Mixed Nuts

This is a repost sub. I’m not the Original OP (OOP) OOP: u/randomredhead10 Published on: r/TwoHotTakes Trigger Warning: False accusations, CPS investigation, family betrayal, verbal abuse, alcohol misuse, family estrangement Story timeline Main Post: January 24, 2025 Final Update: January 29, 2025 Main Post January 24, 2025 My sister (32 F) called CPS on my husband and I. Now that the case has been closed, I have no idea how to confront her. My sister and I have always been close. Every year she spends Christmas Eve sleeping over with her fiance (M 31) and helps us get toys from Santa built and set up for Christmas Morning. We call ourselves Santa’s helpers, and have a lot of fun with it. This year, she spent the night, and saw my husband and father disciplining our son. (M 13) Our son is now a teenager and likes to ignore us when we ask him to do something, pretend he doesn’t know how to do something incredibly simple, slam doors, general teenager sassy behavior. His teachers at school notice it as well, so it’s something we’re working on at home. Our discipline style is somewhere between tough love, and “talk it out”. Every-time a conflict at home arises my son does the argue/flip out then “run upstairs and slam the door” thing, my husband will wait 10 minutes and go upstairs and have a heartfelt meaningful dialogue with him. This happened on Christmas Eve, he told his 3 year old sister Santa wasn’t real, and we both immediately told him that wasn’t okay, and he started arguing with us. It lead to the same typical back and fourth, the difference was, my sister and her fiance were present. Neither of them said anything and went about our usual Christmas Eve routine. Everything seemed fine, our son apologized and went to bed… Upon his return to school after break a CPS worker showed up and pulled him out of class to interview him, about how his parents treat him. He told them he loved his parents and that things at home were fine. He expressed that when we discipline him we sometimes ground him and we take away his electronics for a week, and sometimes he will argue with us, but he knows that when we discipline that we do it because we love him and want him to grow and learn. Now, a little detail about the month of December and its difficulties…I have a seizure disorder, I have not had a seizure in 10 years, and in the month of December out of nowhere I had 3 back to back to back. I was sitting at my neurologists office, preparing for an EEG sleep study, when I get a call that goes to voicemail from that same CPS worker saying the next day she would be coming to our house to interview us and our 3 year old…I immediately shared the number and voicemail to my husband and told him to call her back immediately because I couldn’t. So the very next day after an exhausting round of seizure tests, she came over. When she arrived the next day, we got a better picture of the accusations she made against us. she claimed my husband was an alcoholic with anger issues. she claimed we were starving our 3 children and had no food in the house. To answer the first accusation, it was Christmas Eve…ALL of our family was there, drinking egg nog or wine. NO ONE in the house got sloshed EXCEPT my sister who drank an entire 18 pack of beer to herself that night. We do not have a drinking problem, it was a holiday with family and a delicious meal I spent all day preparing. My husband does not have anger problems whatsoever. We WERE upset at what our son said to his sister, but not in any way that would justify saying anyone in this house has anger issues. My dad and my husband pulled our son aside to talk to him about it. I really Don’t understand this one. To answer accusation 2 as the CPS worker toured our house, we showed her our pantry, fridge and freezer. She literally laughed out loud and said “there’s enough food here to feed everyone in this house for 3 months.” We are absolutely NOT starving our kids AT ALL, and that was obvious right away. When the CPS worker was packing up to leave, she stated “I’m grateful to be handling a case in a functional home with happy healthy kids, usually it’s quite the opposite” Today, she called us back and is closing the case by the end of today. She does not believe any further action is needed and our risk score is low. Upon talking to my parents and brother, all agree this was for sure my sister based on talking with her themselves though she has not outright admitted it. All agree this was the last thing my family needed while dealing with my health issues, and restructuring our lives and schedules around the reality that I can’t drive for 6 months, so I can’t work. My husband and I see this as a MAJOR betrayal. I’m still reeling from the reality that a family member I’ve always been so close with and trusted would make such an impulsive, dishonest and quite frankly cruel decision like this. I have spent weeks trying to figure out how to confront her, as she has not fully admitted to doing this, but has heavily implied it to everyone who’s spoken to her…she went from being overly communicative the day of this interview, demanding I call her and tell her how it went, and in general blowing up my phone…to being silent, and not speaking to me for weeks after I told her it went fine. I believe she knows I assume she did this. I want to have a conversation with her, but I do not know how to do it. I feel betrayed by my sister, and incredibly hurt. I do not want to react emotionally, but I do want her to know this was WRONG.   