lived. But even so, the chorus of guttural bellows and bloodcurdling shrieks echoed into the night, each note and octave searing deep into my core. “Emma—” I heard a distant voice calling. But my body was frozen, my eyes staring blankly at the impressions of boots and hooves rendered into baked clay on the forest floor. “EMMA! We have to move!” Thalmin shouted, breaking through the haze of shock, as he attempted to shake me out of it. I blinked rapidly, staring at his finger as he gestured to the dragon moving to gain altitude, with the two drake riders in hot pursuit. This was our chance to tag and follow it. So without a second thought, I acknowledged Thalmin’s urgings. “Right.” Before quickly turning to the EVI. “EVI. Send the survey drone after it. Observe maximum threat range and stay clear of its sightline." “Query: Specify survey drone.” “The one we currently have in the air! SUR-DRONE03B—” I paused, my heart skipping a beat as I noticed something pop up on my HUD. [SUR-DRONE03… STATUS… CRITICAL DAMAGE… REQUESTING RETRIEVAL AND EXFIL] I craned my head up, following the ping of the lost survey drone, until I was met with the dragon roaring overhead. ROOOOOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRR! And while its roar tore across the silence of the night, a familiar red pulse emanated from a crevice on its back — a tiny antenna piercing deep into the empty dark. First | Previous | Next (Author's Note: And there we have it! :D The dragon makes its appearance, alongside a certain missing drone from back during the warehouse explosion! :D I hope you guys enjoy the chapter! :D The next Two Chapters are already up on Patreon if you guys are interested in getting early access to future chapters.) (Author's Note 2: Here's the Updated Map for Emma and Thalmin's progress so far! :D) [If you guys want to help support me and these stories, here's my ko-fi ! And my Patreon for early chapter releases (Chapter 150 and Chapter 151 of this story is already out on there!)] submitted by /u/Jcb112 to r/HFY [link] [comments]

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/Princessprotect posting in r/AITAH Concluded as per OOP 1 update - Medium Original - 17th October 2024 Update - 4th July 2025 AITAH, for calling out my husband for changing up the rules in our open marriage? I (35f) am in an open relationship with my husband (36m). It was over the summer he mentioned it to me. I wouldn't say I was totally for it but it took some getting used to. Now everything is going great but recently my husband keeps changing the rules. Once I started dating Evan (45m) that's when he started acting differently. My husband and I agreed on a dont ask don't tell policy but,keeps pestering me about the details of our relationship. I give him a little here and there but never the explicit stuff. Everything positive I mention about Evan he downplays or critiques. Last week, I planned a date with Evan and asked him to watch the kids. He agreed. He was to get back home by 9 but texted me to say he's doing overtime that night. I was left scrambling for a sitter at the last minute. This isn't the first time he has done this. Luckily this time I got a hold of a sitter but I could not stay as long as I was hoping for. Afterward, he acted as if everything was okay. He began policing me when I left the house and began picking my outfits apart. Expressing concern about how the neighbors would perceive me. To avoid conflict, I started wearing jackets to cover up before heading out. Then came the issue of Evan dropping me off. He worried about the neighbors seeing a strange car pull up at night. This forced me to do lunch dates. It wasn't a bother. I would bring my laptop to Evan's and work at his place.However,I preferred the dinner dates because I got a chance to dress up more. Changing up the times seemed to alleviate some tension but I still feel like I was compromising too much. He didn't even want me to drive to the dates but when Evan pays for an Uber or drops me off it's an issue. It makes no sense. The breaking point was when Evan sent flowers to the house. My husband lost it claiming it's dangerous for a strange man to know our address when we have kids inside. I will say he was right about this. I did drop the ball however, he insisted that I shouldn't bring home any gifts at all going forward, arguing it violated our don't ask don't tell rule. He used to joke about me not getting chivalry in my open relationship and now that I'm getting dates it's a big deal? I asked him if he doesn't take the women he sleeps with on dates and he said no it's strictly sex and none of that "lovey dovey bullsh**" that I'm doing. I confronted my husband about these rules and he just brushed it off like it was nothing. Saying "it's just a respect thing" I was really enjoying this but he's sucking the fun out of it and it just feels highly stressful. Comments myweechikin Your husband wanted to have a wife and to still sleep with whomever he liked. He didn't want that for you. Come on now, surely you realise that? clackagaling to me, it seems like husband wanted NSA sex with people other than his wife without any of the emotions that come with either an additional girlfriend or hurting his wife. however, wife found someone who also respects and appreciates her, and isnt using her like a hole like how husband is doing his part of the open relationship. so i think this is extra incensing for him, he’s emotionally removing himself just to get extra pussy, she found someone who will put up with the weird rules and treat her well. it’s not just the sex, it’s that she’s getting treated well. myweechikin Yeah, not everyone can enjoy sex with random, one night strangers. Clearly that's not her bag, and he should have known that. Or maybe he did and that's why he thought it would all fall into place nicely for him. Maybe he thought he could have it all while she was at home not sleeping with anyone else Dapper-danimal NTA. Question: Does your husband actually hook up with other women? Reading between the lines I wouldn’t be surprised if things weren’t working out for him. If this is going to work, you can’t just agree to “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” and call it a day. Rules have to be in place. If he only wants sexual relationships outside of the marriage, without emotional intimacy, that’s a fine rule IF you agree to it. It’s also fine to change the rules after they’ve been established, but that should be based on a conversation where everyone is on the same page. He shouldn’t be able to change or establish the rules on his own and get mad that you haven’t been following them. OOP: I think he does he dresses up on the weekend to go out and comes in late. We both agreed to Emotional intimacy/ ONS/ casual. It’s just the nitpicking that’s too much. I don’t mind having a discussion but when I’m met with “it’s not that serious” that’s when I get pissed. Corpuscular_Ocelot You need to see this for what it is. He opened the marriage w/o understanding that it meant you would be going "on dates" too. He never wanted the rules to be fair, so starting from that premise is only going to get him subverting any discussions. He just thought a out all the fun he would be having. Now he is treating you like shit because he can't stand that what is good for the gander is good for the goose. You need to bottom line it for him: Open marriages are not easy to maintain. Most couples can't handle it. The only way to handle it is to set clear rules and follow them. One thing I will say is that your partner needs to be your primary, so if both of you are putting all your efforts into getting laid outside of the relationship, you will trash the marriage. You need regular date nights and check-ins, etc. It also takes a lot of trust and respect for your partner. In other words, you need to put work into your marriage to make it work, open or closed. There is plenty of literature out there on how to make this work if you really want it to, but it is work. Opening a marriage isn't a "quick release valve" to save a marrige for people who aren't good and communicating and take their spouse for granted. **Judgement - NTA*\* Update - 9 months later You guys were right, this was a shit show. I'm not sure where to start but we are getting a divorce.He infact did not change and became way more possessive and controlling while changing the rules. Everything I did was either wrong or inconsiderate. Evan had planned a weekend trip to Cabo to celebrate a new business venture. I asked my husband if he was okay with it weeks in advance. He enthusiastically agreed mentioning I deserved the trip he even told me to make sure I "flood his phone" with pics. I told him I was going to stay with Evan the night before for easier commute, he insisted on taking me to the airport instead. Since it was our last night until Tuesday. However, when it was time to leave he overslept! Despite urging him to get up to the point that I pulled the covers off and turned off the air he spent an entire HOUR in the bathroom. Then to make matters worse he didn't fill the tank!! I told him the evening before. I called an uber which was another hour late but luckily I got to enjoy my trip. I let it slide and moved on. Boy oh boy I wish I never went on that trip because things got worse. It's like I was being punished for the trip. He became incredibly invasive in my personal relationships. He wanted to know what my sex life with Evan was like. If he was better etc. he used to play it off like it was not a big deal to him then I caught him snooping through my phone. It was too much. I didn't understand because Evan was no longer the only man I was seeing but Evan triggered him the most. If that wasn’t enough he had his friends over for boys night, I was getting ready for girls night. Before I left he said out loud “ You’re really gonna leave me to go fuck him” in front of his friends! The embarrassment and humiliation I felt, even typing this. I just sat in my car and cried so much and that’s when I knew it was done. He apologized mentioned he was drunk. I don’t buy it one bit. He has never acted like this. This open relationship has left me drained mentally and emotionally and it wasn’t even my idea to begin with. I have filed for divorce but he keeps begging for reconciliation but I can’t. Before anyone comments I know you told me so. Sigh. Comments AcanthisittaBoth8524 he didn't want an open marriage, he wanted your permission to sleep with others while you were not allowed the same. NTA then or now Enjoy yourself Christinemfm_84 This nta, op if he ever says anything in front of people again call him out and say he was the one who wanted to open the relationship. Your husband wanted to sleep around and didn’t realize you’d be having fun too. AcanthisittaBoth8524 I also wonder if it's not working out for him as much as he hoped it would Christinemfm_84 Yeah he probably slept with whoever he wanted to sleep with and it wasn’t as great as he thought and he isn’t getting as many girls as he thought he would. Boo-Boo97 Isn't that how these stories usually go? Husband demands open marriage so he can screw around, discovers that he's not that attractive and women aren't lining up to be with them while their wives are picking up guys right and left. Then demands their wives stop meeting others and the wives meanwhile have found there are much better men out there than the assholes they married and file for divorce. I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP. Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments submitted by /u/SharkEva to r/BORUpdates [link] [comments]

I was at a work event labeled business casual and got a surprising amount of comments on my outfit being "out of place" or something similar. I wore a fitted black button down polo (not athletic material or golf shirt) tucked in, light beige dress pants, a nice watch, nice brown belt, and matching brown dress shoes. It was a Friday afternoon event outdoors in Europe and 85 degrees as well if that matters. Almost all the women wore sleeveless stuff but 90% of the men wore jackets, and a handful of them made comments about if I knew what the dress code was. Nothing serious since it was just passing comments from coworkers but I found it a bit strange since I was always under the impression that a high quality collared shirt with pants and nice shoes meant business casual. Almost everyone at the event was American as well so it's not some European thing. Obviously next time I'll wear a jacket to fit in, but was my sense for what was acceptable off? Edit to add that this is pretty much the exact outfit https://i.pinimg.com/564x/9f/f2/91/9ff291c8ea41afc62c24f411f0ca9c58.jpg submitted by /u/rraddii to r/mensfashion [link] [comments]

I (25F) just got offered a pretty huge promotion at work, from being a coordinator for one business unit to becoming a global coordinator. It’s a big jump, both in responsibilities and salary. I’ve been promoted every year since I started here (it’s been 3 years), and this role is honestly something I never thought I’d reach this soon. It would be a big deal financially and career wise. The only catch is that it involves some travel.. The company is actually trying to reduce travel costs, so it wouldn’t be constant. We have four business units in different parts of the world (Europe, Asia, South America), and I’d probably go to each once a year, for about a week each. So in total, like four weeks a year. My boyfriend (32M) is not really okay with that. He didn’t give me a direct ultimatum, but when I brought it up again after he already told me how he feels, he basically said that if I keep pushing for something he’s clearly not comfortable with, then I must know what I truly want and that I should just pack my bags and leave. It really hurt to hear that. I get where he’s coming from though, he wants a stable life, someone more family focused, and he’s been upfront about that since the beginning.. but so have I about not wanting kids untill 30. Thing is… I’ve started to care more about those values too since being with him. But at the same time, I’ve always dreamed of having a successful career. I’ve worked my a.. off for this. And honestly, if teenage me could see where I could head towards now, doing work I love, getting recognition, making good money, and even getting to travel - she’d be amazed by the oportunity.. I don’t want to choose between love and ambition. I really care about him and I don’t want to lose what we have. But I also don’t want to say no to something I’ve wanted for so long and then spend years wondering “what if.” AITA for wanting both? LATER EDIT First of all, thank you so much to everyone who took a few minutes of their lives to share their thoughts with me. I know I asked strangers on the internet for advice, but I often feel overwhelmed and stuck in my own head, and your objective perspectives really help bring some clarity… I am sorry I couldnt reply and keep up with all the messages.. I honestly did not expect so many responses omg :o I tried to talk to him and find some kind of middle ground..I explained that it is only four weeks per year abroad, and that I already spoke to my manager to make sure the traveling will not exceed 10 percent of my working time. But now it seems like that is not enough either… He is starting to bring up other issues, not just the traveling. He does not like that I might need to adjust my working hours to match other time zones. While that is partly true, I would still only work 8 hours a day, just maybe on a different schedule once a week. He is also worried about the people I might meet, especially the men. He does not like the idea of me going to dinners with clients. Or sleeping in hotel rooms alone, because he might not be able to join me on each work trip (also he told me he wont accept me going on dinners while he waits for me in the hotel room). He does not like me talking to coworkers during breaks, which is why he insists I call him on every break I get. He gets annoyed if I do not reply to his texts right away or if it takes me 30 minutes to answer. He wants me to send him my calendar daily so he knows exactly when I have meetings. And if I do not let him know about every single work related conversation with men, whether it is with coworkers, suppliers, or trainers, he gets upset and says I am hiding things. He has very strong boundaries when it comes to my work. No becoming friends with male coworkers, which I accepted without issues- cuz anyways I dont socialize at work at all, no casual/funny tone in messages or emails, no emojis, no hanging out after work, no sharing personal numbers with male colleagues unless he agrees with it. Two weeks ago I went to a three day training in another city. I had to commute four hours every day because he did not want me to sleep at a hotel. On the last day, one of the participants suggested making a group chat so we could keep in touch professionally. I forgot to mention it right away, and when I told him the next day, he got mad and made me get up at 1 a m to show him the chat. He is just very jealous when it comes to my professional life. All this because before I met him, one of my coworkers, a man, became a good friend. I had to cut contact and block that person once we got together. And I have never given him any reason to doubt me. Sometimes I feel like giving up everything and just getting a basic job, like working in a supermarket. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but I mean quitting the career I love, just so he will finally stop trying to control me. But then I remember how much I love what I do and how lucky I am to have found something I am passionate about. LATER EDIT2: sorry this will be long. For anyone wondering how I didn’t see it until now, I honestly think it was gaslighting. Never thought i would say this but some strangers (some menaing 10 K holy shiiii) made me realize how fucked up my life is. Looking back, here’s the stuff that happened... At first, everything felt amazing. But even in the first couple of months, I noticed he was kinda possessive, but then i thought he was sweet and caring, especially coming from a relationship with a distant, cold, and indifferent boyfriend.. I’ve always had more of an avoidant attachment style, so his need for closeness felt like a lot, but I tried to adjust. He quickly started pushing me away from all my guy friends. Within six months I had blocked literally all of them. We moved in together and he slowly started micro-managing my whole life. When he was at work (13 hours without his phone), he expected me to write him down in our insta convo everything I did - like when I left the house, went to the store, had an appointment, got home .. so he could basically see a full timeline of my day. He got in between me and my family too. Suggested I only visit them while he was working, so I wouldn’t “waste” any of our time together. I had to go everywhere with him, even if it meant sitting in silence while he hung out with a bunch of dudes talking about stuff I had no connection to. He started giving opinions on how I looked. Told me I lost too much weight. Then told me I gained weight. After surgery and a long recovery, he pressured me for three months straight to get back in shape. Wanted us to be a “gym couple” like him. In the first year I wasn’t even “allowed” to go to the gym unless it was with him. He checked and validated my outfits before I left the house. And I dress super modest - more like a old nanny, not at all revealing -but he’d still say certain clothes were too transparent or not appropriate if light hit them a certain way.. Told me I’m too pale and should go to the tanning salon. Told me I dress better at work than at home, and that it bothered him that i get cosy whenever i get home. Then he started getting WAY TOO involved in my job - asked me to share my daily meeting calendar, text him constantly through the day, explain why I go on-site instead of working from home. Told me to only take home office days when he was home. Give him way too much information about who X,Y,Z is, why do I have to work with him, why is anything part of my job, so on... He read my emails, checked my work messages, my work phone, my gallery, contacts - and the same on my personal phone. Always fixated on convos with guys, never with girls. Slowly, he took over all my time. It felt like my entire day belonged to him. I left him twice. Packed my stuff, went back to my parents. And I came back both times. I ve had health issues every couple of months since moving in with him the first time. Before him, I was almost never sick. I have struggled with irritable bowel syndrome, acne, hair loss, 2 warts, an abscessed hair follicle that had to be operated on three times, ear infections, gluten intolerance, gingivitis, candidiasis twice, ovarian cyst infections, and weekly migraines. Honestly, I think my body started screaming what my brain wasn’t ready to accept. GET THE FvCK OUT I AM HURTING I know some of you might judge me more now after reading all this. But please believe me when I say I really didn’t realize what was happening. I thought I was exaggerating. I thought this was just “what relationships are like.” I thought he would change. That he’d see how much it hurt me and try harder. That he’d start appreciating all the compromises. I never imagined someone could manipulate you this deeply while yelling at you, punching walls, throwing water on you (yes this did happen). And yeah, I made a lot of mistakes too. I wasn’t honest with him many times — because I knew the reaction would be explosive. So I hid stuff. I went to the gym without telling him. I vaped and didn’t tell him because he banned from the begging vaping, alcohol and clubbing. I lied and said I had in-person meetings at work just to get a break from the house he was in and leave. I even told him I had a car payment just to avoid explaining where my money for vapes and helping my parents went. And I believed that I deserved all of this because of the lies. I still kinda do. But I know that I want to break this cycle. I want to get better. I want to deserve someone better someday. Because i haven't, and I still don't. So thank you to everyone who’s been messaging me. I haven’t read every single comment, but 99.9% of the ones I did hit me like a slap in the face -in a good way. Each one opened my eyes a little more. So thank you. Fck it, no matter how manipulated you are by a narcissist, when ten thousand strangers tell you to wake up... you do. Now I see things clearer. Tomorrow I have a session with my therapist — the same one we saw in couples therapy. She knows the dynamic. We're going to work on a safe exit plan. I’m scared, but I know this has to end. submitted by /u/ThrowRAxbx to r/AITAH [link] [comments]