COMMENTS GroundbreakingPast31 I don't know how or if I would confront her - where are your parents in this? Why aren't they giving her hell? - but for sure, she would NEVER be welcomed into my home again and her relationship with my children would be completely over. And I mean completely. No calls, no texts, no visits, no interactions, no visiting with her at the parents, NOTHING. You don't threaten my family and then have a relationship with them. I would be DONE. Personally, I think you should be done because you need to know that you can never, ever trust her again. Ever. OOP My parents aren’t giving her hell yet, because they’ve been trying to information gather from her while she’s gone silent on me. I definitely plan to go no contact for awhile, the sad part is she’s been progressively unstable and getting worse over the years. I feel like I’ve lost my sister, this feels like a betrayal I’m not sure she can come back from without a lot of work on her end…and not anytime soon. I want to confront her, and let her know that I know this was her, that she put my kids at serious risk making baseless accusations, and that she will not be welcome at my sons birthday next week, and that she will not be welcome here for a long time… beautifulcreature86 How did you find out it was her? CPS isn't allowed to tell you who reported you. I'm not judging and I think you need to go NC immediately and don't even stress yourself about confrontation. Don't work yourself up over trash. I'm just very curious how you know it was her. OOP My parents and my brother, each individually got a hold of her just to talk about the situation and see what she would say, and the way that she was responding made it sound like she felt justified in the actions of whoever must have done this… that and the wording of the complaint fits into what seems like a projection of her own behavior that night, mixed in with some baseless accusations and lies. She’s also super granola health food nut so it’s highly possible that she said we weren’t feeding our kids because when you look in our pantry, we have an abundance of food that her all organic nothing processed no chips no snacks, they should be eating salads and vegan food mentality came out as we’re not feeding our kids the diet she thinks they should be eating. I remember her boyfriend actually saying wow you guys have a lot of spaghetti sauce do you ever worry about the GMO’s? I make dinner and feed my children every single night. We never order out. They eat a home-cooked meal every night. I definitely buy jars of pasta sauce sometimes to make it easier when I make spaghetti or a baked ziti, and we have canned goods like beans and soups and all kinds of things like rice and pasta noodles, they would scoff at based on their diet. Mashcamp Do you know for certain it wasn't her fiancee who called? I'd sit both of them down and talk because it was surely one of them. Or your son did it in a fit of teenage angst and regretted it later and thought just telling them at school that it was all good would reverse it. Best make sure before any actual accusations. OOP Her fiance is a social worker, it is possible she used his position to do something like this, but her fiance was busy flirting with my youngest sister…so quite frankly I have no idea what’s going on there between them. My son 100% did not do this, he came home and immediately told my husband some lady came to talk to him at school and it genuinely confused him. Fluid-Candidate4839 Does your sister have children? Is she jealous of your life? I dont know maybe I’m off base but I can’t help to wonder if she was hoping CPS would take the kids and place them in her home OOP My sister can’t have children actually. She was always the sibling that wanted the big family with tons of kids, which seems a little like a rage induced motive to me…and definitely like family would get first dibs on the kids before foster care. evilslothofdoom This IS a major betrayal. Is she projecting the alcohol usage onto you guys? Is she jealous of your life? Has she done anything like this in the past? Has someone else been talking badly about you and gotten in her ear? If you do have a conversation with her face to face, and it's legal, record it. If it's not legal then keep it to SMS or email, something with a paper trail. Either way; when someone makes false accusations about you and your immediate family you need to cut them off. I say this because if they've done it once they could do it again in a worse way. The best way to cover your ass is to make sure you aren't around them, it lessens their credibility, especially with the closed CPS case. This woman is no longer your sister; she's a threat to your family. You have to put your, your husband's and your children's health and wellbeing above her issues. OOP She is a tad bit jealous of our lives. We have three children and due to her fiance being sterile She cannot have kids unless through IVF. She always wanted lots of kids. My mother also just recovered from breast cancer, and we all got tested for breast cancer, and I’m in the clear she is at a high risk. That happened