My sister-in-law is a single mom of a young daughter and 14-year old son, “Will”. She’s doing a great job but has expressed concern about raising her kids without a father figure, especially Will. He’s a good kid but easily impressionable. Over the last year or so, my wife and I have been involving her kids more. I’ve taken Will under my wing to show him the stuff he’ll need to know as he grows up. We’ve done car maintenance, fixed things around the house, and yard work. He really seems to enjoy it. One thing we recently talked about was the importance of appearance. Like most young people these days, Will wears a lot of hoodies, pajama pants, and flip flops. I took him shopping and bought him some dress shoes, button down shirts, khakis, and a suit. He was so excited for the suit and planned to wear it to church on Easter. He talked about it for weeks. My sister-in-law law recently started dating this guy named “Tyler”. I’ve only met him once, but Will said he was decent. He only recently met the kids and started spending time at their house. The four of them showed up to church on Easter looking upset. Scowls on all of their faces. They also looked like they had just rolled out of bed. Tyler was wearing wrinkled jeans and a T-shirt and Will had on a hoodie, flip flops, and sweat pants. My SIL and niece were dressed similarly. After church, I asked Will what happened and he told me that they had an argument. Will had just finished getting dressed when Tyler came over to drive them to church. He saw Will’s suit and made him change clothes because he was only wearing jeans. Tyler also convinced SIL not to wear the dress she picked out and to keep her outfit casual. Will protested and they had an argument all the way to church, during which time Tyler threatened to take give “those bougie clothes to Goodwill or some shit”. He also told Will he looked “gay” and “stupid”in his suit and that “nobody dresses like that”. I told him not to worry, and he could try out his suit later on, but boy was I pissed. I don’t really know Tyler but I fell like he was overstepping…..big time. He hasn’t been in their lives for that long and he’s already subordinating them and talking crazy. I got upset but my wife urged me to leave it alone. I didn’t. Since we were all going to dinner after church, I wanted nip it in the bud. I pulled Tyler to the side to talk. I don’t believe in arguing or embarrassing another man in front of his woman and kids. This was supposed to be a talk between us, away from everybody, to get an understanding. I calmly explained my concerns and he instantly bucked up, claiming that he runs that house…not me. I reminded him that they aren’t married and he cannot treat my SIL, niece, and nephew like that. It quickly escalated into a shouting match and drew a crowd of parishioners to the parking lot. It ended with him going to jail for assault (he shoved me into a car and I punched him in lip before we were pulled apart). I had no idea things would escalate as they did. It was embarrassing for everyone. But I don’t feel bad for standing up for my nephew. I’m not his father, but I’ve known him all his life. I don’t like seeing some jerk-off guy come into his life and tear him down instead of building him up. If Tyler was a longtime boyfriend or stepfather then sure…..his house, his rules. But this behavior is a major red flag. What kind of man is jealous of a child’s outfit and makes him change? What kind of man threatens to give away a child’s clothes and calls a kid derogatory names? And what kind of man fights at a church he’s visiting for the first time? I told my wife she needs to talk to her sister about her choices in men. She refused and said she stopped doing that years ago and made her peace with her sister not wanting her input. I’m not sure if SIL will take him back, but I told her that Tyler has displayed violent tendencies and she should reconsider her relationship. I’m not trying to control her or her decisions. I’m just concerned that Tyler may be a hothead. She says I’m an asshole for trying to tell her who to date and it’s none of my business, but added that she will do the best thing for her family. Whatever that means. My wife says that she is proud of me for standing up to Tyler, but thinks I did it in the wrong fashion. I think I did the right thing and Tyler was in the wrong. AITAH for how I handled this? AITAH for trying to give my SIL a warning? submitted by /u/623450 to r/AITAH [link] [comments]

I am NOT the Original Poster. That is ThrowRA49594. She posted in r/AmItheAsshole and her own profile. Paragraph breaks added for readability. Do NOT comment on Original Posts. Latest update is over 7 days old. Mood Spoiler: shit hits the fan Original Post: February 4, 2025 Hello! Longtime lurker, first time poster here. I (25F) went to a friend’s wedding a few months ago. The friends are Matt (25M), and Susan (25F). We’re all part of a much larger friend group that gets along pretty great. To preface, I have actually never attended a wedding before in my life, and I don’t tend to dress up or put on makeup. Nothing against it, it’s just expensive and time consuming and I work 16-hour days in a uniform. I was really excited when I got the invite, saved up, and went to a shop I know carries my size (I’m fairly tall). The clerk was amazing and so helpful. He chose a selection of dresses that would be wedding appropriate that weren’t close to what the bridal party would be wearing and we had a lot of fun trying things on and he hyping me up. One of the options I just fell in love with. It was a beautiful dark green silk “bias-cut” dress (think Kiera Knightley in Atonement, without the sash and less of a flowing skirt). We matched it with heels and I’d never felt prettier. The dress was on sale too, so that was a plus! Wedding day comes and it’s lovely. I’m so happy for my friends. Susan ignores me, which is weird, but she’s busy preparing and then the wedding is in full swing and the reception is busy so I don’t think much of it. Everything goes off without a hitch and they drive off to their honeymoon. I suppose it’s relevant, but I received several compliments on my outfit during the event. I didn’t think it caused a scene, and it wasn’t anything particularly effusive or over the top. I was doing the same to others so I didn’t think it stood out. Everything concludes, we all have a nice time. No one says anything until tonight. We all got together for a “Welcome Back!” dinner for Matt and Susan. During the dinner Susan kept making snipes at me about what I wore, just incredibly passive aggressive. It was very clear she thought I overdressed. I didn’t say anything at the time because I felt terrible. None of my friends corrected or stopped her either. But looking back on it I feel… wronged? She didn’t give me the benefit of the doubt and I don’t feel like my dress was over-the-top. I do think I likely look very different from how I normally dress and present myself, so that might be part of it? I’m trying not to go over the word limit but am very open to questions and elaborations if needed. So Reddit, AITA? TLDR: wore a nice dress to a wedding, the bride is angry ever since. AITA? Some of OOP's Comments: Commenter: Info: Was there a stated dress code? OOP: The invite said “formal” and I knew it was going to first be in a church, and that the reception would be in a local hotel that looks like a castle and is quite fancy (though I’ve never been). Commenter: NTA. You're tall and you don't normally "girl-up". If the bride felt like you were trying to "steal thunder" it's likely due to her own insecurities. Your dress was appropriate for the event you were at, it's just that you probably were stunning and that may have shocked people who never look at you that way. Either way...not your problem. OOP: I was deliberately going for something very unadorned because she was wearing a ballgown with flower and rhinestone appliqué (I think that’s the term?). Her dress is a lovely dress, and the reception venue was PERFECT for it (effectively a castle). OOP's dress: I actually haven’t seen the movie, so I don’t know the intent, it was just the closest match I could find while googling trying to find the dress. I tried googling other dresses that looked similar, but most of them have a big thigh slit, which mine doesn’t. I just didn’t know how common “bias-cut” is as a descriptor while also being accurate to my dress. To another commenter: Pretty similar [to the Atonement dress] but a bit less (midback rather than lower back, which isn’t unusual for dresses to my understanding)? Also brought a simple black little jacket to wear with it since it was a winter wedding and we moved venues, but didn’t wear it the whole time understandably. Commenter: Bias-cut isn’t much of a description of a dress at all, it just means the material has been cut at an angle. OOP: Ah shoot then I don’t even know if that’s correct. That was my conclusion after consulting google trying to find the dress and then something close to it when that failed. Commenter (downvoted): The dress in attonement is pretty attention seeking. It was deliberately chosen in the movie and created a splash amongst viewers. So I'd say YTA. The wedding wasn't your moment. OOP: Very fair! It wasn’t my intent, but well could have been the impression and result. Were other women wearing cocktail dresses or gowns? OOP: About 50/50. I definitely wasn’t the only one. But I’d say the wedding was very male heavy, so 5 men per 1 woman I think. She had a huge bridal party so most of our mutual female friends were part of the bridal party (so I’m not counting their long dresses) or not invited. Commenter: I see a lot of american women wear short dresses to formal weddings which baffles me, formal to me means long dresses. Maybe thats why?? But if more women, other than the bridesmaids, wore long dresses and she isnt mad at anyone else but you… thats weird OOP: She’s not mad at anyone else that I’m aware of, but apparently some friends DID talk to her so she’s mad at them now Commenter: Hmm, interesting that it was a predominantly male attended event. Based on that plus the way she treated you it sounds like Susan is definitely not a girls' girl! OOP: I think that’s a multi-factor thing: Susan and Matt come from big families with mainly brothers. She’s not in contact with her mother. Our friend group is largely male and then on top of that some of our friends are gay so more men as a +1. I know she got in a fight though with some girls so she uninvited them to the wedding, and pretty much all the rest were bridesmaids. I’m not the closest with her, personally, so I was just happy to be there. To clarify the last bit: happy to be there versus being in the bridal party. We’re friends but not the closest as some of me and the other girls/guys are. Commenter: tbh, you went to a dress place and had the employee recommend dresses. Presumaly a qualified employee helping you pick out a dress would not have recommended a dress in which you would upstate the brid/which would be over the top for a wedding guest. OOP: I did show him what the bride was wearing and that we had to avoid reds (bridal party colour) so we wouldn’t have anything remotely similar. He was honestly a sweetheart. Not in a pushy salesman way but really hyping up and helpful. Commenter: exactly! You went to someone qualified to suggest appropriate options and showed him what the bridal party was wearing (and presumably told him the dress code was formal). It is this person's job to help people select appropriate wedding attire, and if he's at all experienced he'd know that some brides can get jealous and controlling. He would not have recommendd a bride upstaging dress. It seems to me like you did the appropriate thing. OOP: Yes and honestly the height was an issue. A lot of the shorter dresses are just too short on me and look indecent or just weird (not lying where they should) and it’s way easier to hem something than make something longer (not that this one needed hemming). You’d think it’d be the other way around when shopping for dresses but that hasn’t been in my experience. And yes omg he was so kind & lovely. Update Post: February 6, 2025 (2 days later, on OOP's Profile) So shit has hit the fan. Turns out: the dress didn’t matter at all, pretty much. Just brought some old shit up, I guess. Bear with me because I’m trying to piece things together and dealing/venting. Some info I’ve gotten directly, some secondhand, and not all at the same time. Got some from texting friends, others reached out, and I talked with Susan on the phone. Alright, so, apparently this is relevant: I come from a fairly abusive situation. Not the worst, but still not great. Add one some religious trauma and since a young age I’ve been pretty relationship averse (and do not date casually or hook up with folks) and a staunch atheist. Believe what you want to believe, that’s fine, but it’s not for me, yeah? How does this apply? Well, Matt (you might be getting a creeping suspicion at the root of the issue about now) is VERY Christian. Not an asshole about it, but he’s been very clear that’s the type of life he wants to live and he wants to be a pastor. So a FULL ON DECADE AGO, he asked me to a school dance - we didn’t know each other very well yet. I told him no because my parents didn’t let me go to those. He then asked if we could date and I gently turned him down because a) again my parents wouldn’t have allowed it, and b) I knew I didn’t want to live a religious life (I knew he was very religious). THIS WAS A DECADE AGO. We didn’t become friends or anything then (that came later because my best friend started to date one of the guys in the group, and our two friend circles merged). He dated people in between then as well, so like, a little awkward but rarely ever thought about it. We were 15! Time passes, he starts dating Susan. Susan and her friends join the group. Everything is fine! We get along okay, not the closest but good! There’s some drama but I’m not usually in it, and honestly I am really busy with Uni and work. Then just work. But apparently Matt told Susan that he had asked me out - no clue if he told her WHEN it was - and this DID bother her. I was oblivious. And yes, some of you were right. She is insecure, she also has anxiety. Matt, apparently, would get annoyed at her anxiousness when she’d call him crying, and in the moment would be supportive, but then after would compare her to me?! (WHY??) Things like, “Yeah, you should be like [OP], she doesn’t stress about things like that.” Like sorry, but I’m gonna be real with you here - getting followed by a creep on a train is VERY different when you’re 6’ and take martial arts, versus 5’01” WITH ANXIETY. Not fun either way, scary all the time, BUT CAN YOU BLAME HER FOR CRYING?? (Sorry I’m a little pissed). So I’m guessing she built up some sort of resentment towards me but never told me. Again, I’m oblivious to all this going on. Covid happens. He proposes. They wait a bit more for marriage. She invites people to the wedding and does not want me as part of the bridal party, which again, we’re not the closest so I’m unfazed. Maybe a bit of sadness, but her bridal party is large and with girls closer to her, so I don’t mind. My best friend is aware of some of the subtext going on here (because of her BF, the same guy mentioned earlier), so she doesn’t get along well with Susan, and have a fight (unrelated) around this time so Susan says she’s not invited and my friend doesn’t care, she’s going to be abroad then anyways. She also kicks some girls from the bridal party because they were apparently “talking shit.” about the relationship but I know very little about this (all third-hand). So from what I can get from the conversation I had with Susan is that she thinks me asking about what the bridal party and she were wearing was a dig, somehow. And that I chose green deliberately so that I’d stand out from the bridal party and her (her dress had red accents here and there) in the opposite colour. Again, didn’t ask me this, just came to that conclusion on her own. She also is utterly convinced that I dressed so nice because I wanted to “tempt” Matt, and I should have dressed more “modestly.” So I asked why this was all coming up now, and why not talk to me about it - I could have assured her that there was NEVER anything between Matt and I and never would be. This is where she tells me that DURING THEIR HONEYMOON he tells her that he’s having doubts, and feels like I was “the one that got away.” and needs to pray over their relationship. They haven’t separated or anything, but things have been tense and bad so when they had that dinner and she saw me again she was pissed - she didn’t say this directly but I think it’s pretty easy to infer. Now this didn’t come up in the call, but chronologically this happened shortly after I left the dinner - some of our friends texted her and then reached out to me, some talked to her directly. To the first person she talked to directly she started sl*t-shaming me pretty hard, but apparently in a way where she thought they’d agree with her, and when she didn’t she got pissed and has been really short with everyone after. At this point I tried to assure Susan that really nothing is there, I honestly have no clue what Matt’s on about and she just LOSES it. Starts screaming and swearing at me through the phone and crying and calling me really horrible things. I try to shut this down, but she cannot hear me she’s shouting so much. So I just hang up because wtf am I supposed to do with that. I send her a text saying that “Hey, I’m sorry you’re going through this, you don’t deserve to be treated this way, but I don’t deserve this treatment either. Whenever you are able to I’d like to have a respectful face to face conversation.” It shows read, but no answer. I have not contacted Matt, because honestly I’m a little freaked out and a lot pissed and don’t have a clue what to say and don’t really want to be near him atm. I don’t think this is over. I might update again when/if more happens because this was honestly really cathartic to write this all out. OOP's Comments: Commenter: They should just annul the wedding and go their separate ways OOP: Unfortunately they’ve passed the timeline where they could by a small margin. So they’d have to separate for a year, and then get divorced. And I don’t know if they would given that they’re quite religious, and while their denomination doesn’t disallow divorce it’s understandably quite against it. Especially if he wants to be a pastor. That said, I 100% agree. Commenter: NTA. When she's ready, definitely have that face to face conversation and explain that you were 15 when he asked you out! You were never the "one who got away" because you never dated and you were both teens! Also, please explain that you asked about the colors to ensure you wouldn't be matching the bridal party....which is a common question us women ask about weddings. Resssure her that you were only friends at a later date (after the teenage years) due to the friend groups overlapping, not because you sought him out, or he you. Explain, if given the chance, everything you've explained here and in your prior post. I definitely agree that you need to stay no contact with him, at least until they've figured everything out. You are definitely not the cause of their issues. It almost sounds like to me (with the info given) that he was settling, rather than finding that spark....especially given what he said to her on their honeymoon.....just, eww! Who says that to their new spouse?!?! If and when you have a face to face with her, tell her that you've chosen to go NC with him, or at the very least LC with him....but only if it's in a group setting and she's there. He sounds like he has some issues to work through.....we all do at times and that's ok. But what isn't ok is him comparing his new bride to other women. Again, this isn't your fault! You did nothing wrong. Please keep us updated OOP: Thanks for writing out this really thoughtful reply! Yeah, this is just. A wholeass mess. It’s left me feeling really gross, sad, creeped out and sad for Susan. I’m trying to figure out how long I should wait before reaching out to Susan again, let alone if really… like what the fuck can I do about this? Explanations are good but it doesn’t fix the core issue at hand. Ugh. Sorry, I hope this makes sense. This whole situation has just got me exhausted. submitted by /u/LucyAriaRose to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/EffectiveRepair8231 Originally posted to r/AmIOverreacting Previous BoRU #1 + BoRU #2 [New Update]: AIO: I feel like a Dad a the daycare I work at is hitting on me (20f) NEW UPDATE MARKED WITH ---- Trigger Warning: sexual assault, stalking, sexual harassment, mentions of CSA, hostile workplace RECAP Original Post: May 20, 2024 Hi! I work at a daycare, and I’ve noticed that one of the children's parents always makes inappropriate comments to me. At first, I thought he was just one of those people who always compliment others or that he just wanted to have a friendly relationship with his kids' educators, but now I think it’s more than that. During my first weeks there, I was always assigned to his younger daughter’s group (the babies), so I would see him often. At first, it was brief friendly talk, but it really escalated when I started working with the older kids (4-year-olds). His other daughter, let’s call her Emmy, and I clicked right away when we found out we’re birthday twins. She always wants me to play with her and asks for hugs literally every two minutes. Whenever her dad comes to pick up his kids, she always makes sure to give me a big hug and tells her dad that we’re best friends. Last month, Emmy’s dad and I ran into each other at the grocery store and started small talk. We were mostly talking about Emmy, and he just kept saying how much she loves me and that she wants me to come over to their house. I said something like, “Oh, she’s so cute. I love spending time with her too,” and tried to end the conversation, but he just kept talking. I noticed him looking at my chest a couple of times, which was one of the reasons I wanted to leave. He then offered me a ride, and although I initially declined, he kept pushing it, so I accepted. I didn’t let him see my house; I told him to drop me off downtown. Since then, I keep running into him, but to the point where I don’t think it’s a coincidence. He doesn’t live in the same neighborhood as me (I live near downtown). In fact, when he dropped me off the first time, he kept going on and on about how he could never live somewhere as far away as I do. So why do I keep seeing him? In our conversations, he always makes sure to compliment my physical appearance or mention my age and how “young and smart” I am. It obviously makes me uncomfortable, but for the sake of his daughters, especially Emmy, I don’t really say anything. I have tried to set some boundaries, but it’s really uncomfortable. I jokingly said once, “Well, if I were your age, I don’t think I’d date someone as young as me,” and he was like, “Well, good thing I would,” and he laughed. I casually mentioned this in a conversation with one of my colleagues, and she said something like, “Oh, he’s a flirt; that’s what he does.” She kept talking about how handsome he is (he is handsome but also a married dad of two). I asked if there’s anything we, as educators, could do if, hypothetically, a parent is being too friendly/flirty with us, and she basically said no. Anyway, it’s gotten hot outside, so I’ve started wearing sundresses, shorts, and crop tops, and he always compliments my outfits when he sees me and says he likes seeing my bellybutton piercing out (EW). Also, Emmy has told me that her dad said I’ll be their nanny for the weekends when the daycare is closed. I don’t know if he actually said that because she’s 4, but I don’t even want to ask because I don’t want to give him ideas if he didn’t actually say it. He has tried multiple times to give me his phone number to “call him if there’s anything,” and I always gently reminded him that we can communicate through the daycare app. He always says that he would rather call me directly than through the app. He was being super pushy, and I felt a little trapped, so I gave him my phone number. He texts me all the time, asking what I’m doing, etc. I have FaceTimed his daughters a couple of times, but it just feels wrong. I briefly talked about this to a friend, and she said that she would’ve told his wife. I don’t even think I have the guts to do that. Ever since my friend told me that, I started casually bringing up his wife in conversations. He would always change the subject or say she’s not here. Anyway, all this is to ask: what should I do? Am I imagining things? I feel trapped. I can’t lose my job; I’m scared that it’ll take me forever to find another one. Also, all the kids love me, and I love them. I’ve really gotten attached to them. I love Emmy too, and I mostly feel bad for her. What would you do in this situation? I’ve asked, and you can’t ban a family from attending a daycare, so that option is out of the window. Also, we can’t be on our phones 24/7, so it’s extremely hard to get “evidence.” Anything helps. Thank you! I don’t know i’m I’m posting this on the right subs, if not sorry about that Edit: I’ve never seen his wife, he’s the one who does everything. Emmy has mentioned her a few times (saying things like “Mommy got me this shirt” or something) but I don’t even know what she looks like. He doesn’t talk about her unless I bring her up. Edit 2: About the crop tops, we are allowed to wear them at work with long pants. Same thing with shorts, we can wear them with a non-cropped shirt. 90% of his comments about my piercing were outside of work, when I would run into him. Also, I blocked him. I don’t know if he noticed, but he’s blocked. Edit 3: A lot of people are asking me why/what I am scared of. I don’t have an exact answer. I’ve had a lot of traumatizing experiences with men so I don’t feel comfortable around any man in general. I don’t have any guy friends. It’s like I think of all the things they could do to me if they wanted to, then I get scared/uncomfortable. I know I have a fawn trauma response and I am working on it, I really am. Also, I have work on Friday (or Wednesday maybe) and I will talk to my supervisors and update. Relevant Comments Commenter: “That wouldn’t be appropriate” seems like a good response to 90% of his requests. I would get used to being comfortable saying that to pushy male customers. OOP: i say that sometimes and he’s like “oh well you’re best friends with emmy so we’re basically family” and i get scared so i just laugh it off or i try to end the conversations OOP responds to multiple redditors on not accepting any more things from the father and speak with her supervisor about her concerns OOP: i do say those things and he says that we’re like family because i’m “friends” with his daughter. i don’t always answer and he’ll sometimes bring it up when he drops off/picks up his kids and i say things oh i was busy or i didn’t see it. i keep telling myself that this time ill be direct and just say no but i just get so scared. it’s not like im full on flirting with him, i do reject him but not as firmly as i should i guess. whenever he brings up dating i say things like im not looking for a bf. and for the facetime thing, one time he was being really insistent and i said no and the text time i saw them at work, emmy asked me why i didn’t pick up the call and he said in front of her that i was being mean that day and that i didn’t wanna talk to her. she ended up crying. i tried telling my supervisor and she said that she never noticed any weird behaviour from him and he’s a very friendly man. she asked me if i had any proof which i didn’t. idk what else to do ~ i tried to talk to one of my supervisors about it but rn they’re always busy (they’re the new owners of the daycare so they’re trying to figure everything out) so it’s never a good time. i am alone with my group. i see him in the morning when he’s dropping off emmy and in the afternoon outside when he’s picking his kids up. our conversation in the morning are more brief bc all the parents are coming at the same time so there’s not much time. in the afternoon, he always tells emmy to keep playing with her friends just to buy more time and when i tell him i have to go back to watching everyone he says that there are plenty of other educators who are watching them and not to worry about it. i try to say things like hey i really have to go back to work/now’s not a right time but it’s like there’s nothing i can say to get through to him. im the one in charge of emmy i have to be the one to talk to him about emmy’s day etc   Update #1: May 23, 2024 Hello everyone, I want to thank everyone who gave me advice. I tried to read every comment. Before I give you an update, I need to clarify a few things: I don’t work at a school; it's a private, family-owned (i think) daycare. I have three managers—two women and one man. They became the new owners in January. I primarily interact with one of the female managers. I've tried to discuss this situation with her, but it’s never the right time. For example, I’d knock on her office door and say I needed to talk about Emmy’s dad. She’d say she’s busy and ask me to come back later. When I did, she’d apologize and ask to talk the next day. She also suggested texting, but I didn't feel comfortable telling her everything through text. Some suggested having another teacher watch my group when he arrives, but that’s not possible. In the afternoon, after nap time, we take the kids outside until their parents pick them up. All educators need to stay outside to supervise. When parents arrive, I discuss their child's day and hand over their keychain. It’s difficult because he always approaches me when I’m distracted, so I can’t warn a coworker. Rides: The first time I saw him outside of work was at the grocery store. He recognized me, we chatted briefly, and he offered me a ride. I declined, but he insisted, saying it was ungentlemanly to let me carry groceries alone. He paid for my groceries and drove me home, despite my discomfort. I sat in the backseat, but still. I shouldn’t have said yes. I was just so weirded out by the entire situation. The second time was at a gas station. After hanging out with a friend in his neighborhood, I stopped there for a drink. He saw me and again offered a ride. He was pushy, so I reluctantly agreed. That was the last time I accepted a ride from him. Clothing: Most of his comments about my piercing happened outside of work. I don’t wear revealing clothes to work; I mostly wear sweats. Occasionally, I wear a long sleeve crop top with sweatpants, which my managers don’t mind. We’re allowed to wear mom shorts. But again, I most of the time I wear sweats. Facetime: I’ve Facetimed his daughters three times, and each call lasted less than five minutes. I realize now that this was inappropriate, but yes it happened. Texting: I don’t always respond to his texts. If he texts ten times, I might reply three times. The thing is, he often asks in person why I don’t respond, telling me he had something important to say. He’d sometimes say that in front of Emmy, then say, “You see that Emmy, she’s not nice to Daddy. She doesn’t want to talk to me.” I live in Canada. Some suggested carrying pepper spray for protection, but it’s illegal here, so that’s not an option. I don’t know his exact age, but I’d guess late 30s to mid-40s. I’ve never seen his wife; some suggested they might be separated. Maybe. Emmy has mentioned her mom before, but she seems closer to her dad. The dating comment: I had ZERO idea my comment could be seen as flirting. I thought I was indirectly turning him down. When the topic of dating came up, I said I didn’t want a relationship. He joked that we’d get along great, and I responded by saying “Don’t you think you’re a little too old for me?” And he said, jokingly, “Oh, man. Dont say that. You’re very mature.” That’s when I said that I wouldn’t date someone my age if I were his age. Update: I was only scheduled on Friday this week but ended up working today too. I texted my manager saying that I have something very important to tell her about a parent and that I'm afraid my safety could be compromised. She asked me to come to her office before work to talk about it. I was very scared because reading the comments made me realize that I could lose my job because I gave him my number. But I still told her everything (looking back, I missed a few things, but I told her the most important things). I told her about how, in the beginning (when I was assigned to his 2-year-old daughter's group), he was very friendly and nice to me, but it escalated when I started caring for Emmy. I told her about the grocery incident, the gas station incident, and seeing him near my neighborhood. She kind of "defended" him by saying that I live near downtown, so it’s not a miracle to run into someone there. I then brought up the fact that, yes, I understand that, but he’s told me that he enjoys staying in his neighborhood and that I live so far away, and he doesn’t understand how I'm able to work at a job so far away, so it was weird to see him so much. I think it made her understand more. I told her about the comments about my appearance. I asked her if it was possible to get assigned to another group, and she said yes. I told her about me giving him my number after feeling pressured, and she said that I shouldn’t have done that, that it’s very dangerous to give out personal information like that. She also said that, especially with my job, all communication must be through the app. She said that she was a little more upset at the dad because he’s been attending that daycare for almost four years, and he knows that parents are not allowed to do that. I then told her about how he makes Emmy play with her friends when it’s time to go just to talk to me longer. She said that since I won’t be assigned to Emmy’s group, I won’t even have to talk to him at all. She said that she’ll take care of it and let the other girls know to keep an eye on him. I told her about the Facetimes and how he told Emmy that I was mean for not answering one time and how he made her cry. She only said that that was out of line. I asked if it was possible to “ban” him from attending, and she said maybe. She doesn’t have any solid proof (I showed her some text messages, but she said that he was being friendly in the messages and that there was nothing sexual). She said that most of this was basically hearsay, and she doesn’t have concrete proof of him being an actual predator. As for Emmy, we played together on the playground as usual. I think the hardest part for me is to slowly distance myself from her. I did, however, encourage her to play with her friends, but she would always come back every five minutes to ask to play with me. When her dad arrived, he greeted me and asked me about Emmy’s day and her keychain. I said that I did not take care of her today and pointed to the girl that did. I then got up to get Emmy to tell her to leave. He tried to stop me, but I just kept walking. I didn’t really give him time to talk to me. When I got Emmy, I gave her a hug, then stayed on the other side of the playground, and they left. I know it’s not much, but at least I avoided an interaction with him today. I think that’s it. I tried to answer everything. Edit: He’s never driven me home, I would always ask to drop me off downtown. Typo sorry! Comments Commenter: If he texts you, tell him that you got a memo from work that says all interaction with parents must go through the app with no exceptions for legal and safety reasons and that you can't risk your job. Then block him. Or just block him.   Update #2: May 24, 2024 Hi, I saw some comments asking for an update, so I wanted to share what happened because I am too ashamed to tell someone in real life. I had work from yesterday 8 AM to 5 PM, then went straight to the gym to work out with a friend. I got there around 6 PM and worked out until about 8:30 PM. I was walking home (I live about 10 minutes away from my gym) when I heard someone behind me. Looking back, I know I shouldn’t have walked home, but I didn’t think about it in the moment. I had music in my ears, so I didn’t know if someone was talking to me or on the phone, so I just kept walking. I felt the person getting closer and immediately thought, “Oh my God, what if it’s him?” I started walking a little faster. After about 2 minutes, the person tapped me on the shoulder. When I turned around, it was him. My heart dropped. I immediately froze. I had practiced what to say if I ever got into this situation, but of course I had to forget everything. He acted like we ran into each other and said, “Hey, it’s nice seeing you.” I said, “Hi, nice seeing you, but I have to go.” He complimented my hair (I recently dyed it) and said it looked good on me. I said a quick thank you and tried to leave. He then grabbed my wrist and said, “I don’t like when you act like that.” I just froze up; I couldn’t move. He asked why I don’t take care of Emmy anymore. He said that she constantly asks about me at home and that I make her cry. I stuttered and said I didn’t know, that I’m not the one who decides. I said I have to go now, sorry. He then asked if I blocked him. I said I really can’t talk right now. He then blurted out that he saw me working out. He was doing all of this while grabbing my wrist, mind you. I didn’t know what to say, so I repeated that I had to go. He started looking at me up and down in a disgusting way. He was staring at my boobs while smiling. He then started caressing my arms. One arm stopped at my waist, and the other one kept caressing my arm. He would sometimes move it to my chest and touch me there. I don’t know why I didn’t just punch him in the face. I just could. not. move. Before you ask, I wasn’t wearing anything revealing. I had on a hoodie and sweatpants. I even removed my belly piercing because I don’t like this type of attention. I eventually quietly said, “Can you please stop?” He looked at me, smiled, and then left. I’ve been getting sexually assaulted by men since the age of 7. I promised myself after getting sexually assaulted at 18 by a friend that I would never let it happen again. Now this. I don’t know why this keeps happening. Most of the time, I feel like my body isn’t even mine, just for someone else to use whenever they feel like it, no matter if I want it or not. Maybe it was my fault because I shouldn’t have walked home knowing I had a “stalker”. Maybe it’s my fault because I didn’t tell him to leave me alone earlier. Maybe it’s my fault because I am 20 years old and I can’t fucking say no. I know he didn’t full-on grab my tits and squeeze them, but I feel so so violated. I am too ashamed to reveal this to anyone. I told my boss I was sick to avoid going to work for a couple of days. I went to the police station, but they said there wasn’t anything they could do legally because he didn’t commit actual crimes and that I didn’t really have any proof. I just feel like they didn’t take me seriously. They gave me tips to be more careful like don’t walk late at night, change your number, don’t have the same routine, etc., but that’s it. They won’t give me a restraining order. I’ll be honest, I didn’t understand half of the terminology they were using. But from what I understood, we’re both adults so the texting and Facetimes aren’t incriminating enough. I guess I’ll just stay home. I feel so dirty. I thought I had everything under control because I found a way to avoid him at work, but I guess I was wrong. I genuinely thought that I found a way to make everything stop. The worst part is I saw some comments saying that this whole situation could escalate if he finds out that I’m avoiding him and I didn’t believe them. Again, I was wrong. I don’t know if I’m looking for advice or sympathy, but I don’t have anyone in my life who could help. Maybe some friends, but I am just so ashamed and embarrassed to say that a man was “groping” me and I basically let it happen because I was scared. It’s just humiliating. As for my family, knowing my mom, she would most likely slut-shame me and say it’s my fault. But yeah, here’s the update I guess. I don’t know if I’ll update after this, mainly because I don’t know what else to do. Edit: (copying and pasting this from one of my replies because I can see how it looks): i posted about him 4 days ago but i started having doubts about him stalking be like a month ago i think. i talked to my manager wednesday and i got assigned to another group. i didn’t interact with him wednesday and yesterday. HE is the one saying that his daughter is crying about not seeing me. i know it’s not true, he keeps saying stuff like this. saying things about his daughter to make me feel bad because he knows we’re close. when this incident happened, i went straight to the police station near my home to tell them what happened (bc it’s opened day and night). i asked if with what i have i can have a restraining order and they said no. i know im updating quick but i genuinely don’t have anyone i can talk to about this Edit 2: Okay I think I’ll just quit my job stay with a friend for now. I’ll send an email explaining my situation with my boss and try to find a stay at home job. Thank you all   Update #3: June 18, 2024 Hello! A few weeks ago, I made a post about a man stalking me at the daycare where I work. (I don’t know how to link it, if I knew I would!) I told my boss I was sick for four days in a row to avoid going to work. When I tried to call in sick again, she said she would have to fire me if I continued to skip work. I decided to quit because I was too scared to return and even more scared to reveal the real reason for quitting. When this happened, I moved in with my friend. I initially told her I had a fight with my mom and needed a place to stay. Later, I explained the real reason, and she helped me write an email to my boss explaining everything. I filed a police report, but nothing happened. My boss contacted me two days later to discuss the situation. We had a Zoom meeting with all three of my bosses, and we talked about everything. She apologized for not taking me seriously and promised to do better. I asked if the man could be banned, but they said it was harder than I thought and would be hard on the kids. The best they could do was wait until August/September when his oldest daughter would start school, and they would ask him to enroll his youngest in another daycare. My boss asked if I could eventually return to work, and I agreed on the condition that I wouldn't have to go outside or take care of his daughters. They agreed, and I returned to work the next day. I also found his wife's email address on the daycare app and told her everything. I was scared it could backfire, but I felt she needed to know. She thanked me, explained that they were separated and in the process of getting a divorce, and said this wasn't the first time he had targeted a caretaker. She said she doesn’t speak to him unless she absolutely has to, and the reason he does the pick up/drop offs is because she lives too far away. She advised me to avoid him and warned that he could be charming and friendly but was dangerous. She said he had a thing for young girls and not to fall into his trap like she did. She gave me her number to call if I needed anything. My first few days back at work were fine. I would stay in the kitchen in the mornings to avoid him and would clock out before the parents arrived. However, I ran into him once when he picked up his youngest early. We were both surprised, and he tried to talk to me, but I quickly said hi and left. After that incident, I started receiving no caller ID calls again, which had stopped when I moved in with my friend. I went to the police to document everything and showed them the email from his ex-wife. They advised me to change my number, which I did, but they haven't contacted me since. He found my Instagram and sent me a request. My account is private, so I deleted the request, but he sent another one. My Instagram username is my first and last name, and I have an uncommon last name, so I'm worried about what he could find next. I changed my username, but he already saw it. My email address also is my first and last name. I'm considering quitting again and am wondering if I'm exaggerating because he hasn't done anything yet. However, he knows my job, full name, Instagram, old phone number, and possibly my address and email. Should I tell his wife or meet up with her? I feel that if I tell my boss, they will just tell me to wait until September, and the police aren't doing anything. I partly blame myself for going back to the job where my problems started, but I love it and it pays well. I think moving to another city would be the best scenario, but I can't afford it right now, hence why I went back to work in the first place. I always carry a rape alarm on me now, feeling that he could appear anytime, and it's so unfair. Please, I need advice. Thank you! Edit: I’m from Ontario Canada!! Relevant Comments Magdovus: Don't delete your socials. That's evidence. Just ignore it, so it's there to show the police. Evidence is key to the police being able to do something - remember that they have to have evidence in order to take action. How did you leave things with his wife? If she asked to be kept up to date then do so, otherwise I'd just check in with her every could weeks. You're doing well dealing with this. I'm glad you got the alarm. Stay strong, and document everything! OOP: she told me i could call her anytime and give me info about him whenever. i just don’t feel comfortable telling her all of this when she doesn’t want anything to do with him so i feel a little stuck. & thank you so much! Quiet_Water0128: This is really scary, OP. This man isn't backing down, he's ramping up his stalking by sending IG requests after you blocked him on IG already. His wife can't fix this. TELL YOUR BOSS and please report his repeated efforts to your local police department. This is stalking. And stop saying, "Hi" to him. At all. No words. You shouldn't have to leave a job to avoid a stalker. OOP: my boss said it would be too stressful on the kids for them to change daycares right now and leave all their friends behind so “for the sake of the kids” we have to wait till september. & yes i know!! i wanna stop saying hi to him but it’s like an automated thing. like as soon as i see a parent or a kid at work i automatically say hi. i didn’t even register it was him at first Status-Biscotti: Have you specifically told him to stop? At this point it seems like you have enough support around you to do so., and you’re not going to get in trouble since they know what’s going on. Can you get your boss to intervene and ask him to stop contacting you? OOP: yes and i have told him i’m not interested. i told my boss but she says to not respond to him   Update #4: June 26, 2024 Hi everyone, just a quick update: I am alive and well. I don’t know why it’s not letting me respond to DMs—maybe it’s me hahaha I barely know how to work the app. I basically live with my friend now. I still go to work but am trying to find a new job. I’m keeping this one until I find another. The only thing is, I don’t know where to apply. I can’t live with my friend forever—she’s trying to find a roommate for July 1st, and I can’t officially move out yet. I feel like if I apply for a job near my house, it would be too easy for him to find me. If I apply far from home, I feel like it would be easier for him to attack me on my way back every day. I’ve been trying to pick up the habit of recording every time I leave my classroom or go outside to gather evidence. I forget sometimes, but I really try. I stopped going to the gym because he knows where it is. He also found my new number—I have no idea how. He keeps calling me, so I always have my phone on do not disturb now. On June 18th, he called me 19 times from different numbers with a 647 area code (it used to be 249). I don’t have concrete proof it’s him, but I can feel it. I changed my email address, deactivated my Instagram, and made a new one with about 15 close friends. I showed the phone calls to the police, and they told me to send the evidence to an email address they gave me. However, since the numbers keep changing, it’s not considered good evidence. They told me to keep trying to find more evidence (isn’t that their job???) and to change my number AGAIN. I also emailed his ex-wife, telling her that he found my Instagram and new number. She replied with a lengthy email, basically advising me not to respond to him because he’s dangerous. She gave me examples of how he used to treat her and her kids. She said he buys their love with toys and that she caught him masturbating to their previous nanny’s pictures. She suggested deleting any photos of me on social media because he might be doing the same with mine. She’s been wanting a divorce for a long time, but he keeps dragging it out. He tells everyone he’s happily married and still wears his ring. She’s terrified for her kids because he always feeds them lies. I deleted my Facebook too. I showed my boss the calls, but she didn’t seem to care and doubted my concerns. She was like, “Do you REALLY think he’s like that? I’ve known him for years, I promise he’s so nice.” I’m actually considering suing them because I think she finds me stupid. I had a panic attack yesterday because I can’t fucking walk without thinking every man behind me is him. I don’t know how to sue someone, let alone a workplace, but I’ll do my research. I bought wasp spray, but I don’t carry it because knowing myself, I will just freeze up and what is he ends up using it on me? Ultimately, I think I’m going to move. I’m considering moving to Montreal—I have a friend there, and I just want to get away from everything. Sorry for posting about the same situation for a month straight, but I don’t want to bother my roommate all the time, and I don’t want to scare her into making me move out. It’s such a weird situation, and it’s hard to explain to people, like it’s not like I’m a celebrity with a crazy stalker fan. But yea little update, I guess I’ll change my number again. (Also my phone’s in french haha don’t mind that, jeudi means Thursday, vendredi means Friday and lundi means Monday). Thank you everyone for the support, I feel less alone.   ----NEW UPDATE---- FINAL UPDATE - AIO: I feel like a Dad at the daycare I work at is hitting on me (20f): July 3, 2024 Hi everyone! Okay, I think this is officially the final update about my stalker situation. On Canada Day, I randomly ran into a girl I went to elementary school with, and we chatted for a while. She told me she had moved to a new place, so I jumped at the chance to ask if she needed a roommate. She said it would be great because she desperately needs someone. I looked up the area and found that I could definitely find a job there. I’ll only tell a handful of people where I’m moving, but I am so happy I finally have a place. His ex-wife and I met up at a café, and I updated her on everything. I finally told her about how he touched me that one night after the gym because, up until that point, I hadn’t told anyone, not even the police. I also told her that he still wears his ring and says he’s married. I shared everything I could, and we comforted each other for a while. She said that one time she went through his work phone and saw videos of their previous nanny (who was 16/17 at the time) changing. Now I’m terrified he may have videos of me because I’m not sure he doesn’t know where I live, and I tend to change in front of my window sometimes without realizing it. It also kind of surprised me, but she said not to let him know that I know he’s getting a divorce. She advised me to act like I don’t know anything. As for my stalker, I haven’t seen him since the incident where we ran into each other near the nursery, but I keep getting calls. People have asked me what he says when I pick up, but he doesn’t say anything. He spams me, I answer, then he doesn’t say anything, so I hang up. As for my boss, I don’t know if there is an HR department where I work. When I got hired, I didn’t sign any paperwork, I just gave them my SSN and ID. I sent an email to my boss explaining that I am quitting because she’s enabling sexual harassment. To summarize, I said that she’s failing to protect her staff. I don’t want to sue them because I don’t want to get into this whole thing; I just want to leave. She apologized and asked to meet up, but I didn’t answer because I feel like she will gaslight me. I am getting my number changed and moving soon. I told his ex-wife she could use everything I told her for her divorce. I told her that she could tell my boss what I told her too, if she wanted. Hopefully, everything is over now so I can finally shut up about this lol. Thank you all!! Relevant Comments Altruistic_Appeal_25: Did anyone say how the former nanny got away from him? Did it go on until he fixated on someone else? OOP: the wife told the nanny behind her husbands back that they found someone else to babysit and not to come back   Editor's Note: OOP has reached out to me via messages. She has given me permission to share some details to clarify things up for everyone: OOP: I don’t even know if people are gonna see this edit, I was thinking of just ignoring it but I just wanna make a few things clear: I was born in Quebec then moved to Ontario when I was young. I grew up speaking French then moved to Ontario, where I learned English. There are a lot of things I still struggle with in English. I didn’t know “SSN” was an American thing. It’s called SIN in Ontario but also a lot of people I know use those terms interchangeably (especially in bilingual places like Montreal) so I thought you could use both. When I went to the police for the first time, I said that he grabbed me and tried to intimidate me. I didn’t have the courage to say that he touched my boobs but I said that he grabbed my wrist and wouldn’t let me go. I said that he kept touching my arm and tried to scare me. I should’ve told them everything I know, but I was just so embarrassed, and still am. I don’t want to talk about that at all, especially because I don’t want to hear a question like “what did you do when he did that” because I didn’t do anything, I just froze. It’s embarrassing to me. His ex-wife is the only one who knows the full story of what happened that night after the gym, I felt like I owed it to her, especially because she was so honest with me from the beginning. What I mean by “He spams me, I pick up, he doesn’t say anything so I hang up” is that the first times he called me on my new number, I did answer, but he wouldn’t say anything, so I would hang up. I understood very quickly that it was him who would call me, so I stopped answering a long time ago. I’m sorry I wasn’t 100% clear I hope it makes more sense now   DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7 THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP submitted by /u/Choice_Evidence1983 to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/EffectiveRepair8231 Originally posted to r/AmIOverreacting Previous BoRU #1 [New Update]: AIO: I feel like a Dad a the daycare I work at is hitting on me (20f) Trigger Warning: sexual assault, stalking, sexual harassment, mentions of CSA, hostile workplace RECAP Original Post: May 20, 2024 Hi! I work at a daycare, and I’ve noticed that one of the children's parents always makes inappropriate comments to me. At first, I thought he was just one of those people who always compliment others or that he just wanted to have a friendly relationship with his kids' educators, but now I think it’s more than that. During my first weeks there, I was always assigned to his younger daughter’s group (the babies), so I would see him often. At first, it was brief friendly talk, but it really escalated when I started working with the older kids (4-year-olds). His other daughter, let’s call her Emmy, and I clicked right away when we found out we’re birthday twins. She always wants me to play with her and asks for hugs literally every two minutes. Whenever her dad comes to pick up his kids, she always makes sure to give me a big hug and tells her dad that we’re best friends. Last month, Emmy’s dad and I ran into each other at the grocery store and started small talk. We were mostly talking about Emmy, and he just kept saying how much she loves me and that she wants me to come over to their house. I said something like, “Oh, she’s so cute. I love spending time with her too,” and tried to end the conversation, but he just kept talking. I noticed him looking at my chest a couple of times, which was one of the reasons I wanted to leave. He then offered me a ride, and although I initially declined, he kept pushing it, so I accepted. I didn’t let him see my house; I told him to drop me off downtown. Since then, I keep running into him, but to the point where I don’t think it’s a coincidence. He doesn’t live in the same neighborhood as me (I live near downtown). In fact, when he dropped me off the first time, he kept going on and on about how he could never live somewhere as far away as I do. So why do I keep seeing him? In our conversations, he always makes sure to compliment my physical appearance or mention my age and how “young and smart” I am. It obviously makes me uncomfortable, but for the sake of his daughters, especially Emmy, I don’t really say anything. I have tried to set some boundaries, but it’s really uncomfortable. I jokingly said once, “Well, if I were your age, I don’t think I’d date someone as young as me,” and he was like, “Well, good thing I would,” and he laughed. I casually mentioned this in a conversation with one of my colleagues, and she said something like, “Oh, he’s a flirt; that’s what he does.” She kept talking about how handsome he is (he is handsome but also a married dad of two). I asked if there’s anything we, as educators, could do if, hypothetically, a parent is being too friendly/flirty with us, and she basically said no. Anyway, it’s gotten hot outside, so I’ve started wearing sundresses, shorts, and crop tops, and he always compliments my outfits when he sees me and says he likes seeing my bellybutton piercing out (EW). Also, Emmy has told me that her dad said I’ll be their nanny for the weekends when the daycare is closed. I don’t know if he actually said that because she’s 4, but I don’t even want to ask because I don’t want to give him ideas if he didn’t actually say it. He has tried multiple times to give me his phone number to “call him if there’s anything,” and I always gently reminded him that we can communicate through the daycare app. He always says that he would rather call me directly than through the app. He was being super pushy, and I felt a little trapped, so I gave him my phone number. He texts me all the time, asking what I’m doing, etc. I have FaceTimed his daughters a couple of times, but it just feels wrong. I briefly talked about this to a friend, and she said that she would’ve told his wife. I don’t even think I have the guts to do that. Ever since my friend told me that, I started casually bringing up his wife in conversations. He would always change the subject or say she’s not here. Anyway, all this is to ask: what should I do? Am I imagining things? I feel trapped. I can’t lose my job; I’m scared that it’ll take me forever to find another one. Also, all the kids love me, and I love them. I’ve really gotten attached to them. I love Emmy too, and I mostly feel bad for her. What would you do in this situation? I’ve asked, and you can’t ban a family from attending a daycare, so that option is out of the window. Also, we can’t be on our phones 24/7, so it’s extremely hard to get “evidence.” Anything helps. Thank you! I don’t know i’m I’m posting this on the right subs, if not sorry about that Edit: I’ve never seen his wife, he’s the one who does everything. Emmy has mentioned her a few times (saying things like “Mommy got me this shirt” or something) but I don’t even know what she looks like. He doesn’t talk about her unless I bring her up. Edit 2: About the crop tops, we are allowed to wear them at work with long pants. Same thing with shorts, we can wear them with a non-cropped shirt. 90% of his comments about my piercing were outside of work, when I would run into him. Also, I blocked him. I don’t know if he noticed, but he’s blocked. Edit 3: A lot of people are asking me why/what I am scared of. I don’t have an exact answer. I’ve had a lot of traumatizing experiences with men so I don’t feel comfortable around any man in general. I don’t have any guy friends. It’s like I think of all the things they could do to me if they wanted to, then I get scared/uncomfortable. I know I have a fawn trauma response and I am working on it, I really am. Also, I have work on Friday (or Wednesday maybe) and I will talk to my supervisors and update. Relevant Comments Commenter: “That wouldn’t be appropriate” seems like a good response to 90% of his requests. I would get used to being comfortable saying that to pushy male customers. OOP: i say that sometimes and he’s like “oh well you’re best friends with emmy so we’re basically family” and i get scared so i just laugh it off or i try to end the conversations OOP responds to multiple redditors on not accepting any more things from the father and speak with her supervisor about her concerns OOP: i do say those things and he says that we’re like family because i’m “friends” with his daughter. i don’t always answer and he’ll sometimes bring it up when he drops off/picks up his kids and i say things oh i was busy or i didn’t see it. i keep telling myself that this time ill be direct and just say no but i just get so scared. it’s not like im full on flirting with him, i do reject him but not as firmly as i should i guess. whenever he brings up dating i say things like im not looking for a bf. and for the facetime thing, one time he was being really insistent and i said no and the text time i saw them at work, emmy asked me why i didn’t pick up the call and he said in front of her that i was being mean that day and that i didn’t wanna talk to her. she ended up crying. i tried telling my supervisor and she said that she never noticed any weird behaviour from him and he’s a very friendly man. she asked me if i had any proof which i didn’t. idk what else to do ~ i tried to talk to one of my supervisors about it but rn they’re always busy (they’re the new owners of the daycare so they’re trying to figure everything out) so it’s never a good time. i am alone with my group. i see him in the morning when he’s dropping off emmy and in the afternoon outside when he’s picking his kids up. our conversation in the morning are more brief bc all the parents are coming at the same time so there’s not much time. in the afternoon, he always tells emmy to keep playing with her friends just to buy more time and when i tell him i have to go back to watching everyone he says that there are plenty of other educators who are watching them and not to worry about it. i try to say things like hey i really have to go back to work/now’s not a right time but it’s like there’s nothing i can say to get through to him. im the one in charge of emmy i have to be the one to talk to him about emmy’s day etc   Update #1: May 23, 2024 Hello everyone, I want to thank everyone who gave me advice. I tried to read every comment. Before I give you an update, I need to clarify a few things: I don’t work at a school; it's a private, family-owned (i think) daycare. I have three managers—two women and one man. They became the new owners in January. I primarily interact with one of the female managers. I've tried to discuss this situation with her, but it’s never the right time. For example, I’d knock on her office door and say I needed to talk about Emmy’s dad. She’d say she’s busy and ask me to come back later. When I did, she’d apologize and ask to talk the next day. She also suggested texting, but I didn't feel comfortable telling her everything through text. Some suggested having another teacher watch my group when he arrives, but that’s not possible. In the afternoon, after nap time, we take the kids outside until their parents pick them up. All educators need to stay outside to supervise. When parents arrive, I discuss their child's day and hand over their keychain. It’s difficult because he always approaches me when I’m distracted, so I can’t warn a coworker. Rides: The first time I saw him outside of work was at the grocery store. He recognized me, we chatted briefly, and he offered me a ride. I declined, but he insisted, saying it was ungentlemanly to let me carry groceries alone. He paid for my groceries and drove me home, despite my discomfort. I sat in the backseat, but still. I shouldn’t have said yes. I was just so weirded out by the entire situation. The second time was at a gas station. After hanging out with a friend in his neighborhood, I stopped there for a drink. He saw me and again offered a ride. He was pushy, so I reluctantly agreed. That was the last time I accepted a ride from him. Clothing: Most of his comments about my piercing happened outside of work. I don’t wear revealing clothes to work; I mostly wear sweats. Occasionally, I wear a long sleeve crop top with sweatpants, which my managers don’t mind. We’re allowed to wear mom shorts. But again, I most of the time I wear sweats. Facetime: I’ve Facetimed his daughters three times, and each call lasted less than five minutes. I realize now that this was inappropriate, but yes it happened. Texting: I don’t always respond to his texts. If he texts ten times, I might reply three times. The thing is, he often asks in person why I don’t respond, telling me he had something important to say. He’d sometimes say that in front of Emmy, then say, “You see that Emmy, she’s not nice to Daddy. She doesn’t want to talk to me.” I live in Canada. Some suggested carrying pepper spray for protection, but it’s illegal here, so that’s not an option. I don’t know his exact age, but I’d guess late 30s to mid-40s. I’ve never seen his wife; some suggested they might be separated. Maybe. Emmy has mentioned her mom before, but she seems closer to her dad. The dating comment: I had ZERO idea my comment could be seen as flirting. I thought I was indirectly turning him down. When the topic of dating came up, I said I didn’t want a relationship. He joked that we’d get along great, and I responded by saying “Don’t you think you’re a little too old for me?” And he said, jokingly, “Oh, man. Dont say that. You’re very mature.” That’s when I said that I wouldn’t date someone my age if I were his age. Update: I was only scheduled on Friday this week but ended up working today too. I texted my manager saying that I have something very important to tell her about a parent and that I'm afraid my safety could be compromised. She asked me to come to her office before work to talk about it. I was very scared because reading the comments made me realize that I could lose my job because I gave him my number. But I still told her everything (looking back, I missed a few things, but I told her the most important things). I told her about how, in the beginning (when I was assigned to his 2-year-old daughter's group), he was very friendly and nice to me, but it escalated when I started caring for Emmy. I told her about the grocery incident, the gas station incident, and seeing him near my neighborhood. She kind of "defended" him by saying that I live near downtown, so it’s not a miracle to run into someone there. I then brought up the fact that, yes, I understand that, but he’s told me that he enjoys staying in his neighborhood and that I live so far away, and he doesn’t understand how I'm able to work at a job so far away, so it was weird to see him so much. I think it made her understand more. I told her about the comments about my appearance. I asked her if it was possible to get assigned to another group, and she said yes. I told her about me giving him my number after feeling pressured, and she said that I shouldn’t have done that, that it’s very dangerous to give out personal information like that. She also said that, especially with my job, all communication must be through the app. She said that she was a little more upset at the dad because he’s been attending that daycare for almost four years, and he knows that parents are not allowed to do that. I then told her about how he makes Emmy play with her friends when it’s time to go just to talk to me longer. She said that since I won’t be assigned to Emmy’s group, I won’t even have to talk to him at all. She said that she’ll take care of it and let the other girls know to keep an eye on him. I told her about the Facetimes and how he told Emmy that I was mean for not answering one time and how he made her cry. She only said that that was out of line. I asked if it was possible to “ban” him from attending, and she said maybe. She doesn’t have any solid proof (I showed her some text messages, but she said that he was being friendly in the messages and that there was nothing sexual). She said that most of this was basically hearsay, and she doesn’t have concrete proof of him being an actual predator. As for Emmy, we played together on the playground as usual. I think the hardest part for me is to slowly distance myself from her. I did, however, encourage her to play with her friends, but she would always come back every five minutes to ask to play with me. When her dad arrived, he greeted me and asked me about Emmy’s day and her keychain. I said that I did not take care of her today and pointed to the girl that did. I then got up to get Emmy to tell her to leave. He tried to stop me, but I just kept walking. I didn’t really give him time to talk to me. When I got Emmy, I gave her a hug, then stayed on the other side of the playground, and they left. I know it’s not much, but at least I avoided an interaction with him today. I think that’s it. I tried to answer everything. Edit: He’s never driven me home, I would always ask to drop me off downtown. Typo sorry! Comments Commenter: If he texts you, tell him that you got a memo from work that says all interaction with parents must go through the app with no exceptions for legal and safety reasons and that you can't risk your job. Then block him. Or just block him.   Update #2: May 24, 2024 Hi, I saw some comments asking for an update, so I wanted to share what happened because I am too ashamed to tell someone in real life. I had work from yesterday 8 AM to 5 PM, then went straight to the gym to work out with a friend. I got there around 6 PM and worked out until about 8:30 PM. I was walking home (I live about 10 minutes away from my gym) when I heard someone behind me. Looking back, I know I shouldn’t have walked home, but I didn’t think about it in the moment. I had music in my ears, so I didn’t know if someone was talking to me or on the phone, so I just kept walking. I felt the person getting closer and immediately thought, “Oh my God, what if it’s him?” I started walking a little faster. After about 2 minutes, the person tapped me on the shoulder. When I turned around, it was him. My heart dropped. I immediately froze. I had practiced what to say if I ever got into this situation, but of course I had to forget everything. He acted like we ran into each other and said, “Hey, it’s nice seeing you.” I said, “Hi, nice seeing you, but I have to go.” He complimented my hair (I recently dyed it) and said it looked good on me. I said a quick thank you and tried to leave. He then grabbed my wrist and said, “I don’t like when you act like that.” I just froze up; I couldn’t move. He asked why I don’t take care of Emmy anymore. He said that she constantly asks about me at home and that I make her cry. I stuttered and said I didn’t know, that I’m not the one who decides. I said I have to go now, sorry. He then asked if I blocked him. I said I really can’t talk right now. He then blurted out that he saw me working out. He was doing all of this while grabbing my wrist, mind you. I didn’t know what to say, so I repeated that I had to go. He started looking at me up and down in a disgusting way. He was staring at my boobs while smiling. He then started caressing my arms. One arm stopped at my waist, and the other one kept caressing my arm. He would sometimes move it to my chest and touch me there. I don’t know why I didn’t just punch him in the face. I just could. not. move. Before you ask, I wasn’t wearing anything revealing. I had on a hoodie and sweatpants. I even removed my belly piercing because I don’t like this type of attention. I eventually quietly said, “Can you please stop?” He looked at me, smiled, and then left. I’ve been getting sexually assaulted by men since the age of 7. I promised myself after getting sexually assaulted at 18 by a friend that I would never let it happen again. Now this. I don’t know why this keeps happening. Most of the time, I feel like my body isn’t even mine, just for someone else to use whenever they feel like it, no matter if I want it or not. Maybe it was my fault because I shouldn’t have walked home knowing I had a “stalker”. Maybe it’s my fault because I didn’t tell him to leave me alone earlier. Maybe it’s my fault because I am 20 years old and I can’t fucking say no. I know he didn’t full-on grab my tits and squeeze them, but I feel so so violated. I am too ashamed to reveal this to anyone. I told my boss I was sick to avoid going to work for a couple of days. I went to the police station, but they said there wasn’t anything they could do legally because he didn’t commit actual crimes and that I didn’t really have any proof. I just feel like they didn’t take me seriously. They gave me tips to be more careful like don’t walk late at night, change your number, don’t have the same routine, etc., but that’s it. They won’t give me a restraining order. I’ll be honest, I didn’t understand half of the terminology they were using. But from what I understood, we’re both adults so the texting and Facetimes aren’t incriminating enough. I guess I’ll just stay home. I feel so dirty. I thought I had everything under control because I found a way to avoid him at work, but I guess I was wrong. I genuinely thought that I found a way to make everything stop. The worst part is I saw some comments saying that this whole situation could escalate if he finds out that I’m avoiding him and I didn’t believe them. Again, I was wrong. I don’t know if I’m looking for advice or sympathy, but I don’t have anyone in my life who could help. Maybe some friends, but I am just so ashamed and embarrassed to say that a man was “groping” me and I basically let it happen because I was scared. It’s just humiliating. As for my family, knowing my mom, she would most likely slut-shame me and say it’s my fault. But yeah, here’s the update I guess. I don’t know if I’ll update after this, mainly because I don’t know what else to do. Edit: (copying and pasting this from one of my replies because I can see how it looks): i posted about him 4 days ago but i started having doubts about him stalking be like a month ago i think. i talked to my manager wednesday and i got assigned to another group. i didn’t interact with him wednesday and yesterday. HE is the one saying that his daughter is crying about not seeing me. i know it’s not true, he keeps saying stuff like this. saying things about his daughter to make me feel bad because he knows we’re close. when this incident happened, i went straight to the police station near my home to tell them what happened (bc it’s opened day and night). i asked if with what i have i can have a restraining order and they said no. i know im updating quick but i genuinely don’t have anyone i can talk to about this Edit 2: Okay I think I’ll just quit my job stay with a friend for now. I’ll send an email explaining my situation with my boss and try to find a stay at home job. Thank you all   ----NEW UPDATE---- Update #3: June 18, 2024 Hello! A few weeks ago, I made a post about a man stalking me at the daycare where I work. (I don’t know how to link it, if I knew I would!) I told my boss I was sick for four days in a row to avoid going to work. When I tried to call in sick again, she said she would have to fire me if I continued to skip work. I decided to quit because I was too scared to return and even more scared to reveal the real reason for quitting. When this happened, I moved in with my friend. I initially told her I had a fight with my mom and needed a place to stay. Later, I explained the real reason, and she helped me write an email to my boss explaining everything. I filed a police report, but nothing happened. My boss contacted me two days later to discuss the situation. We had a Zoom meeting with all three of my bosses, and we talked about everything. She apologized for not taking me seriously and promised to do better. I asked if the man could be banned, but they said it was harder than I thought and would be hard on the kids. The best they could do was wait until August/September when his oldest daughter would