over the summer. I think her drinking has gotten more out of control in the time that she’s been coping with that information. It was already bad, but it seems like she went off the deep end. I empathize with her a lot BUT… she has done some messed up things to other family members, and this out of all Of them this us the worst thing she’s ever done. I genuinely do not believe she understands what her impulsive decision could have caused with the wrong social worker. What she did is scary and a really big betrayal and putting all three of my kids at risk. Quick Small Update - after 3 days My brother wants to coordinate lunch where we sit down with her to discuss this, he doesn’t think me texting her is a good idea, so that may happen but I Don’t even know if I can look her in the eye right now. I intend to bring up the drinking issues and concerns for her mental health during this conversation, but also try to get to the truth. Will have one final Update after this with more answers. Thank you everyone. 🙏 Final Update - after 5 days (after 2 days from last post) January 29, 2025 My sister (32 F) called CPS on my husband and I. Now that the case has been closed, I have no idea how to confront her. She ended up reaching out to me, and telling me how much she loved me…I responded saying that I had a question to ask, and I needed her to be honest with me. She called me immediately. She opened with saying “I think you already know the answer if you’re asking this question, so yes it was me”…I followed up with “do you realize what could have happened to my kids? To me and my husband? Do you realize how bad the outcome of this could have been?” She began to rant and yell, she said me and my husband Don’t deserve to be parents, that I obviously Don’t care about my kids because I hadn’t even brought them up (which I literally opened with “do you realize what could have happened to my kids?” Literally my first question…I think she was drunk again during this call) she just kept yelling and ranting, and I couldn’t get a word in, I kept asking if I could speak and she wouldn’t stop going off, the only words out of my mouth she heard were “you realize we are going to be taking a very long break from you right” and her response was “I’m sure you will, and I Don’t care” then resumed her ranting, so I calmly told her if she was not going to let me speak I was going to hang up. At this point her ranting was incoherent, something about how she cares more about my kids than anyone (obviously not if you think what you did was okay, and think that showing my kids you care about them means putting them at risk and ensuring that the are also losing a family member as a result of her actions then sure I guess that’s caring?) I once again calmly stated that I was going to hang up if she wouldn’t let me speak…unfortunately that’s where this phone call ended. I hung up and blocked her immediately and then called our father. I told him the way she was behaving on the phone sounded like she was incredibly unstable and either drunk, having a manic episode or both, and that he should call her just to try to calm her down and get through to her, it sounds like he was going to immediately though I Don’t know. I am devastated and still reeling from this. I knew it was her but I really wanted the slim chance it wasn’t to be true, even if I knew it was impossible that it wasn’t. Hearing her say it, sent chills down my spine, she said it so indignantly and like she was proud of her actions, and then devolved into unhinged ranting. Last night i officially lost my sister, I will be going no contact from here on out, but my heart is broken. My dad clearly didn’t want to believe it was her either, because I heard his tone change instantly when I said she had admitted it. My dad sounded like he was on the verge of tears and quite frankly I Don’t blame him. She just caused a massive rift in our family. I didn’t even get to bring up the accusations, I really would have loved to ask her where the hell she came up with the idea that we are starving our kids and have no food in the house, she has never left our house hungry, and our kids have never gone hungry, I would have loved an answer to that but never got a word in once she was going off. I also would have loved to ask her about the drunken anger issues thing, because it was clear and on display on the phone last night, she is the one drunk and angry, not my husband. Of course, I would have loved to make that keen observation but again, I never got to speak once she was going. This is my final update, I have no idea how I feel today besides heartbroken and numb. I want to thank everyone who commented with words of support, and advice, it meant a lot to me and really helped inform how I was going to handle this moving forward. I wish I had been wrong, but I wasn’t. I’m worried because of her reaction on the phone last night she might retaliate, I have no idea if she will, I hope speaking to my dad maybe helped. I’m a little on edge today and sad but just hoping to move forward from this in peace.   COMMENTS kaniiksu of course. i don’t know your family or the situation in full, but i imagine this feels like a betrayal in some ways. did you get her admission on recording and/or do you have record of it? i know some states have laws allowing false reports of child abuse to be prosecuted if they were made with provable malice. OOP I did thank god you can record iPhone phone calls. I’m not sure if it’s admissible in court though, Washington has very strict rules on recordings being used in legal action, when the recording was taken without the other parties knowledge. This definitely feels like a betrayal. She sees my kids maybe 3-4 times a year, and is simply not around enough to even make accusations like this, or have enough information about our daily lives to have any room to speak. She does not understand how serious this is. Winter_Ad_5922 Info: Have you called your sister's fiance to see what's going on? OOP No. I received confirmation from my sister herself. She is now blocked and I won’t be calling her fiancé. I’m unfortunately also running into the new issue of certain family members still wanting me to invite her to gatherings and they “dont agree with what she did, but she’s still my sister” and I should move on which is not happening anytime soon.   This is a repost sub. I’m not the Original OP (OOP) Please remember to follow the subreddit rules, especially the ones about brigading. Let’s aim for a respectful and friendly discussion for everyone involved. submitted by /u/BigONerd to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

I was but a wee lad when me pops thrust his father's father's trusty ol' pipette into me hand, put his 1.5ml tube-calloused hand on me shoulder and said to me 'now, my son, it is your time. You must move small amounts of expensive salt water from one container to another, as my father did before me and his father before him. It is our purpose, it is our duty. Now pipette, my son, pipette for a day not pipetted is a day not lived'. I will always remember that day, 'twas the day my great journey and battle began. Fought through many a bottle of DMEM, I did. But me pops prepared me well. Before I was but a pipette boy. But now, I am a pipette man. Love you, pops. The review: Full name: F-10 Nut Mix (Ham) Aesthetic: not a fan of the light brown/orange schmutz color on the label, but it's a cute rozy pink which is different and we have these funny little dinky bottles so 8.5/10 Taste: despite what the label says, no taste resembling nuts or ham of any kind, which is highly disappointing. Instead it's just very salty (duh), but moreso than the others. However there's no funky cardboard taste like the neurobasal (I keep mentioning it so I guess it truly left a mark on my soul) so that's something. After taste is long but not horrific, the salt fades quickly, 4/10 Mouth feel: this category has been retired because it's just water mate idk what to tell you ~/10 Price point: €27,96 for 500ml (so not whatever this weird format is that's in the picture) which is a bit expensive for what it is considering the lack of ham and nuts, 3/10 Pairing: ham and nuts for I desire, no, crave, what I was promised. Overall: 4/10. Kinda expensive but the aesthetic is fun, and the taste is of course salty but no other nasty detracting factors. Disappointed at the lack of nuts and ham though. submitted by /u/Spacebucketeer11 to r/labrats [link] [comments]

submitted by /u/Odd-Inevitable-8425 to r/SquaredCircle [link] [comments]

submitted by /u/Ok-Huckleberry1967 to r/todayilearned [link] [comments]

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/botanicaownergirl I (29f) recently discovered my bf (32m) of 4 years has been keeping a blog mocking my business. TRIGGER WARNING: racism Original Post July 15, 2015 This is probably going to be a controversial post, as I know Reddit isn't very fond of any religions, especially not ones that aren't mainstream. That might be a weird way of putting it so I apologize if that offended anyone. I really, truly don't want to. When my abuela died, I inherited the keys to her longstanding botanica. For anyone who doesn't know, this is a shop run by Latinos whose purpose is to sell religious, esoterica things. We sell the seven-day candles you'll see at memorial sites, herbs, oils, statues, books, services, etc. These are all things I grew up surrounded by and things that mean the world to me. I love them. To me, the scent of Florida Water and Hoyt's Cologne are home. I took business classes to run the shop properly, and it is a successful business. We profit off it nicely and we made some changes over the years, including services that you can't get at shops around us. We care deeply for all of our customers. I spend about 8am-4pm there every day, and it's like going to my other home. My boyfriend, Thomas, works from home. He does tech work and things like that. He's always been a huge supporter of my business because he knows how much it means to me. He knows it's a part of my cultural heritage, of my life, and of my ancestors and family. He also knows that I do not 100% believe in the things we do. I believe in many of them, but I am not hardboiled religious and I don't adhere to many religious rules. That's enough back story. Well the other day, I made us some breakfast, he finished very fast and went out for his morning jog. I asked him if I could use his computer to do a few things since it was right there and I'm a slow eater. He agreed and just turned it over to me. He left on his run, and I got to work. I just wanted to do a few accounting type things