start school, and they would ask him to enroll his youngest in another daycare. My boss asked if I could eventually return to work, and I agreed on the condition that I wouldn't have to go outside or take care of his daughters. They agreed, and I returned to work the next day. I also found his wife's email address on the daycare app and told her everything. I was scared it could backfire, but I felt she needed to know. She thanked me, explained that they were separated and in the process of getting a divorce, and said this wasn't the first time he had targeted a caretaker. She said she doesn’t speak to him unless she absolutely has to, and the reason he does the pick up/drop offs is because she lives too far away. She advised me to avoid him and warned that he could be charming and friendly but was dangerous. She said he had a thing for young girls and not to fall into his trap like she did. She gave me her number to call if I needed anything. My first few days back at work were fine. I would stay in the kitchen in the mornings to avoid him and would clock out before the parents arrived. However, I ran into him once when he picked up his youngest early. We were both surprised, and he tried to talk to me, but I quickly said hi and left. After that incident, I started receiving no caller ID calls again, which had stopped when I moved in with my friend. I went to the police to document everything and showed them the email from his ex-wife. They advised me to change my number, which I did, but they haven't contacted me since. He found my Instagram and sent me a request. My account is private, so I deleted the request, but he sent another one. My Instagram username is my first and last name, and I have an uncommon last name, so I'm worried about what he could find next. I changed my username, but he already saw it. My email address also is my first and last name. I'm considering quitting again and am wondering if I'm exaggerating because he hasn't done anything yet. However, he knows my job, full name, Instagram, old phone number, and possibly my address and email. Should I tell his wife or meet up with her? I feel that if I tell my boss, they will just tell me to wait until September, and the police aren't doing anything. I partly blame myself for going back to the job where my problems started, but I love it and it pays well. I think moving to another city would be the best scenario, but I can't afford it right now, hence why I went back to work in the first place. I always carry a rape alarm on me now, feeling that he could appear anytime, and it's so unfair. Please, I need advice. Thank you! Edit: I’m from Ontario Canada!! Relevant Comments Magdovus: Don't delete your socials. That's evidence. Just ignore it, so it's there to show the police. Evidence is key to the police being able to do something - remember that they have to have evidence in order to take action. How did you leave things with his wife? If she asked to be kept up to date then do so, otherwise I'd just check in with her every could weeks. You're doing well dealing with this. I'm glad you got the alarm. Stay strong, and document everything! OOP: she told me i could call her anytime and give me info about him whenever. i just don’t feel comfortable telling her all of this when she doesn’t want anything to do with him so i feel a little stuck. & thank you so much! Quiet_Water0128: This is really scary, OP. This man isn't backing down, he's ramping up his stalking by sending IG requests after you blocked him on IG already. His wife can't fix this. TELL YOUR BOSS and please report his repeated efforts to your local police department. This is stalking. And stop saying, "Hi" to him. At all. No words. You shouldn't have to leave a job to avoid a stalker. OOP: my boss said it would be too stressful on the kids for them to change daycares right now and leave all their friends behind so “for the sake of the kids” we have to wait till september. & yes i know!! i wanna stop saying hi to him but it’s like an automated thing. like as soon as i see a parent or a kid at work i automatically say hi. i didn’t even register it was him at first Status-Biscotti: Have you specifically told him to stop? At this point it seems like you have enough support around you to do so., and you’re not going to get in trouble since they know what’s going on. Can you get your boss to intervene and ask him to stop contacting you? OOP: yes and i have told him i’m not interested. i told my boss but she says to not respond to him   DISCLAIMER: OOP HAS UPDATED AFTER THE BoRU WAS POSTED SO PER RULES UPDATE IS INCLUDED ----NEW UPDATE---- Update #4: June 26, 2024 Hi everyone, just a quick update: I am alive and well. I don’t know why it’s not letting me respond to DMs—maybe it’s me hahaha I barely know how to work the app. I basically live with my friend now. I still go to work but am trying to find a new job. I’m keeping this one until I find another. The only thing is, I don’t know where to apply. I can’t live with my friend forever—she’s trying to find a roommate for July 1st, and I can’t officially move out yet. I feel like if I apply for a job near my house, it would be too easy for him to find me. If I apply far from home, I feel like it would be easier for him to attack me on my way back every day. I’ve been trying to pick up the habit of recording every time I leave my classroom or go outside to gather evidence. I forget sometimes, but I really try. I stopped going to the gym because he knows where it is. He also found my new number—I have no idea how. He keeps calling me, so I always have my phone on do not disturb now. On June 18th, he called me 19 times from different numbers with a 647 area code (it used to be 249). I don’t have concrete proof it’s him, but I can feel it. I changed my email address, deactivated my Instagram, and made a new one with about 15 close friends. I showed the phone calls to the police, and they told me to send the evidence to an email address they gave me. However, since the numbers keep changing, it’s not considered good evidence. They told me to keep trying to find more evidence (isn’t that their job???) and to change my number AGAIN. I also emailed his ex-wife, telling her that he found my Instagram and new number. She replied with a lengthy email, basically advising me not to respond to him because he’s dangerous. She gave me examples of how he used to treat her and her kids. She said he buys their love with toys and that she caught him masturbating to their previous nanny’s pictures. She suggested deleting any photos of me on social media because he might be doing the same with mine. She’s been wanting a divorce for a long time, but he keeps dragging it out. He tells everyone he’s happily married and still wears his ring. She’s terrified for her kids because he always feeds them lies. I deleted my Facebook too. I showed my boss the calls, but she didn’t seem to care and doubted my concerns. She was like, “Do you REALLY think he’s like that? I’ve known him for years, I promise he’s so nice.” I’m actually considering suing them because I think she finds me stupid. I had a panic attack yesterday because I can’t fucking walk without thinking every man behind me is him. I don’t know how to sue someone, let alone a workplace, but I’ll do my research. I bought wasp spray, but I don’t carry it because knowing myself, I will just freeze up and what is he ends up using it on me? Ultimately, I think I’m going to move. I’m considering moving to Montreal—I have a friend there, and I just want to get away from everything. Sorry for posting about the same situation for a month straight, but I don’t want to bother my roommate all the time, and I don’t want to scare her into making me move out. It’s such a weird situation, and it’s hard to explain to people, like it’s not like I’m a celebrity with a crazy stalker fan. But yea little update, I guess I’ll change my number again. (Also my phone’s in french haha don’t mind that, jeudi means Thursday, vendredi means Friday and lundi means Monday). Thank you everyone for the support, I feel less alone.   Latest Update here: BoRU #3   DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7 THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP submitted by /u/Choice_Evidence1983 to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/EffectiveRepair8231 Originally posted to r/AmIOverreacting AIO: I feel like a Dad a the daycare I work at is hitting on me (20f) Trigger Warning: sexual assault, stalking, sexual harassment, mentions of CSA Original Post: May 20, 2024 Hi! I work at a daycare, and I’ve noticed that one of the children's parents always makes inappropriate comments to me. At first, I thought he was just one of those people who always compliment others or that he just wanted to have a friendly relationship with his kids' educators, but now I think it’s more than that. During my first weeks there, I was always assigned to his younger daughter’s group (the babies), so I would see him often. At first, it was brief friendly talk, but it really escalated when I started working with the older kids (4-year-olds). His other daughter, let’s call her Emmy, and I clicked right away when we found out we’re birthday twins. She always wants me to play with her and asks for hugs literally every two minutes. Whenever her dad comes to pick up his kids, she always makes sure to give me a big hug and tells her dad that we’re best friends. Last month, Emmy’s dad and I ran into each other at the grocery store and started small talk. We were mostly talking about Emmy, and he just kept saying how much she loves me and that she wants me to come over to their house. I said something like, “Oh, she’s so cute. I love spending time with her too,” and tried to end the conversation, but he just kept talking. I noticed him looking at my chest a couple of times, which was one of the reasons I wanted to leave. He then offered me a ride, and although I initially declined, he kept pushing it, so I accepted. I didn’t let him see my house; I told him to drop me off downtown. Since then, I keep running into him, but to the point where I don’t think it’s a coincidence. He doesn’t live in the same neighborhood as me (I live near downtown). In fact, when he dropped me off the first time, he kept going on and on about how he could never live somewhere as far away as I do. So why do I keep seeing him? In our conversations, he always makes sure to compliment my physical appearance or mention my age and how “young and smart” I am. It obviously makes me uncomfortable, but for the sake of his daughters, especially Emmy, I don’t really say anything. I have tried to set some boundaries, but it’s really uncomfortable. I jokingly said once, “Well, if I were your age, I don’t think I’d date someone as young as me,” and he was like, “Well, good thing I would,” and he laughed. I casually mentioned this in a conversation with one of my colleagues, and she said something like, “Oh, he’s a flirt; that’s what he does.” She kept talking about how handsome he is (he is handsome but also a married dad of two). I asked if there’s anything we, as educators, could do if, hypothetically, a parent is being too friendly/flirty with us, and she basically said no. Anyway, it’s gotten hot outside, so I’ve started wearing sundresses, shorts, and crop tops, and he always compliments my outfits when he sees me and says he likes seeing my bellybutton piercing out (EW). Also, Emmy has told me that her dad said I’ll be their nanny for the weekends when the daycare is closed. I don’t know if he actually said that because she’s 4, but I don’t even want to ask because I don’t want to give him ideas if he didn’t actually say it. He has tried multiple times to give me his phone number to “call him if there’s anything,” and I always gently reminded him that we can communicate through the daycare app. He always says that he would rather call me directly than through the app. He was being super pushy, and I felt a little trapped, so I gave him my phone number. He texts me all the time, asking what I’m doing, etc. I have FaceTimed his daughters a couple of times, but it just feels wrong. I briefly talked about this to a friend, and she said that she would’ve told his wife. I don’t even think I have the guts to do that. Ever since my friend told me that, I started casually bringing up his wife in conversations. He would always change the subject or say she’s not here. Anyway, all this is to ask: what should I do? Am I imagining things? I feel trapped. I can’t lose my job; I’m scared that it’ll take me forever to find another one. Also, all the kids love me, and I love them. I’ve really gotten attached to them. I love Emmy too, and I mostly feel bad for her. What would you do in this situation? I’ve asked, and you can’t ban a family from attending a daycare, so that option is out of the window. Also, we can’t be on our phones 24/7, so it’s extremely hard to get “evidence.” Anything helps. Thank you! I don’t know i’m I’m posting this on the right subs, if not sorry about that Edit: I’ve never seen his wife, he’s the one who does everything. Emmy has mentioned her a few times (saying things like “Mommy got me this shirt” or something) but I don’t even know what she looks like. He doesn’t talk about her unless I bring her up. Edit 2: About the crop tops, we are allowed to wear them at work with long pants. Same thing with shorts, we can wear them with a non-cropped shirt. 90% of his comments about my piercing were outside of work, when I would run into him. Also, I blocked him. I don’t know if he noticed, but he’s blocked. Edit 3: A lot of people are asking me why/what I am scared of. I don’t have an exact answer. I’ve had a lot of traumatizing experiences with men so I don’t feel comfortable around any man in general. I don’t have any guy friends. It’s like I think of all the things they could do to me if they wanted to, then I get scared/uncomfortable. I know I have a fawn trauma response and I am working on it, I really am. Also, I have work on Friday (or Wednesday maybe) and I will talk to my supervisors and update. Relevant Comments Commenter: “That wouldn’t be appropriate” seems like a good response to 90% of his requests. I would get used to being comfortable saying that to pushy male customers. OOP: i say that sometimes and he’s like “oh well you’re best friends with emmy so we’re basically family” and i get scared so i just laugh it off or i try to end the conversations OOP responds to multiple redditors on not accepting any more things from the father and speak with her supervisor about her concerns OOP: i do say those things and he says that we’re like family because i’m “friends” with his daughter. i don’t always answer and he’ll sometimes bring it up when he drops off/picks up his kids and i say things oh i was busy or i didn’t see it. i keep telling myself that this time ill be direct and just say no but i just get so scared. it’s not like im full on flirting with him, i do reject him but not as firmly as i should i guess. whenever he brings up dating i say things like im not looking for a bf. and for the facetime thing, one time he was being really insistent and i said no and the text time i saw them at work, emmy asked me why i didn’t pick up the call and he said in front of her that i was being mean that day and that i didn’t wanna talk to her. she ended up crying. i tried telling my supervisor and she said that she never noticed any weird behaviour from him and he’s a very friendly man. she asked me if i had any proof which i didn’t. idk what else to do ~ i tried to talk to one of my supervisors about it but rn they’re always busy (they’re the new owners of the daycare so they’re trying to figure everything out) so it’s never a good time. i am alone with my group. i see him in the morning when he’s dropping off emmy and in the afternoon outside when he’s picking his kids up. our conversation in the morning are more brief bc all the parents are coming at the same time so there’s not much time. in the afternoon, he always tells emmy to keep playing with her friends just to buy more time and when i tell him i have to go back to watching everyone he says that there are plenty of other educators who are watching them and not to worry about it. i try to say things like hey i really have to go back to work/now’s not a right time but it’s like there’s nothing i can say to get through to him. im the one in charge of emmy i have to be the one to talk to him about emmy’s day etc   Update #1: May 23, 2024 Hello everyone, I want to thank everyone who gave me advice. I tried to read every comment. Before I give you an update, I need to clarify a few things: I don’t work at a school; it's a private, family-owned (i think) daycare. I have three managers—two women and one man. They became the new owners in January. I primarily interact with one of the female managers. I've tried to discuss this situation with her, but it’s never the right time. For example, I’d knock on her office door and say I needed to talk about Emmy’s dad. She’d say she’s busy and ask me to come back later. When I did, she’d apologize and ask to talk the next day. She also suggested texting, but I didn't feel comfortable telling her everything through text. Some suggested having another teacher watch my group when he arrives, but that’s not possible. In the afternoon, after nap time, we take the kids outside until their parents pick them up. All educators need to stay outside to supervise. When parents arrive, I discuss their child's day and hand over their keychain. It’s difficult because he always approaches me when I’m distracted, so I can’t warn a coworker. Rides: The first time I saw him outside of work was at the grocery store. He recognized me, we chatted briefly, and he offered me a ride. I declined, but he insisted, saying it was ungentlemanly to let me carry groceries alone. He paid for my groceries and drove me home, despite my discomfort. I sat in the backseat, but still. I shouldn’t have said yes. I was just so weirded out by the entire situation. The second time was at a gas station. After hanging out with a friend in his neighborhood, I stopped there for a drink. He saw me and again offered a ride. He was pushy, so I reluctantly agreed. That was the last time I accepted a ride from him. Clothing: Most of his comments about my piercing happened outside of work. I don’t wear revealing clothes to work; I mostly wear sweats. Occasionally, I wear a long sleeve crop top with sweatpants, which my managers don’t mind. We’re allowed to wear mom shorts. But again, I most of the time I wear sweats. Facetime: I’ve Facetimed his daughters three times, and each call lasted less than five minutes. I realize now that this was inappropriate, but yes it happened. Texting: I don’t always respond to his texts. If he texts ten times, I might reply three times. The thing is, he often asks in person why I don’t respond, telling me he had something important to say. He’d sometimes say that in front of Emmy, then say, “You see that Emmy, she’s not nice to Daddy. She doesn’t want to talk to me.” I live in Canada. Some suggested carrying pepper spray for protection, but it’s illegal here, so that’s not an option. I don’t know his exact age, but I’d guess late 30s to mid-40s. I’ve never seen his wife; some suggested they might be separated. Maybe. Emmy has mentioned her mom before, but she seems closer to her dad. The dating comment: I had ZERO idea my comment could be seen as flirting. I thought I was indirectly turning him down. When the topic of dating came up, I said I didn’t want a relationship. He joked that we’d get along great, and I responded by saying “Don’t you think you’re a little too old for me?” And he said, jokingly, “Oh, man. Dont say that. You’re very mature.” That’s when I said that I wouldn’t date someone my age if I were his age. Update: I was only scheduled on Friday this week but ended up working today too. I texted my manager saying that I have something very important to tell her about a parent and that I'm afraid my safety could be compromised. She asked me to come to her office before work to talk about it. I was very scared because reading the comments made me realize that I could lose my job because I gave him my number. But I still told her everything (looking back, I missed a few things, but I told her the most important things). I told her about how, in the beginning (when I was assigned to his 2-year-old daughter's group), he was very friendly and nice to me, but it escalated when I started caring for Emmy. I told her about the grocery incident, the gas station incident, and seeing him near my neighborhood. She kind of "defended" him by saying that I live near downtown, so it’s not a miracle to run into someone there. I then brought up the fact that, yes, I understand that, but he’s told me that he enjoys staying in his neighborhood and that I live so far away, and he doesn’t understand how I'm able to work at a job so far away, so it was weird to see him so much. I think it made her understand more. I told her about the comments about my appearance. I asked her if it was possible to get assigned to another group, and she said yes. I told her about me giving him my number after feeling pressured, and she said that I shouldn’t have done that, that it’s very dangerous to give out personal information like that. She also said that, especially with my job, all communication must be through the app. She said that she was a little more upset at the dad because he’s been attending that daycare for almost four years, and he knows that parents are not allowed to do that. I then told her about how he makes Emmy play with her friends when it’s time to go just to talk to me longer. She said that since I won’t be assigned to Emmy’s group, I won’t even have to talk to him at all. She said that she’ll take care of it and let the other girls know to keep an eye on him. I told her about the Facetimes and how he told Emmy that I was mean for not answering one time and how he made her cry. She only said that that was out of line. I asked if it was possible to “ban” him from attending, and she said maybe. She doesn’t have any solid proof (I showed her some text messages, but she said that he was being friendly in the messages and that there was nothing sexual). She said that most of this was basically hearsay, and she doesn’t have concrete proof of him being an actual predator. As for Emmy, we played together on the playground as usual. I think the hardest part for me is to slowly distance myself from her. I did, however, encourage her to play with her friends, but she would always come back every five minutes to ask to play with me. When her dad arrived, he greeted me and asked me about Emmy’s day and her keychain. I said that I did not take care of her today and pointed to the girl that did. I then got up to get Emmy to tell her to leave. He tried to stop me, but I just kept walking. I didn’t really give him time to talk to me. When I got Emmy, I gave her a hug, then stayed on the other side of the playground, and they left. I know it’s not much, but at least I avoided an interaction with him today. I think that’s it. I tried to answer everything. Edit: He’s never driven me home, I would always ask to drop me off downtown. Typo sorry! Comments Commenter: If he texts you, tell him that you got a memo from work that says all interaction with parents must go through the app with no exceptions for legal and safety reasons and that you can't risk your job. Then block him. Or just block him.   Update #2: May 24, 2024 Hi, I saw some comments asking for an update, so I wanted to share what happened because I am too ashamed to tell someone in real life. I had work from yesterday 8 AM to 5 PM, then went straight to the gym to work out with a friend. I got there around 6 PM and worked out until about 8:30 PM. I was walking home (I live about 10 minutes away from my gym) when I heard someone behind me. Looking back, I know I shouldn’t have walked home, but I didn’t think about it in the moment. I had music in my ears, so I didn’t know if someone was talking to me or on the phone, so I just kept walking. I felt the person getting closer and immediately thought, “Oh my God, what if it’s him?” I started walking a little faster. After about 2 minutes, the person tapped me on the shoulder. When I turned around, it was him. My heart dropped. I immediately froze. I had practiced what to say if I ever got into this situation, but of course I had to forget everything. He acted like we ran into each other and said, “Hey, it’s nice seeing you.” I said, “Hi, nice seeing you, but I have to go.” He complimented my hair (I recently dyed it) and said it looked good on me. I said a quick thank you and tried to leave. He then grabbed my wrist and said, “I don’t like when you act like that.” I just froze up; I couldn’t move. He asked why I don’t take care of Emmy anymore. He said that she constantly asks about me at home and that I make her cry. I stuttered and said I didn’t know, that I’m not the one who decides. I said I have to go now, sorry. He then asked if I blocked him. I said I really can’t talk right now. He then blurted out that he saw me working out. He was doing all of this while grabbing my wrist, mind you. I didn’t know what to say, so I repeated that I had to go. He started looking at me up and down in a disgusting way. He was staring at my boobs while smiling. He then started caressing my arms. One arm stopped at my waist, and the other one kept caressing my arm. He would sometimes move it to my chest and touch me there. I don’t know why I didn’t just punch him in the face. I just could. not. move. Before you ask, I wasn’t wearing anything revealing. I had on a hoodie and sweatpants. I even removed my belly piercing because I don’t like this type of attention. I eventually quietly said, “Can you please stop?” He looked at me, smiled, and then left. I’ve been getting sexually assaulted by men since the age of 7. I promised myself after getting sexually assaulted at 18 by a friend that I would never let it happen again. Now this. I don’t know why this keeps happening. Most of the time, I feel like my body isn’t even mine, just for someone else to use whenever they feel like it, no matter if I want it or not. Maybe it was my fault because I shouldn’t have walked home knowing I had a “stalker”. Maybe it’s my fault because I didn’t tell him to leave me alone earlier. Maybe it’s my fault because I am 20 years old and I can’t fucking say no. I know he didn’t full-on grab my tits and squeeze them, but I feel so so violated. I am too ashamed to reveal this to anyone. I told my boss I was sick to avoid going to work for a couple of days. I went to the police station, but they said there wasn’t anything they could do legally because he didn’t commit actual crimes and that I didn’t really have any proof. I just feel like they didn’t take me seriously. They gave me tips to be more careful like don’t walk late at night, change your number, don’t have the same routine, etc., but that’s it. They won’t give me a restraining order. I’ll be honest, I didn’t understand half of the terminology they were using. But from what I understood, we’re both adults so the texting and Facetimes aren’t incriminating enough. I guess I’ll just stay home. I feel so dirty. I thought I had everything under control because I found a way to avoid him at work, but I guess I was wrong. I genuinely thought that I found a way to make everything stop. The worst part is I saw some comments saying that this whole situation could escalate if he finds out that I’m avoiding him and I didn’t believe them. Again, I was wrong. I don’t know if I’m looking for advice or sympathy, but I don’t have anyone in my life who could help. Maybe some friends, but I am just so ashamed and embarrassed to say that a man was “groping” me and I basically let it happen because I was scared. It’s just humiliating. As for my family, knowing my mom, she would most likely slut-shame me and say it’s my fault. But yeah, here’s the update I guess. I don’t know if I’ll update after this, mainly because I don’t know what else to do. Edit: (copying and pasting this from one of my replies because I can see how it looks): i posted about him 4 days ago but i started having doubts about him stalking be like a month ago i think. i talked to my manager wednesday and i got assigned to another group. i didn’t interact with him wednesday and yesterday. HE is the one saying that his daughter is crying about not seeing me. i know it’s not true, he keeps saying stuff like this. saying things about his daughter to make me feel bad because he knows we’re close. when this incident happened, i went straight to the police station near my home to tell them what happened (bc it’s opened day and night). i asked if with what i have i can have a restraining order and they said no. i know im updating quick but i genuinely don’t have anyone i can talk to about this Edit 2: Okay I think I’ll just quit my job stay with a friend for now. I’ll send an email explaining my situation with my boss and try to find a stay at home job. Thank you all   Latest Update here: BoRU #2   DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7 THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP submitted by /u/Choice_Evidence1983 to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

Walking around the city is a sad state of affairs at times. It feels like as low as 5% of men dressing ‘business casual’ are wearing coherent outfits that fit them well. Otherwise the things I see from day to day in Midtown/on the subway are appalling. Sneakers with dress pants has been beaten to death, but these guys aren’t even trying to make it look good - just a shitty pair of Asics with oversized dress pants draping over them like a tarp. I just now saw a man wearing brown shoes with a black belt, many of these men are wearing dress shirts that have been tumble dried so many times they are barely holding their form. Rolling the sleeves of a long sleeve shirt all the way above the elbow. What is happening? Is this a result of forced dress codes and complacency from people who don’t want to conform? A lot of men also seem to default to the baby blue shirt w/ black pants but 100% of the time it’s ill-fitting. Edit - I’m learning more about rolling up sleeves. Still doesn’t look great to me but I guess it gets a pass submitted by /u/dontevenrlyknow to r/redscarepod [link] [comments]

Last updated: 12/07/19 Edit 32: Couldn't help myself. Added Urban Jurgënsen and Manufacture Royale. Thread is archived so no promises, but feel free to message me with any requests! A. Lange & Söhne: You work in investments, but nowhere as common as Wall Street. You have been known to casually ask to compare balance bridges with Patek owners. Alpina: You are subscribed to Outside magazine, and can quote passages from Krakauer’s “Into the Wild” by by heart. You own a pair of serious hiking boots, but they languish in your closet, unworn and unmuddied. You could not afford a Rolex Explorer. If pressed, you would not be able to articulate why anyone would actually need an “Alpinist” watch. Audemars Piguet: You are a rapper, and you think the brand name is “Royal Oak”. Apple Watch: You are either a secretary or nine-figure earning CEO at a Fortune 500 company. You use your Apple Watch Series 4 to track both your weekly jogs and chicken roasts. 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Corum: You spend most days at your estate's dock, "working" on your teak-decked Sloop, so much so that your wife - for whose birthday you bought a subscription to Sail magazine - calls your Coxswain when she wishes to find you. You exclusively wear Sperry’s and have been known to sport a racing flag tie unironically. You know nothing about watches. Cuervo y Sobrinos: You are a third generation Cuban-American named Jorge living in Buena Vista, Miami. You drink Bacardi Gold as you grill pulled pork at cookouts and play dominos with your Abuelo. You chose your Rubusto to honor your family, culture, and heritage. Secretly, you’re terrified that someone might find out your legal name is George - and that you speak no Spanish. Damasko: You earnestly believe that form must always follow function. You lament the paucity of good quality, acid-resistant PVD watches on the market. As you wear steel-toed hiking boots daily, you wouldn’t be caught dead handling, much less wearing, a gold dress watch. Daniel Wellington: You are a millennial who is into latte art. You think Humphrey Bogart looked so cool in old movies with his suit and trench coat. You are unaware of the terms "quartz" or "automatic". If you're honest, you had a hard time choosing your watch, as they all look the same on the website. You pay $5 a pop at the jewelry store to change Nato straps, which you recently got into. De Bethune: You successfully sold your internet company - with no revenue, let alone income - for $450 million dollars. You love technology, shiny things, and the color blue. You have a life-size replica of the Star Trek: The Next Generation bridge in your Rec room. Diesel: You are either a teenager with vociferous opinions on the PC vs. Console gaming wars, or a playboy far too busy dating multiple women simultaneously to know what that is. Dornblüth & Sohn: You own a grandfather clock, which you wind daily. Your have the same opinion on Roman numerals as on your ex-wife - cluttered, fussy, and confusing. You drive a vintage BMW - in your opinion, the epitome of a functional automobile - before the snazzy marketing made them much too flashy. Ebel: Fresh out of law school, you just got your first associate-level job at a big firm. You wanted something pretty but professional to wear to work. You are confused as to why on dates, men excitedly ask to see your watch, then get close, look disappointed, and say ”oh…an Ebel...”. Edox/Mido: You are a 23 year old German man, fresh out of the University of Heidelberg. Your starter job and soon to be expiring student benefits did not allow you to stretch for a Longines. The salesman’s face visibly fell when you walked through his door. Eterna: Your KonTiki was a Jomashop 75% off gamble. You have since become a fanboy, going so far as to grow a beard and voraciously reading Thor Heyerdahl's memoirs. You will order a nature survival kit, tent, and water purification pills online before you lose all interest and snuggle back up to your PS4. Fortis: You are a young German man living in Düsseldorf. You saved up quite a few paychecks at your Aldi managerial job to afford your Stratoliner. You wish the SR-71 Blackbird was still around. You have re-watched Top Gun 23 times, while imagining that your handle would be “The Baron”. If you ever actually visited an American airbase, you would be disgusted with the wastefulness and vow never to return. Fossil: You are a 25 year old man at your first job. Your workplace has open-plan offices and “Sunday Fundays”. You carefully buckle up your leather watch before dates, and make sure it shows under your cuff. Franck Muller: You are a jocular pediatrician, or possibly, a professional clown. You have a weakness for Tonneau cases and Art Deco numerals. Frederique Constant: You could not afford a JLC Master Ultra Thin Moon, so you got this instead. You are unsuccessfully trying to make a 42mm dress watch work for your wrist. You were shocked, and a little disappointed, when you learned that the company was founded in 1988. Garmin: You are subscribed to Men's Health and GQ. Before leaving for work, you lace up your running sneakers and strap on your Forerunner in case you can get a quick run in on the way home. This never happens. Your Bowflex sits quietly in your garage, gleaming and untouched. Ginault: You spent $1,449 on a Rolex Submariner Homage. You while away countless man-hours on the forums, defending the brand from baseless accusations. You will ultimately purchase Hulk, Pepsi, and Daytona homages from other brands, and with time, will have spent more on replicas than the cost of the real thing. Girard-Perregaux: You swear that the Laureato is “the next Overseas”, and that the Golden Bridges are an under appreciated masterpiece. You purposely chose a 1966 over a JLC Master Ultra Thin. Secretly, you wonder if you made a mistake. Glashütte Original: You, overall, cannot afford a Lange. Glycine: You’ve outgrown the flashy Invicta's of your youth, but are still hesitant to go smaller than 46mm in a watch. Secretly, the vaguely military associations of your Combat Sub mildly arouse you. If he were alive to see it, Eugène Meylan would throw an egg at your face. Glycine - Vintage: You live in an old age home, with your WWII Purple Heart and military induction papers tucked away discreetly in a corner. You still wear the Airman which you bought on the base at Ramstein in ’49. Sadly, your grandson only visits to eye it covetously. Graham: You couldn’t resist a watch whose crown is easily confused with a grenade’s firing pin. Your Volkswagen Golf has vanity plates and a silkscreened pin-up on the rear window. You have a shrine to your grandfather in your room, a WWII vet with the British Expeditionary Force, though he only got to flee Dunkirk. Even you suspect the “Watchmakers Since 1659” claim is crap. Grand Seiko: You think a Spring Drive is the coolest thing since sliced bread. You frequently photograph your Cocktail Time with your Sony camera or, in a pinch, your latest generation iPhone. You have bookmarked Youtube videos of the Grand Seiko factory - in case you meet someone with a Swiss made watch who needs a little convincing. You wish Seiko would do marketing better. Grönefeld: While trained at RADA, you have peaked as a recognizable, but under-appreciated Hollywood actor. You have impeccable taste and a thing for Salmon dials. You wanted something dressier than your sponsored but boring Omega to wear to the Met Gala. G-Shock: You are a junior in college, or an emergency room physician. You delight in taking your G-Shock to watch meet-ups, to the horror of the traditionalists. You recently took up mountain biking just to post Instagram photos of your watch on the trails. H. Moser & Cie: You have a mischievous sense of humor, and in high school, were known to film pranks you pulled on your friends. You have an insatiable weakness for fume dials. While you can’t quite put your finger on it, you suspect the brand will be worth a lot in coming years - or so you tell anyone who will listen. Deep down, you are terrified your Endeavor might just be a passing fad. Hamilton: You recently graduated college. You spent hours on the watch forums, debating between this or a Longines. You finally settled on the Jazzmaster/Khaki, though the salesman couldn't tell you anything about it. The highlight of your life was when a random woman on a date said, “nice watch”. You almost married her. Hautlence: You have a game room in your Park Avenue, per-war classic six filled with pinball machines. You wear pink glasses, to let your underlings at your Goldman Sachs job know that you can be “cool” too. You are not. Hermes: You are either a perfumer living in the Montmarte district of Paris, or an American woman with an unerringly good fashion sense. Hublot: You are, simply, wrong. HYT: You are a successful electrical engineer with lucrative patents to your name, or an internet startup founder that actually solved and monetized a hard problem in computer science. You love nothing more than to hand your H1.0 over to curious passerby, while pontificating upon the intricacies of fluid dynamics. Invicta - Type 1: You are a non-watch geek dad in a suburban shopping mall. You wanted to get "something nice" for yourself. You find sub 46mm watches "too girly". You enjoy explaining to others, with wide-eyed delight, how your watch is powered by "moving your arm". Invicta - Type 2: You are in high school, without a summer job. You think the Rolex Submariner is the perfect modern, go anywhere, do anything watch. You feel ostracized on the watch forums, but can’t help but smile when you see your Pro Diver on your wrist. IWC: You are openly not a pilot, but enjoy having an altimeter strapped to your wrist. Jacob & Co: You are a formerly successful, now destitute rapper. You pawned this watch at a significant loss. Jaeger-LeCoultre: You exclusively dress in suits, except on bank holidays, when you wear chinos and your Reverso. You are frequently found on watch forums extolling “the watchmaker's watchmaker” virtues. You think 100M of waterproofing is all anyone should ever need. Your will instructs your heirs to bury you with your Atmos clock, as they surely won’t appreciate it. You hope one day to be able to roll your R’s like the guy in the boutique. Jaquet Droz: You are either a well diversified collector, or an Arabian Shiek from an oil rich kingdom. If the latter, your other watch is a Rolex Daytona Rainbow with diamond bezel. Johan Eric: You googled “watch” on Amazon and this is the first thing you found with Prime shipping. In general, you are decidedly not picky, both in watches and in life. JS Watch Co: While you used to have a very generous circle of friends, your incessant droning on about your trip to Iceland and the sweet Frisland you scored there soured even your most steadfast companions. You now spend most days online, nostalgically looking at Tripadvisor reviews for restaurants in Reykjavik, or re-watching the Lord of the Rings for the twelfth time. Junghans: You were just hired by a big design firm, but on a starter salary. You visit your local art museum on “free admission weekends”, and hang around free gallery shows. You have a small tattoo on your right bicep. You hope to upgrade to a Nomos one day. Klasse14: You favorite Instagram influencer subtly bombarded you with sponsored posts showcasing the brand. You hope your Miss Volare will one day star in your own epic selfie in front of the Eiffel Tower. Kobold: Your “keeper” test is if she’ll watch all six seasons of the Sopranos with you. Your most treasured possession is an autographed napkin from the late, great, James Gandolfini. Since his passing, your interest in the brand has cooled, and secretly, you worry that your Spirit of America is just a more expensive Shinola. Laco: As you gaze admiringly at the Saarbrücken on your wrist, you find yourself wondering: Was Hitler really that bad? Lip: You are a Frenchman originally from Toulouse. You work for the Bureau of Weights and Measurements, converting metric measurements to Napoleonic Mesures Usuelles for those still living in the First Republic. While you would prefer to wear an Omega, you can only imagine the shocked “Non!” That would emanate from the mustachioed lips of your supervisor, Gaspard, upon seeing it, and you’d rather avoid an employee tribunal. You’d win, but it’s a hassle. Longines: You just got your first job out of college. You are looking for something classy and professional to go along with your first real suit. You will one day own a JLC. Lorus: You are a street-peddler living in Hyderabad. You cannot afford a Seiko 5, but not for any reason that would be remotely funny. Luminox: You constantly talk about “doing an Ironman”. You sleep in a Naval Academy t-shirt and proudly fly the “thin blue line" US flag on your porch. You make vague allusions to former service when asked, but secretly, you were only a mall cop in the 90’s. Manufacture Royale: Liberace would like to know where you got your watch. Marathon: You are a former United States Marine, 3rd Battalion, 6th. You wore this watch on patrol in Kandahar, where your buddy scratched his initials on the case back. This is either a faithful re-telling, or you have entirely imagined the above scenario for color at your current office job. Maurice Lacroix: The year is 1995. Bill Clinton is president of an economically resurgent USA. You just got promoted to Assistant to the Regional Department President of your longtime employer, IBM. Having recently heard about the value of a “Fine Swiss Watch”, you decided to purchase your Pontos after seeing an ad for it in the pages of Sports Illustrated. It feels right. MB&F: You are an angel investor in various internet start-ups. You believe in “thinking different” and “changing the world”. Having gone through the various Pateks, Langes, and Journes that befit your station, you now find pretty much every other watch brand ridiculously boring. You wear an Apple watch concurrently on your other wrist. MeisterSinger: You purposefully wear subtly mismatched socks with your corduroys. You carry your daily possessions in a fanny pack, considering it more practical than a messenger bag. You are perpetually 10-15 minutes late to all your appointments. Secretly, you have a thing for amputee girls. Michael Kors: You are a 16-33 year old woman. Your house is filled with rose-gold colored accessories. You shop at Macy’s, where you purchased this watch to match your handbag. In the watch world, you are actually one of the sane ones. Mondaine: You either have a collection of hair mousses to apply based on the weather, or are an oddly obsessive spotter of Swiss electric trains. Montblanc: You couldn’t afford a JLC. You have since taken to the watch forums, declaring the superiority of Minerva, stating, “it’s over for the over $5K’s”. Secretly, you also hate stacked movement complications. Montegrappa - Chaos by Sylvestor Stallone: What the hell is wrong with you? Moritz Grossman: You are the head of an old family manufacturing firm in Bavaria. Your frauline, Hilda, urged you to finally treat yourself and upgrade from the reliable but tired Swatch on your wrist. Feeling a Lange was too recognizable to the men on the assembly line, you chose the Benu Power reserve, but only to wear at board meetings. Movado: You are either a 21 year old man wearing a Movado Bold at the club, or an 83 year old gentlemen wearing an original Museum piece. There is no middle ground. Mühle Glashütte: Your evangelical zeal for the brand makes you the human embodiment of those “allow notifications?” pop-ups. You dream of becoming a mariner. MVMT: You are a millennial who drives a motorcycle. You have a collection of leather jackets. You hope someone comments on how well your watch matches your sunglasses. Nixon: You are a 32 year old man named either Chad or Brad living in Encinitas, California. As you spend most days on the beach surfing in your board shorts, you have a perpetual tan even in winter. You aren’t into watches, but your Base Tide was giving you good vibes from the surf-shop window, and it matches your leather Yogi bracelet perfectly. Nomos: While you initially could not afford a Swiss made watch in art school, you are now a successful Bahaus-style architect. You have a membership to your local modern art museum. While you prefer espresso, you drink drip from a vintage Braun coffee maker. Apple “Keynote Days” are like Christmas in June. Ochs and Junior: You sincerely collect promotional posters for modern art exhibits. You have an interesting job in either advanced engineering or product design at a well funded startup in Berlin. Somewhat obsessively, you refuse to wear any items with visible brand names. Even you can’t always tell what the hell the date is on your perpetual calendar. Oris: You are frequently found on watch forums, starting, “Why buy an Omega when you can get virtually the same quality for half the cost?” You think the Sixty Five is exactly what your grandfather would’ve worn - if he was cooler, and not a rural school teacher from Iowa. You are secretly trying to save for a Rolex Sub, but need the cash for your PADI training. Omega: You are intimately familiar with all 12 manned Apollo missions. You eagerly anticipate the next James Bond film. You refer to your Seamaster as “the thinking man’s Sub, with a better movement”. Bonus points if you know who George Daniels is. Orient: You are a senior in high school. You love your Bambino, but as you know watches, you don’t claim it’s equivalent to something more expensive. You dream of winning the lottery. You are pure. Panerai: You frequently exclaim, “What’s the point of wearing a watch if no one sees it?” You live in California, and exclusively wear short sleeves. You are unusually familiar with the Italian Navy’s WWII operations, glossing over the period 1940-1943. Parmigiani Fleurier: You are the scion of an old, proud Italian banking family. While you of course have a few Patek’s tucked away in the vault at your Lago Maggiora villa, your father, Luca, gifted you your Tonda Tourbillon because he errantly believed it was an Italian brand “like from the old days, bene!” You don’t have the heart to correct him. Parnis: You desire a replica Daytona, but your country’s customs force is extremely efficient at confiscating goods that violate trademarks. Patek Philippe - Type 1: You took off from work to watch the Henry Graves Super Complication auction livestream. You think the Nautilus is overvalued, preferring the khaki green Aquanaut instead. You are possibly John Mayer, but if not, you hope one day to actually own your own Patek. Patek Philippe - Type 2: You are a Russian oligarch. You assert that a hacking seconds “damages the movement”. Though you’ll never say so openly, you are secretly jealous of the finishing on a Lange. You feel reassured when you see one of those “For the next generation” ads. Philippe Dufour/Laurent Ferrier/F.P. Journe: You are a Russian oligarch, but with exquisite taste. Piaget: You claim that the Calatrava and Patrimony "smell of old man". You frequently end arguments with "yeah, but...thinest movement in the world." You cannot actually afford a Calatrava or Patrimony. Poljot: In the old days, you were a MiG-23 fighter pilot for the Motherland. Your Poljot, along with your state-issued Volga GAZ-24 sedan, marked you as a man of importance among the proletariat. Sadly, in your current job as grocery store guard, only the old babushkas recognize your former glory. It would kill you to know that 30-year old gamers bought your watch online because they thought the Cyrillic on the dial looked