and also do some research for an upcoming trip we have to Havana. But when I opened his browser, several tabs were open, so I clicked to a different browser so as not to disturb his (since I never know what's work and what's play with him). The other browser had one thing up: the blog. I noticed he didn't use the name of the shop, but there was a clear picture of it. And underneath there were probably 50 entries so far. I didn't go through and read them all, because after I saw the first one, I got the idea. I got the idea clear as day. He was making fun of it. All of it. Everything. My heart shattered. He made fun of the customers, of some of the products we have. One of the things we are known for is an extensive collection of candles for different saints, orishas, and figures. He mocks some of the orishas and their candles and the novenas. What broke my heart the most is that he made fun of the one figure who I like the most, who I don't want to mention because I don't want to offend. I keep a small home altar to the figure and tend to it carefully and with love. He makes fun of the altar and talks about how nonsensical it is and everything. The comments range from nothing to spam to dedicated followers who talk about his "crazy" girlfriend, how I'm absolutely nuts and he should run away, who would believe in any of this (a lot of people..) and things like that. I was so stunned and absolutely hurt that I had to check how long ago he made it. I saved the address and read through all of it while I was at work and cried. I don't know how to address this with him. He's been keeping the blog for 2 years now. My heart is shattered because our relationship has been nothing but love and smooth sailing, excitemeny and joy. He never shared my spirituality with me and it was never something that I requested of him. I even keep my altar out of view out of respect for his own preferences. What do I do? How do we come back from this? To me, it is not just about the spirituality. i have grown up hearing people laugh at it and call it cooky and made up, strange and all of that. But it is my grandmother's business, it is my ancestry and it is my heritage. To me, he is mocking those directly. What do I do? tl;dr: Mandatory summary/question! RELEVANT COMMENTS iownakeytar My goodness, OP that's so awful. It makes me want to cry just hearing that this happened to you! The only thing you can do is talk to him about it. And I think you need to say something along the lines of this: "To me, it is not just about the spirituality. i have grown up hearing people laugh at it and call it cooky and made up, strange and all of that. But it is my grandmother's business, it is my ancestry and it is my heritage. To me, he is mocking those directly." It's not funny, it's not a laughing matter, and it is insanely disrespectful! And the fact that he's been carrying on with it for so long -- I really can't wrap my head around why someone would mock something so personal and cherished that they supposedly love. That's the most childish thing I've ever heard -- I had to go back and check his age at the top of the post. Confront him, OP. He needs to apologize, take this blog down, and beg for your forgiveness. OOP How do I confront him? I've honestly never had to confront someone about something like this before. sleepfight "So, I found your blog." That's literally all you need to say, to start with. Focus on how it makes you feel, and that you feel like he doesn't respect you. & I would also consider keeping the funds you make from this business to yourself, for the time being. If he can't respect it, and actively trashes it, he doesn't deserve access to any of the profits (beyond paying bills, etc). OOP Oh, yes, my business is mine and he shares none of it. We are not married and have no joint finances other than me helping him out with his student loans (since I did not have them and prefer to help with something like that) sleepfight I would recommend stopping helping him out with his student loans, for now, as well. He is being incredibly disrespectful about you and your relationship. It would be wise to create some consequences for his betrayal if you intend to continue the relationship. andersmagee Why does he even deserve a full confrontation? Do you need the closure? Because unless this is something you need, I'd pack your things, tell him you saw the blog, and leave. Or better yet, ask him to leave instead. OOP I'm not crazy about just upping and leaving without a word after 4 years. That's all. ~ commenter What is your BF like in regards to the business? Is he supportive? Does he ever mock it openly to you or your friends, or at the business? Is it an anonymous blog or is his ownership of it public? You say he never shared your spirituality, but does he follow his own religion? First off: I'm not trying to excuse his actions. That being said, if he's not religious at all, could his blog be his only... reprieve I guess? from your spirituality? Everyone else here has immediately chastised him for being a terrible person. I'm not going to argue one way or the other without knowing more about him and your relationship. That being said, speaking as someone who does not subscribe to any religion/spirituality: you seem pretty entrenched in the religion. You work every day at the store and you