cool. Rado: You are a material scientist tenured at a prestigious university. You have no interest in watches, but could not pass up the mystery and wonder of a watch that never scratches. Everything from your pots to your pants are coated in Teflon. Raymond Weil: Are you sure you aren’t wearing a Maurice Lacroix with Roman numerals? RGM Watch Co: You are a 62-year old Boomer living in Pittsburgh, PA. As you are retired - with pension - from your job as a chemical engineer for US Steel, you have plenty of time to hobnob on Timezone.com. You post multiple photos of your 801-COE in various lights, to the eager approval of all twelve forums members. You can’t tell anyone, but you voted for Donald Trump. Richard Mille: If you weren’t an American billionaire, you’d probably be buying an Invicta - with the logos removed, you surely couldn’t tell the difference. You make sure to wear your watch when interviewed by Fortune, with the sleeves of your silk Dolce & Gabana shirt rolled up. Roger Dubuis: You are a Argentinian Striker, recently relocated to the UK with Manchester United. Stacy, your loyal WAG, got you the Excalibur after you instructed your assistant to leave notes around your Wilmslow mansion with explicit purchasing instructions. All involved acted surprised on your birthday. If you are being honest, you sometimes confuse it with your Richard Mille. Roger W. Smith: You are the scion of a Japanese telecommunications fortune. You love discussing horology, but only online. You are that unusual combination of billionaire and introvert, perhaps due to your secret insecurity in your own abilities. You fantasize about how one day, Otuo-San will notice your Series 2, and nod approvingly at you with his tight-lipped grimace. In your own quiet way, this is how you show off. Rolex - Sub (Ha!) Type A: ROLEX ROLEX ROLEX. YOU CAN’T BUY ANYTHING BUT A ROLEX IT’S THE ONLY THING WITH RESALE VALUE. HAVE YOU SEEN MY TWO-TONE SUB WITH THE CYCLOPS? I LIKE IT ‘CAUSE IT HAS WRIST PRESENCE. Rolex - Sub Type B: You frequently re-watch all Sean Connery Bond films, asserting that Daniel Craig is not a “real” Bond. You know the difference between the 1016 Caliber 1560 and 1016 Caliber 1570. You believe steel can stretch with minimal effort. You prefer watches with rusted dials and no date. As you frequently speak full sentences consisting solely of reference numbers, it is assumed by passerby that you work for a secretive government agency. Rolex - Sub Type C: You are a successful Italian-American contractor. You wear a two-tone Datejust - your only watch - which never leaves your wrist. On vacation at the resort in Cabo, you make sure your wrist is angled properly so the waiter can see it when taking your order. Rolex - Sub Type D: When you found out your wife was pregnant, you rushed to purchase a "birth year" Sub. Your son will not get to wear it until you are dead. Rolex - Sub Type E: You are a researcher who spends all day next to an MRI machine. While you never wore a watch before, you found yourself suddenly desperate for one after seeing an eerily personalized ad for the Millgauss pop up on Facebook. After the initial triumphant forum pic, the novelty wore off, and most days you just check the wall clock. Romain Jerome: You have no compunctions wearing a watch made from the Titanic. You have more money than sense. Scuderia Ferrari: Your friends know not to utter the word “Lamborghini” for fear of starting a rant. Your firstborn son is named Enzo. Your Pilota watch, Ferarri ball-cap, keychain, and limited edition Scuderia Ferrari for Ray-Ban aviators all proudly accompany you as you step into your 2004 Honda Civic. Seagull: It took quite a few shifts at the Dairy Queen, but you finally got your Ocean Star. You feel like you need a dress piece too, but are unsure when you’d ever wear it. One day, with a JLC on your wrist, you will look back upon this time wistfully. Seiko: You are starting college this Fall. You spend most days on watch forums, hoping to find newbies asking for help so that you can steer them your way. You think the Seiko 5 is the best value per dollar in horology. Deep down, you know that if you ever won the lottery, you’d trash them all for a stable of platinum Langes. Sekonda: On the way to a job interview as a Transport of London station cleaner, you decide a watch will make you look more reliable. You grab the cheapest Sekonda Classic from Mr. Singh’s newsstand, and make sure to check it copiously during your interview. You are surprised when you do not get the job. Changing the dead battery three days later, you are puzzled by the Cyrlic writing inside the case. Shinola: You are a Clinton, or an oddly proud Detroit native. You think the “Made in the USA” controversy was a hit job egged on by Hodinkee. You have average sized wrists, but think they are larger than they really are. You have a weakness for wire lugs. Sinn: You are subscribed to the WatchBuys newsletter. You cannot afford an IWC. You post numerous photos of your Sinn 356 Flieger, in a vain attempt to reassure yourself that the acrylic crystal was the right choice. Skagen: You drive a used but well loved Volvo. While you know nothing about watches, you found it cumbersome to check your dumb phone for the time, and began your search for something practical but affordable. As you know the quickest shortcut to get to the cafeteria at your local IKEA - where you get the meatballs weekly - an ostensibly Danish watch held some appeal. You are unaware that Denmark and Sweden are different countries. Speake-Marin: ”A touch loud? What do you mean, leopard print pants with a leather jacket is loud?” Squale: You cannot afford a Rolex Submariner. Steinhart: You could not afford a Rolex or IWC. While you truly enjoy wearing your Hulk Sub homage, deep-down, you question where the line is between imitation and theft. Stowa: You enjoy having an altimeter strapped to your wrist, but cannot afford an IWC. You would love to mention its WWII history, but are unsure how to do so without appearing insensitive. Stührling: American Airlines flight 1257, direct to Dallas, seat 48B. Two hours in, You saw the Depthmaster in the pages of SkyMall and knew you couldn't pass it up. Swatch: You are a child in elementary school, or a successful, established artist. You love color. You have a watch collection, but they are all Swatches. You wish you could buy another one of the Irony whose crystal cracked when you dropped it on your kitchen floor. Swiss Legend: You could’ve bought the Esq. brand chrono - with the same Chinese Quartz movement - for $139, but then it would’t say “Swiss” on the dial, would it? Tag Heuer: Your first “real” watch was a Link, which you initially saw in the pages of Golf Digest/Tennis Magazine. For the longest time, you had a crush on Maria Sharapova. The chip on your shoulder is slightly lessened when you see photos of vintage Carreras online. Timex: You are a senior citizen, or an aspiring US presidential candidate. In either case, your grandson is suddenly asking to borrow your watch. Tissot: You just got your first job out of college, but it pays less than the Longines fellow. You appreciate either classic or ridiculously bold design. After a long career, you will one day own a Rolex. Triwa: You are a full-time Instagram influencer. Perhaps one day, you will regret the purchase of your Donald Trump “Comb Over” watch - but not today. Tudor: You assert that the Black Bay 58 is what Rolex “used to be”. You take pride in the quality of the bezel on your Pelagos. You either never will admit, or say all the time, that you wish you had a Rolex. Tutima Glashütte:As the only way to acquire a Lange would be to sell a kidney, you eagerly sought out an alternative still made in your mythical Glashütte. You fancy yourself a sportsman, though this is usually only expressed by the bench press. While you wear your Grand Flieger daily, if pressed, you could not articulate why, exactly, your watch had to be German. Ulysse Nardin - Type 1: What exactly do you think you are, some kind of enthusiast? Ulysse Nardin - Type 2: As soon as you saw the Minute Repeater Voyeur - with a lifelike orgy scene on the dial, complete with moving “parts” - you knew you needed that kind of artistry in your life. Urban Jurgënsen: Was your watch produced by the Swedish Chef? Vacheron Constantin: You think a Calatrava is an ugly duckling compared to the all-encompassing beauty of a Patrimony. You refer to the period from 1987 - 1996 as “the Dark Times”. You wish resale value were higher, but blame Patek fanboys. Various Microbrands: You are subscribed to the “Affordable Watches” forum on WatchUSeek. You have a Google Alert on Kickstarter so you don’t miss the latest limited release. You are saving for a vintage Rolex, which increasingly appears out of reach. You are filled with a mixture of delight and despair when someone asks, "is that a Rolex?" of your Mk II Nassua. You have a love/hate relationship with Jason Lim of Halios. Various Vintage: You are Fred Savage. You think anything over 36mm is garish. While you wear your vintage Omega (original dial, of course) all the time, you have been known to slip on your modern Rolex Sub for the beach. You spend your weekends at estate sales, dreaming of coming across an unrecognized Patek for $150, which you bargain down to a clean $100. Victorinox: After your brief fling with Chinese watches, you decided it was time to step up to Swiss made. You wear your Fieldforce proudly in Econ 101, desperately hoping Brittany will notice it. Plus, you already had the matching backpack. Vostok: You are a value-oriented teen gamer, or an elderly Russian pensioner. You have 9 inch wrists. Zenith: You make half-hour long YouTube videos consisting of you chanting into the camera, “El Primero. El Primero. First Automatic. El Primero.“ You scoff at the JLC 751A as a rushed copy. Deep down, you believe the world is unjust, and fear your brand will never be properly recognized. Zodiac/Doxa: You are a certified Master Scuba Diver Trainer. You smile indulgently at your wealthy tourist clients, who have Submariners and Fifty Fathoms on their wrist. After you've been tipped, you love nothing better than to hand over your SeaWolf/Shark for inspection, casually stating "This baby's been down to 250 feet, no problems. How about yours?" Edit: Adding some more as suggestions. Last batch was: Frederique Constant, Junghans, Hamilton, Nomos, Panerai, Tag, Tissot, Tudor. Also split Invicta into two. Thanks for my first gold and kind words stranger! Edit 2: Some are disappearing when I make edits, re-added Swatch. Edit 3: Added Bell & Ross, Baume et Mercier, Sinn, Various Microbrands. Edit 4: Added Various Vintage. Thanks agin for the gold! Edit 5: Added Glashütte Original, Jaquet Droz, Stowa. Edit 6: Couldn't help myself, added Jacob & Co, Oris, Squale, Zodiac/Doxa. Edit 7: Added Fossil and Michael Kors. Modified Daniel Wellington. My first Platinum, thank you! Edit 8: Added GP and Zenith, split Seiko/Grand Seiko, and added one more Rolex Sub (phrasing!) Type (D). Recognized John Mayer as the Patek expert he really is. Edit 9: Added Movado. Slight tweak to Hamilton. Edit 10: Added Piaget. Edit 11: Added Montblanc, Richard Mille, Shinola, and Steinhart. Edit 12: Added Bremont, Edox/Mido, Parnis. Edit 13: Added Christopher Ward, De Bethune, and MB&F. Modified Frederique Constant. Edit 14: Added Bulova, Franck Muller. Edit 15: Modified Franck Muller, added Marathon. Edit 16: Added Laco (hat tip to Byki!), Maurice Lacroix. Edit 16: Added Swiss Legend. Edit 17: Added Damasko, Dornblüth & Sohn, Garmin, Klasse14, and split Ulysse Nardin into Types 1&2. Edit 17: Added Ball (hat tip to AudiMars and icecityx1221). Clarified that 12 Apollo missions only were manned. Thanks for the sticky Mods! I am humbled. Edit 18: Split Casio into Casio and G-Shock; added Concord and Ebel. Edited Marathon for clarity. Edit 19: Added Bovet, Hermes, HYT, Seagull, and Victorinox. Edit 20: Added Chopard, Corum. Edit 21: Added BVLGARI, Diesel, Glycine new and vintage, and Rolex Sub Type E. Edit 22: Added Chanel, Christiaan Van Der Klaauw, and Rado. Edit 23: Added Apple Watch, H. Moser & Cie, Ochs and Junior, and Scuderia Ferrari. Edit 24: Added Montegrappa Chaos, Romain Jerome, Stürhling Edit 25: Added Azimuth, Certina, Ginault, Graham, Johan Eric, Lip, Sekonda, Skagen. Edit 26: Added Carl F. Bucherer and Nixon. Edit 27: Added Alpina, Meister Singer, and updated Sekonda. Edit 28: Thanks so much for the Gold! Added Cuervo y Sobrinos, Eterna, Hautlence, Grönefeld, Luminox, Moritz Grossman, Speake-Marin, and Triwa. Edit 29: Added Balticus, Burberry, Kobold, and JS Watch Company. Edit 30: Added Lorus, Roger W. Smith, Mühle Glashütte and Tutima Glashütte. Edit 31: Added Fortis, Mondaine, Poljot, RGM Watch Co. and Roger Dubuis. Edit 32: Couldn't help myself. Added Urban Jurgënsen and Manufacture Royale. Thread is archived so no promises, but feel free to message me with any requests. Last updated: 12/07/19 submitted by /u/jooxii to r/WatchesCirclejerk [link] [comments]

TL;DR: I think Teemo's okay. Around 2008, Riot decided they needed a lighter end to their spectrum of champions. A race, so to speak, of creatures that were more jovial in portrayal than the dark kind they had been pouring their resources into. Led by a Rioter known only as 'Ezreal,' they developed Him in the still Indie-company-sized studio of Riot Games. Him. Genesis. From Him, a new race would come to be. From the hairless and often explosive females to the oft-dramatic males for and against Bandle's safety, all with their own undertakings. Most won't remember Him as the lawless origin to the race called Yordles. To many, too many, He is but an image in the Mind's eye, of a moppish-yet-sturdy smile. For others, the image is a scope in the hands of He, capable explorer and scout. For me, it was the story of a log, a paw, and a vaulting motion towards the player--invitation, demonstration and warning all in one. When I was in the last year of high school, my friends introduced me to League of Legends. I don't have the wherewithal to remember what season I joined. What do I remember in those first few games among friends? We were in a skype call. After some, if I may admit it, boring matches, I fled to the store to find someone more entertaining than Annie and Warwick to play. I saw Him. And spoke words my friends couldn't hear for they were whispered between the creature before me, and my quivering lips. "Oh my god, Teemo." "I thought you hated the game," my friends teased in the days afterward. I'd laugh off the question and say, "Top, please!" Then lock in Teemo, the Swift Scout. A smile pressed across my lips as I previewed my several skins, admiring the way they changed the context of this... this thing, rapidly encroaching on my impressionable young mind. What was it about Him that made me so eager to play League? Soon enough, as my friends either stagnated or stopped playing altogether. The introduced became the tenured, though my advice wasn't useful to new players. All I knew how to do was play Him. Q. Blinding dart. The force of those lungs. W. Move Quick. The work of His legs. E. Toxic Shot. His ingenuity. R. Noxious Trap. A calling card. I dreamt of walking down a road one day and spotting one in my path. Returning it to him and receiving a thank you for my time. But even in this domain I was left lacking, because the part of League that captivated me most was champ select... peering upon Teemo's splash, trying to capture the same feeling I had that first, blinding moment in high school. What had enamored me? I could see bits and pieces, yet a recollection of the entire artwork eluded me, and I began to grow frustrated and toxic. I risked being banned--after a two week warning, I realized I must go on a pilgrimage. On a road to discovery, to study Teemo and discover why this Yordle made me so passionate. And here I am today. Join me as we dissect what it means to be Teemo. Part one: a glimpse of his body. Imagine, if you will, the lush jungle of Kumungu. A buzzing, hot place full of danger at every step, yet rewarding travelers with constant doses of serenity and fae beauty. It is hard to imagine every single wonder this jungle can provide, nor their extent. Already its tall palms, the gromps that hop in massive packs to avoid predators, the rolling stones called Krugs, all assault your ability to separate fact from fiction. Wiping sweat off your brow, you stumble through the brush to emerge on a small clearing. The Kumungu hushes itself and you grow cautious, afraid of whatever laid in store in this sunny, almost picturesque relief. A campsite. You walk closer, setting down your things to inspect it. There is a small campfire, snuffed before dawn, and a swirl of broken twigs where a small body sat. As your surroundings continue to swirl about you as if the scene has trapped you in the reverie of another person, the true remnants of this campsite are revealed. The safety of it all, the confidence of a settler to sleep alone in the Kumungu. You imagine the quiet happiness of a creature who has had the honor to tame the jungle, breathing breath and circulating the blood of an adventurer through his diminutive and constantly-aware body. You imagine its leavings, a bundle of tinder, a rock utilized as a pestle. It sleeps in its own, victorious body. It survives with the intellect of its own mind. You glance back at your bag of man-made tools--and feel nothing but the worst scorn imaginable! What shame the scene drives in you, to be ever-reliant on the success of other men! You wish to lie prostrate right there in the middle of the clearing and plead, nay, pray for the same insight. Standing up from your journey into the mind of this legend, a noise breaks the spell. The bout of madness is over. You twist around to see what made the rustling. A chipper laugh. "HAHEEUHEAU." Gone. But all of that shameful energy has turned into determination. Leaving your pack on the ground, you deign to live as the animals do. Part two: to be a maid in his home. "Excuse me, maid," Teemo calls from the back room of his humble home in Bandle City, "I will be leaving again soon. Please leave my shoes outside my door." Your heart skips a beat. The Yordle, he, oh god, he just arrived home mere minutes ago. When accepting this job out of the classifieds, taking it for granted, an opportunity to travel, you never accounted for such a creature like the Swift Scout. Like Jane Eyre on her walk outside Thornfield, simply delivering mail and resuming her telltale boredom at a casual pace, your first sight of Teemo exploded the monotony decades hence. Rushing inside, covered in dust. Bootprints trailing on the sandalwood floors--"don't worry," you remember mumbling, "I can clean it up." "That's your job, right?" Teemo asked. You wouldn't know, but you caught him in a jovial, rather than murderous, mood. "I forgot, I haven't been home. Let's share a drink." The two of you sat across from one another. Teemo poured Bandle bourbon into two glasses. The large pitcher sloshed forward and you caught him catching it... tendons underneath his furred arm tensing. You weren't going to be able to keep this job, you surmise. Teemo carried the conversation on, while you imagined how the aftertaste of bourbon must feel on the back of his little throat. To think such a small, pernicious thing could knock more drinks down than you... And at this trying time, where you almost lost it all, he hadn't asked you to move his shoes. You near the boots of swiftness, breathing heavy. It takes a moment's preparation to reach down and grab them. Your fingers slip into them, and are greeted by warm air. The heat hasn't yet left the boots. Oh, Christ above!! They are still hot from use! From pounding, over, over, and over, over, and over, on the dirt ground underneath Teemo's feet!! Teemo shoots out of his bath, throwing a towel over himself. "Is everything okay?" He cries. "Did you slip?" All his visage does is earn another howl from your addled mind, yet so much panic forces you into a cooled state. Everything slows down while Teemo awaits an answer, you on the floor, he dripping wet with a head full of shampoo-bubbles. An offer begins to form on your lips. But then the scene ends. Part Three: His Fingers. Dear Riot, I heard you were changing the champion portraits. I have something to ask. Can you please make it so we can choose what part of the skin becomes the portrait? I really want my portrait to be Omega Squad Teemo's fingers. There is something about the singular makeup of his furred digits that inspires me to play better. My breathing becomes heavy, as if I am running a marathon at record pace, and my reaction times turn frenzied--almost as good as a scripter! When I imagine Omega Squad Teemo's fingers curled around my, sorry, his dart gun, I position better, I am more positive in games towards my fellow summoners. Can we do an AMA with the League artist who designed Teemo's fingers? I want to know why they chose that enticing groove, the perfect length of each follicle, the same-colored claws! Jesus Christ, I can imagine the thin veins running beneath those killer points, almost as much as I can smell Teemo's fingers curling under my chins mere moments before he SNAPS. MY. NECK. But then there is something else. The rotating game mode... Zigg's fingers are right out in the open, naked but for the pen in the clutch of his paws. Oh god, who draws these Yordles and their fingers? Have I said fingers a lot? Sorry. Imagine finding one of their perfect strands on your pillowcase, or floating in the broth of your chicken Campbell soup. You pick it up, holding it against a fluorescent light, and see its golden integrity in full. I want to have this moment happen forever and ever. If only you would give me the CHANCE. PLEASE, PLEASE GIVE ME JUST A GLIMPSE OF OMEGA SQUAD TEEMO'S RESPLENDANT DIGITS! I CANT HOLD BACK ANYMORE!!! Every time I am in school, at dinner, alone in my room, those fingers crawl under my clothing and pull me down into the fiery throes of passion. Please, please, please give me this feature or I don't know what will happen to me next. Part Four: A doughy dream. You are eating pancakes at mom's. There is a television on the kitchen counter, where she catches up on the latest news. The nonstop coverage of some political debate finally shuts up for commercials. Still groggy, the popping colors and loud noises of these ads entertain you. That is, until a cereal ad breaks away into a scene for Pillsbury biscuits. Your mind snaps out of half-sleep, so sudden your mom gives a peripheral glance to see what's the matter. It was like any other commercial from Pillsbury, involving a mascot selling some new brand of processed dough. Yet, and yet... the Pillsbury Doughboy had been replaced by Teemo. You spit out your mouthful of cereal back into your bowl, lean in, start to go off-kilter with fascination. "Press my belly again!" Teemo pleads. The stay-at-home mom in the commercial complies, a skeptical smile on her face as she presses in the scout's stomach. "Hoh-oh! Hee hee hee!" Sliiiide. Crack. Did your hand just act on its own, breaking your mom's expensive, favorite ceramic bowl? She says something and rushes off to fetch the broom. Now she has left you alone with Pillsbury Teemo. As you thought, the sly creature had been waiting for such a distraction. That the two of you met here was no matter of circumstance--Teemo immediately breaks away from the T.V mom, then gestures for you to come closer. "Would YOU like to press my tummy?" Teemo asks. You stand up, still with enough sense to avoid the broken ceramic. Teemo, the T.V mom, both wave you on like you're a marathon runner finishing the last leg of the race. Five fingers battle for which will do the honor, until you are sure the anticipation will break your hand. Then. Fizz. That was the static of the television prickling the fur on your index finger. Smiling, dumb, you press Teemo's exposed belly. "Hee hee hee, come with meee!" You are sucked inside the commercial! The other boys, real jocks and always needed a snack after their big game, stand aside for Teemo's honored guest. "Make me small like you," you beg. Teemo waves an arm and you start to notice the counter grow in size. "Yes, yes, yes!" Oh man, it is the best time, the greatest time, an excursion so pleasurable you think it might throw you into an aneurism. Thank you, god! Thank you, Pillsbury! Thank you, thank you--your feet makes small impressions in the dough as you and Teemo play tag, giggling like schoolgirls, while all the other members of your new family urge you on. Teemo tugs you down into the dough and the two of you snuggle together. "Are you ready to be together forever?" He asks. You give a muted nod, somehow knowing what comes next. T.V mom lifts up the tray of biscuits, telling the kids whoever behaves the best gets the 'specialest' biscuit. As the tray enters the oven, the scorching heat melting the skin on your backside, you wake up. Real mom is crossing her arms, angry. You fell face-first into your bowl