have a home alter (in the home the two of you share) dedicated to it. You probably talk about it a lot and it's probably a big part of the majority of your friendships. I know if I was in his shoes and was with someone I loved and cared for immensely, who believed extremely heavily in something I found ridiculous, I would need some type of escape from it. I would never want to prohibit you from doing anything, and I would never ask you to change something you cared so much for, and would never put it down to you/your friends/your family, but I would need some type of a break from it. It seems like the blog is his break, and kind of seems like it's the ONLY one he ever gets since he's not even free from it in his home. You need to discuss it with him as rationally/calmly as possible (and I know that's difficult when dealing with religion/spirituality, but it's absolutely necessary that no one lose their cool during their discussion). Anyways, with the limited info here, that's my $0.02. OOP He doesn't mock it openly to anyone, of course. I would never stand for that. He does not follow his own religion, but he is not an atheist. He just hasn't found what works for him, yet. But to be clear, it is not a big part of my friendships and I don't really talk about it other than when he asks if anything interesting happens or anything like that. He will come into the shop many days to bring me lunch or hang out on his break, which is where he gets his stories from. But once I leave the site, I don't talk about it to him because I was taught that work and home don't mix like that. Update July 23, 2015 I had my heart set on not just getting up and leaving. There was still some things that we needed to talk about, so when I got home two days after I made that post and had time to think about it, I confronted him. I started reading one of his posts off to him. He asked me how I found out, I was honest and told him. He started to get annoyed and asked me why I was snooping (I wasn't), and then he started up with his defense before I could even get a word in! He told me that he always had a hard time understanding how I could be a part of something where there was no "logic" behind it, how I could take money from anyone knowing that "that stuff is fake" and everything. I let him say what he needed to say. I asked him, is that really how you feel? And he said yes, and that he was happy to finally get it off my chest. He'd just insulted me, my beliefs, my family history, all of it, in the span of 20 minutes. I told him that if that's how he feels, he needs to leave. The place we live in was mine originally, he just moved in after we were dating for a while because it was easier. I didn't want to have to stoop that low, but living with someone who thinks that little of what I do and my business -- the business that's supported our very comfortable lives for all this time -- isn't something I can compromise on. He asked me if I was breaking up with him because oft his, that it was his right, as an American with free spech to do what he's doing, and that I'm trying to censor him like "all religious nuts" do. I couldn't believe what I was hearing so I just asked him to leave. Over the next days he collected his things and when he got out his last box, he told me that he would not come back, but that I could bet he would still be posting on his blog about my shop. I think the last thing I said to him was to have fun with his 15 blog readers. I am really heartbroken over this and very sad it came to this. It's going to be a long time before I try dating again. tl;dr: Confronted him about this and he blew it into his right as an American with free speech, and I was censoring him. I kicked him out and have no intention of dating. Anytime soon. THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7 submitted by /u/Direct-Caterpillar77 to r/BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]

A few months ago, our downstairs neighbors came home with their newborn. I thought it would be nice to leave a note, but since we left it we hadn’t heard anything back and they kinda stare at us if we cross paths. It’s made me feel like this could’ve been received poorly. Does this letter come off as weird or creepy? I should include that I/we haven’t properly introduced ourselves, but I’ve smiled/waved in the past. EDIT: Holy cow this blew up haha. A few things I wanted to mention… There are a lot of comments suggesting that my note could’ve been perceived as passive aggressive and I see that now. That was not my intent whatsoever and I think that’s why I could have overlooked that. I have super noisy upstairs neighbors, so I am very aware of how easily sound travels and just wanted to assure them that we would try to be mindful of our volume and keep quiet for their baby. It came from a good place! Truthfully, it seems a lot of the comments are projections of people’s own experiences and I think that’s why there’s a good mix of not creepy and creepy lol. I appreciate everyone’s feedback, except for the one guy who literally called me psychotic?? Nuts lol In regard to my handwriting, thanks!!! It’s real and it’s mine. :) I love my handwriting! I enjoy the lowercase look and understand that’s obviously not everyone’s cup of tea. submitted by /u/Littlek1dluvr to r/Apartmentliving [link] [comments]