of cereal again. The Pillsbury Doughboy, no longer Teemo, dances away on the screen. Mom turns to get a napkin. The Doughboy winks at you. Part Five: Playing against other Yordles. When I play against other Yordles, my blood runs hot. Teemo is the true owner of the top lane. Kled is a reject, someone better of driving him and his stupid lizard off of a cliff! And Lulu, that perennial little brat has no place anywhere, let alone in the Rift's proudest lane. Tristana can rocket-jump straight into a wood-chipper. Rumble is a college drop-out, and Corki doesn't even look like a Yordle. One day I went Teemo top against Kled. It was supposed to be an easy game, considering I was a gold III smurfing in Silver II. I got into a one-on-one with Kled, the battle going my way until the freak jumped off his mount at the right time, dodging a blinding dart. I became blinded by tears as my screen turned grey. Then again. And again. Teemo, my animus, was dying and it was my fault. The game ended at fifteen minute and I knew, not for the last time, I failed Him. My eyes went to my personal shrine to the scout, and I swore my framed picture of his face frowned with dissatisfaction. My heart palpitated. Right away I rushed to the pet store and bought myself two things: a rat and a lizard. My mind was a haze of fury and upset, yet the pet store owner let me get them anyway, and even smiled at me on my way out. Almost knowingly... I rushed back into my home, plopping my new pets in front of the shrine. I brandished a small letter-opener, then lifted the lizard over my portrait of a Teemo. "You love Skarl so much," I whispered, slipping my letter-opener under the beast's throat. "You love him, Kled. Well, I-I.. I..." I fell to the ground, sobbing. "I can't do it anymore!" I yelled, sobbing. "No more sacrifices, Teemo!" The truth was, I loved all Yordles. Teemo shouldn't ever ask me to harm what was made from His flesh, His blood. "Quite right," agreed a voice from behind me. I whirled around to find the pet-shop owner. "Finally, you understand." The rat and lizard scurried under the couch in fright, as their handler shrank before my very eyes! It was He! Devil Teemo! I fell prostrate, bowing to my Lord, crying tears of joy and penance. Devil Teemo gently took my blade away. "You've done well to learn the value of all life," he admitted. "I've paid close attention to your journey, first thinking to punish you... then to watch and see if you changed. And, bless the 'Shroom, you did." "T-Te-ee-mo!" I wailed. The devil smiled devilishly. "Say, did your really build AD last game? For that... I think I'll make you my personal servant for life." I offered my hands to him, and he put me in shackles made of silver. They were loose enough to not hurt me weak, brittle wrists. He dragged me into a portal, and my days on the Rift, rather than watching over it, were over. Part Six: My VR Teemo experience. The year is 2026. Oculus and everybody got their business together and figured out true Virtual Reality. The games published can now be called, unironically, triple A. Funnily enough, all they needed to do was provide a way for the game console to 'plug' into the player. The bridged, LAN connection of sorts allows the player to experience a much more visceral and fast experience. Of course, this comes with dangers. Games are now labelled 'rated M, male, 20-45' or 'T, for females aged 16-32.' This is because the bridged connection provides unique, situational sensations that certain biologies are unable to comprehend. Rule-breakers report a few... strange occurrences not available to the public. You know the risks of what you are about to do. Yet you have already stolen your sister's VR device, as well as her host of games on the Steam cloud. You went through the trouble of piecing her password together from her diary, so you can access the 'family unfriendly' portion of her library. It started that day you peeked inside her headset. That single image plagued the back of your lids until you preferred to be blind than... than to see it again without having the capability to interact. Too hungry to put it off anymore, you lift the VR helmet onto your head and plug the USB 7.0 jack into your armpit. By using brainwaves you enter your sister's password and access your chosen game in a nanosecond: Miracle Simulator--Yordle DLC. Right away the neuraltransmitters indicate a squeezing force on your left hand. You swivel to the left, and right away your breath is stolen. "Ow," Teemo says, laughing through a grimace. "Not so hard, honey." You look down and see the sky-blue hospital sheets. The constant beep of a heartbeat monitor bumps in your ears. A virtual doctor towers above your body, and you quickly get into bed to better complete the experience. This is definitely the game your sister was playing. "We're going to be a family?" You whisper into the mic, braving the voice features. Teemo loads a response. "Yes. A girl, remember?" You frown. "VR, load up situation change. Boy." "A b-b-boy, remember?" Teemo crackles, changing his response. "I'm retiring from scouting, getting a seat on the Bandle counsel. We'll never be apart, promise." The Yordle breaks composure, resting his head on you to weep. "I'm so proud of you, of us." The VR presses forward a spongy substance to soak up your tears. They flow freely. "Me too. I'm so happy to be here with you." The doctor finally has his own voice line. "Okay, here we go. Get ready to push--" A fierce disturbance coaxes a howl of pain from you! The hospital room flashes red as the sensation the game wants to deliver, your body is frankly unable to answer. Teemo's distorted, pixelated face gives you a concerned look. "I-Is p-p-p-play one okay?" "Yes!" You shriek to the heavens. "But exit, exit game!" In the last moment, the AI grins and waves you off. You fall out of your bed hyperventilating. The ribbons of your conscience ravel back into their rightful places. That experience almost killed you! "I'm okay," you breathe, "I'm okay, I'm alive." It was worth it, though. You rest a hand on your stomach, and feel a little kick. It was worth it--in more ways than anyone will ever know. Part seven: Dating Profile Single and ready to mingle! Teemo, the Swift Scout. I'm a scout who lives in Bandle City, and am looking for a light, honest-to-heart relationship. Applicants ought to know right away that to get to me, you have to get through my BFF Tristana. We're thicker than thieves, on the job and outside of it! Likes: long walks in the jungle, my work, sharing a drink with friends. Dislikes: burst damage, hard CC, people who can't take a joke, drama. One thing to know about me: I'm a Yordle. You might have guessed it from my profile image, lol. That means I'm shorter, and more emotional than some human or cat-person or Zaunite project. I break down at sad movies and want to beat up the villains in my favorite action flicks (John Wick 2 and Shaolin Soccer, bee-tee-dubs :) ) What I want most in a partner: honesty and commitment. Someone who doesn't underestimate this scout's code. My passion: microbrewing, believe it or not. A quirk: I go to work shirtless ;) So if you think I am a fit, let me know ASAP: a stud like me can't be on the market long, right? Part Eight: a reply to Teemo's dating profile. Dear Teemo, Your body is so chiseled--gah, let me restart this missive xD I can tell from your eyes you have suffered a great hurt in your past, and I cannot help but desire to mend you. A little bit about me: I am a budding warrior from Demacia, known for dispensing justice. Yet no one, not even my own sister, ever asks me to dispense sound advice. There's something so isolating to living in a bubble, you know? I want to make mistakes with someone, get cuffed and put into the backseat of a police car with someone. I read that you're passionate, oftentimes in the wrong way, and I see potential. Potential for the two of us to grow and flourish; live our lives together in imperfection. Will you hold me at night and whisper "it's okay" after I give you a tearful rendition of how I killed a six-year-old Noxian child? How I surprised here from inside a bush and drove my blade through her chest, and into her stuffed animal? People see me as larger than life, but I am so much smaller than a Yordle. Please, deliver me from this constant grief and my devotion is yours to do with as you please. Hope to hear from you soon, xD Garen. Part Nine: Teemo's reply to Garen. Hello Garen of Demacia, You sound brave enough to me. Hope you're man enough for some extreme hiking in the Kumungu HAHEUAHAUAH hope 2 see u soon, Teemo Part Ten: Teemo sacrifices himself in a hostage crisis I regret to inform Bandle City that, at 1:25 PM Saturday, Teemo the swift scout succumbed to injuries endured while protecting the Yordle people. Captain Teemo, even on days off, was on duty. It was no different that fateful morning at the Bandle Mint, our largest bank. When Veigar broke through the glass windows and demanded hostages, it was Teemo who withdrew his concealed firearm, a blowgun, and saved the lives of countless citizens. We cannot guess as to what went through his head in the fight that ensued. But we hope that we, the people, were grateful enough to the scout that he had nothing but gratitude in his valorous last moments. The shard of dark magic that took his life has done the world the greatest disservice. Even its thrower, Veigar, has begged Bandle's forgiveness for removing this brave warrior from our charge. Teemo is survived by his maid, as well as his close friend Garen. As denoted in his will, Poppy will lay him to rest in the Grove Cemetary tomorrow evening, after a procession befitting his brave soul. To everyone grieving, remember that Teemo did everything in life for the betterment of your day. That he would not want to see tears, but smiles on the childrens' faces while they go towards, again, a promising and bright future. Thank you, Captain Teemo, for your duty. Your loss is gonna sting. Part Eleven: Teemo's valiant return to life. Urgot knew he was going to need even more power to fight the chem barons. More than his weaknesses permitted. There was but one option, gleaned by him from a lab report never meant to cross his eyes. A scout named Teemo had been shipped to Zaun for containment. While his kind weeped, Teemo was merely put into an unstoppable rest by Veigar's curse. The dreadnought knew how to break such spells. Crawling forward on crablike legs, he peered over the Yordle. Such surprisingly toned arms, and a stomach taut with muscle... Urgot never considered the ultimate life form would exist without outside... construction. Not able to resist the urge, he pounded the 'awake' button to Teemo. Lightning pierced the pollution clouds above Zaun, went on to strike the antenna-tower! Urgot laughed joyously as Teemo's body flailed, receiving enough electricity to light all of Piltover for a week straight. Alive, Teemo was becoming alive! The Yordle gasped, shooting up on his stone bed. He immediately tugged loose the IV's in his arm and stared at the dreadnought, trying to figure out what was going on. Urgot found it unbefitting of the ultimate life-form to be so surprised. Then Teemo softly grinned. "Thanks for that, big guy," he said. "Wow... look at those arms..." The mechanical man wiggled in embarrassment. "Oh, t-these old things? Weak, the pinnacle of human weakness, you know hard it can be to find good augments around here." "No, no! I bet you could break a watermelon with these cannons." In the hours that came, Urgot forgot all about killing the chembarons and taking over Zaun. Instead, history changed. Teemo saved the world by having a long discussion about thick arms with Urgot. Part Twelve: Teemo eats a poptart Male Yordles have slightly protruded muzzles that make their mouths into tunnels of tiny, adorable, razor sharp teeth. Of course, Teemo isn't thinking about his incredible body, especially not with the aroma of a s'mores poptart right under his pink nose. You, his maid, quit dusting his trophy shelves, distracted to an exxtreme. You risk a glance over--the scout is preparing to take a bite, just setting down the Bandle tribune. "You know," Teemo says, delaying the poptart. "I had a dream about baked goods. I was stuck in some magic box, with giant humans..." 'Eat it,' your mind begs. 'Please, for the love of everyone, take a bite out of your poptart.' After the great scare that was his 'death,' and subsequent resurrection in Zaun, you needed this. "You look famished," you comment. "Eat your food, m'lord." Oh, and how sly you think you are! Teemo grins, knowing full-well that you have a penchant for noticing the little things. He turns his chair over to you. Stuck against the shelves there is nowhere to look other than at him. Teemo lifts the poptart to his mouth. He bites it. You watch as his cute incisors tear apart the cracked outside of the poptart. Then the gooey marshmallow comes: a strand sticks between his right canine and far, top-right molar. How far will it stretch? Mmm... how far, darn it?! Unable to stand alone, you swing back to clutch one of Teemo's trophies--a statue of him leaping over a log, a Nature's Friend award for saving the Kumungu jungle. Glomp, crick, glomp. Chew, chew, chew. You think you've fared the worst of it. Then he stops with his mouth open to breathe, making a show of it just to brutalize your poor, poor sensibilities! A crumb escapes and crawls away on the wooden floor, broken. "Ah, it's so good," he mumbles through the mouthful. "As a good scout, I ought to finish this piece of my rations, and continue to the next. But this.. this bite is more scrumptious, somehow?" "Stop!" You yell. "No more, I yield, I yield!" Just then, Garen breaks into the room. He is unhappy. "What are you doing, dear?" Garen asks. "Don't tell me..." Teemo leans back and swallows. You watch the poptart mush go down into his gullet and the spell breaks, thank the Mothership. "Merely entertaining our maid." If anyone else sat where Teemo did, Garen might have lectured them. Yet the devil is far too charming. The Demacian warrior takes a seat. "Well," he says, "we have a long hike today. Eat your food." Your clutch your own head in consternation. Not another bite... Part thirteen: Leemo NOTE: this section is not about Teemo, but his brother I created, Leemo. Although related by blood, they are dangerous and devilish in different ways. Leemo was born in darkness, which is thought to be the reason for his dark velvet coat. Unlike the light-son Teemo, Leemo was cast away by his parents to live in the Deathcage Orphanage, an orphanage where even infants must fight to survive. Fight he did. His first kill was upon two snakes, who attacked him in hopes of poisoning his strong body. Then two bulls, who attacked him in hopes of poisoning his strong mind. Then two horses, who attacked him in hopes of poisoning his strong resolve. Leemo went on to become a freelance assassin. He has wavy purple fur that creates a human-like part over his brow. He never looks happy except in private when he finds a picture of his beloved, Jasmine, who perished in the HexTech wars. Unlike Teemo, Leemo is dangerous both on and off the battlefield. Say one thing wrong against him, like try to bully him, and he will beat you up. He likes to drink blood for breakfast, eat baby deer for dinner. Sometimes you can find the purple Yordle pondering the meaningless existence of life atop a stone gargoyle, or photoshopped onto the front cover of my Shadow the Hedgehog Videogame. It is foretold that the two brothers Teemo and Leemo will meet one day. Even so Leemo is my original character and I love him devoutly, I know Teemo will kill his brother in cold blood. The true 'original' characters is too pure, too powerful for any foolish iteration to improve upon. I cry knowing my precious and brooding Leemo is destined for the slaughterhouse. Teemo, if you are reading this, please spare Leemo. The sweetest wine is but one flavor, and Leemo is the flavor I partake in when you are busy. Sorry. So sorry. Big sorry. Part fourteen: Team Liquid gets new management. "Gimme back my bobblehead!" Piglet yelled, jumping up and down with his arms outstretched. Dardoch tittered, continued his mean game. The Teemo bobblehead, a precious heirloom to the marksman, shook its head 'no' in disappointment. "You will never get it back. I hate you, you play to lose." Locodoco, their coach, did nothing to alleviate the situation--instead, his grating laughter made it all the worse. "Fools, stop fighting, you guys are idiots who won't listen to me." "Idiots!" Cried Team Liquid's manager from the doorway. "Listen up. You are all very naughty so we have gotten the best to coach you. I had to sign a contract in my own blood." All the toxic players in the room cocked their head to the side, confused. So basically everyone except TL's support cocked their head to the side, confused. "Ay ay ay," the manager groaned. "Look down." Down by their manager's knees was none other than Devil Teemo! Piglet's eyes lit up with sardonic glee. At last, justice would be served to this naughty jungler. Teemo leaned on the doorway and smiled, knocking fear and titillation into the hearts of the young team. Locodoco perked up in his seat. "You are no Tristana, though," the coach whispered, unable to argue against his heart. "And yet, so striking..." "Trust me," Devil Teemo said in his demonic voice, "I get that a lot." "No way!" Dardoch cried. "We just teamed with Disney. this makes no sense." "You think the devil himself and Disney aren't close friends?" The way his long, pointed claws carved itno the door forced Dardoch to shut up. "You have been a sinner, Dardoch. Some might call you the Michael Jordan of League of Legends, switching teams so often, except you haven't actually won a tournament." The jungler flinched. "I wonder what your true 'breaking point' is. Consider yourself replaced." Teemo lifted out a single finger and flicked it up. A trap door opened beneath Dardoch, dragging the Team Liquid player into the fiery depths of League of Legends elo hell. Piglet cried with such joy that his voice cracked. Dardoch's last gesture was to drag his nails across the carpet before being sucked into infinite torture. Out from the flames rose a new jungler. A gaunt and humble student of Teemo. TheRainMan. "TheRainMan?!" Shouted Piglet. "No, it cannot be, he was made irrelevant years ago." "I used to live a quiet life, being toxic in games and sacrificing small animals to my Lord," TheRainMan explained. "One day, I found the strength to stop. Teemo has helped me remain strong ever since." Devil Teemo nodded. "Prove yourself to them, my servant." Nearby, Reignover was losing a game of League as per usual. TheRainMan pointed a single digit, which by dark magics became furred, long. A yellow bolt shot forth from his fingernail, hitting Reignover's screen. In an instant the camera broke away from the player's champion, panning towards the enemy nexus. It exploded. Team Liquid's manager gave a toothy grin. Disney had given him the power to change the fabric of league itself. Part Fifteen: A bit of his blood You sit there, reminiscing on your school paper assignment. This dissertation will decide whether or not you become the Bandle scientist your parents want you to be. The subject of your study is a simple one, yet intrinsically deep by its execution: is Teemo's scarf a part of his body, or a part of his outfit? Pencil in hand, you ponder the question. There is but seventy-two hours left to write, seventy-two hours to do an assignment said to take several weeks. Once again you drift to those long, red strands. If it was so simple as reaching forward and touching the beautiful silk pictured in your memory! The great Yordle, Teemo, is yars away, looking through books without a clue you're studying him. Sighing, you resign yourself to abject failure, putting away your papers. When, in the corner of your eye, you spot a strange substance by the shelves. The allure of the red liquid brings you closer to Teemo than ever before. Close enough to hear the Yordle curse under his breath and say four syllables that set your heart to floundering. "Ow," Teemo cries, "papercut!" The Yordle walks away without another word. The blood rests on the paper of the book. The book's title? Who cares... This is the blood of Teemo. A deep, red marker of the vivacious creature's existence. In the quiet, unoccupied annals of the Bandle library, Teemo unwittingly left it in your charge. What will you do with it? Touch it. There is enough there to get a full drop to form on the end of your pinky finger. It glistens red, and feels thicker in content than your, or anyone else's blood. You almost smell the scout's outdoorsy lifestyle in its formation. Not giving it a second thought you pop your pinky into your mouth. Lights of the entire rainbow hit you! In a second you find yourself strapped into a seat, pen let free! The euphoria of Teemo's blood gives you a lust for learning, a lust for all things in life. A mere drop grants you the rarest insight into the Yordle's scarf. It is both a part of him and a part of his outfit. An identity and a disguise, a mark of how he kills enemies then drinks with friends. Line after line after line--by the time you start to come down from the high, your dissertation is done. But Teemo has found you panting at one of the tables. He frowns, concerned. "You drank my blood, didn't you?" Teemo inspected his own finger, still bleeding from the papercut. "The addiction is so great, if we don't wean you off, you might die." You nod. That is fine. It was worth ultimate bliss. But the Yordle has no plans to let an innocent die due to his perfection. He hold out his arm. "I want you to pace yourself. It's okay..." Your memory begins to blacken and fade out just as you eagerly lift his hand towards your mouth. You see many things in your sleep. A tray of biscuits, a strange machine with many cords, a missive to Riot about fingers. You see a devilish him, a purple him, a him that coaches Team Liquid. You see floating poptarts and hot shoes. You realize how Teemo is an inter-dimensional gift sent to those who need someone to love. An animus. An inspirer. The genesis. As reality rips you away from this endless paradise, Teemo drags you towards his world for one last thing. Your lips finally meet. It is too indescribable, to inexplicable. When you awake, Teemo has left you to your own devices. You stand up and quietly, pleasantly, resume your day, content to put away all that has happened. I finish these words with the greatest joy. Finally my love has been explained, to both myself and to the world. Some will comment accusations like 'have you no shame,' to which I answer that I have plenty of shame, but only for holding back this long. Teemo, if you ever come before me, I adore you. You are my everything, my alpha and omega squad. If it comes to be that we ever can hold hands, know that nothing will ever separate us. Know that, even in the meanest thunderstorm, I will bury my face in your neck-scarf and expect safety, as you expect loyalty from me. We will be together, we will be... complete. Thank you Riot 'Ezreal' for designing the champion. Thank you Riot Games for allowing him in your game, League of Legends. Thank you to the community that plays, whose collective thoughts and desires coagulated into this post. On my lips I summarize all my love: Oh my god... Teemo. Phew! Glad that's over. Now that Teemo's out of the way, let me tell you guys how much I love Twitch... submitted by /u/Papaya_Dreaming to r/leagueoflegends [link] [comments]

ALBUM As a business casual wearer most days of the week, I appreciated this album by /u/thecandiedkeynes. However, like many of the commenters, I felt that the album didn't really nail the look of everyday business causal. In my experience, business casual for men is very casual. At its simplest, it’s button ups, chinos/slacks, and leather lace-ups or loafers. It’s boring. That’s probably the point. But of course that doesn't mean that you can’t look good in bizcaz, or that you can’t express your own fashion sense. Business casual is a dress code not a strict style or aesthetic. You can dress in a variety of styles and still keep a business casual look. In this album you won’t see suits, ties, blazers (okay one if you’re really looking), odd vests, or colorful pocket squares. While I enjoy wearing all of the items above, for most of us they just don’t work for our places of business. Most of the images in this album come from WAYWT posts so they’re real-life outfits worn by real guys, not pinned up models that have been endlessly fussed over. Shout out to all of the guys who post in WAYWT, btw. Enjoy. EDIT: Direct shout outs to the following users featured in the album. I neglected to take note of the usernames when I was putting this together (lesson learned) so if you see yourself PM me and I'll add you. /u/s_waldorf /u/Metcarfre /u/xzaox /u/Tesseractrayle submitted by /u/von_sip to r/malefashionadvice [link] [comments]